To think my Mother is RUDE and to be seriously angry?

[MumblingRagDoll]

Ok....oday s DDs 7th birthday. She had her party last week as of the 5 little best friends she was allowed to invte, 3 were going to be on holday this week and wouldn't make the party.

DD was fine with this & we decided that today would be quiet....invited my Mum and a friend for a birthday lunch though....which DD is excited about.

My Mum was told last week and reminded last night that the lunch was due to be served at 12.30....she rang me half an hour ago to tell me that my siser had called asking for her to collect my neice from the train station at 1.30 and Mum had agreed!

I was as lunch is being served at 12.30 and the stations half an hour away and my sistr lives another hlf an hour away so Mum would have half a fecking hour with us for DDs "Birthday lunch"

Is that shite? I told her it was and told her she should have told my sister about today....and I was basically upset at Mums lack of thought. Mum hung up, called my sister and then me...she told me tht "Sister is trying to get hold of BIL at work...." as though my neices lift home is MY concern!

Really pee'd off now I intimated that it didnt affect me or my DD as Mum as a prior arrangement with us.

Mum agreed she wouldbe here at 12.30 and said bye.

Then SHE RANG AGAIN a min ago trying to get me to make the lunch later so she can "please everyone"

I said no. I also got upset. AIBU?? Niece is 21 ffs and could get a train or bus or cab home!

I would be annoyed too. Your mum has been thoughtless agreeing to give the lift without thinking it through.

A 21 year old should be able to manage a bus too really!

Don't let it spoil your afternoon though.

YADNBU

Basic manners dictate that prior arrangements always take priority, unless its a case of dire emergency, obviously.

I can't imagine a single good reason why your mum didn't just tell your sister/neice that she already had plans. Seems very odd.

How did it go?

Your mum should have just said "no, I can't come have you forgotten it's your nieces birthday" to your sister. It all sounds very last minute and a 21 year old can sort herself out or should have arranged a convenient time to arrive with her mum earlier. If your niece knows her mum works then I'm surprised she expected a lift in the middle of the day.
It should have been an easy "no" for your mum.

This is silly, I agree, your neice is easily old enough to get a bus or cab etc. I would be cross too.

It went fine and Mum came on time...I think I was annoyed because it taints things if the main person isn't prioritizing your invitation.

I sometimes feel sad because Mum is never here long...she'll whizz in and out..I know she is busy....but when I hear of other women who actually spend evenings with their mum...watching tv and things... feel sad. My Mum would NEVER want to sit together in the evenings as she likes her own house but wouldnt ask me over....I couldn't just turn up as she wouldn't like that in the evening

I can''t just pop in on her iyswim.

As a chlild she never really spent much time with me. I dont moan...I just invite her here....not often....but more than my siblings do.