to think this is a sick thing to do?

[BooyHoo]

my ex has put holes through every single one of my condoms. i found out on holiday at the weekend. realised one had a hole in it, checked the rest. they all had tiny holes right through them. i have already used some. have appointment at gum clinic this afternoon. i am seething. who does something like that?

i have binned all the damaged ones now, in spain. would the police need to see them?

It's not the pregnancy that's worrying, it's the diseases. You must be fuming, OP, that's assault isn't it? Hope you get good news from the tests. :(

i just have visions of me telling the police he did this and then him saying no it wasn't him.

me too lying. i feel sick at the thought of them showing something.

but i think realistically he was potentially harming his children - would an unwanted pregnancy have been good for them? would you catching a life threatening disease have been good for them?

you damage the mother you damage the kids imo.

The police probably can't do anything at the mo, but log it with them anyway in case anything else happens, and keep a record. You can ring a non emergency number just to log incidents.

didnt we have the other side to this aibu a few months ago? im sure ive seen it before (genuinly, not accusing anyone of trolling)

exactly honeybadger. this is what i dont get. is he incapable of seeing the connection between what he has done and how it can affect his children or does he just not care? im starting to think he just doesn't care. he was home this weekend and knew my dcs were with my mum but didn't get in touch or arrange to see them. he didnt call ds1 for his birthday on monday. presumably because he knew i wasn't there so wouldn't get to talk to me.

i'm not trolling. i am a regular. i have posted about my ex alot here before. i dont namechange this is my username. what was the other side of this? soemone posted saying they had damaged their ex's condoms?

Fish the condoms out of the bin, and report it to the police as assault (or something)

Definitely log it with the police. He sounds seriously dodgy and even if they can't do anything at least they will have a record if he tries anything else.

i binned them in spain. reporting him to the police hadn't even entered my head then and they were no good to anyone so i binned them.

you need to report this to the police.

he has recklessly endangered you.

not just the pregnancy issue, as others have said (although that can be traumatic enough on your body, of course!), it's the STD/AIDS - what an evil evil evil man he must be.

whether you've binned the evidence or not, you need to get this logged as a complaint with the police, please do this as if he feels it's acceptable to do (it must have taken quite some effort to get a pin and puncture them all, put them all back as if they were undisturbed, etc) what else might he do to you or a future partner?

How can you be sure it was him though?

I dont think the police can do anything based on your suspicion.

I wouldnt have let him in the house when I wasnt there at all and definitely keep stuff like that locked away.

altinkum you appear to be right:

my.spill.com/forum/topics/anger-over-prolife-condom?xg_source=activity ("Anger over 'pro-life' condom sabotage")

"This is not the first time condoms have been sabotaged at the University. Three years ago, the King?s College Student Union introduced secure and free condom vending machines after several reports of damaged condoms. Newnham College's security department told NewsCore his team were unaware of the incident and local police said they were not involved in any criminal investigations into the matter."

I'd have thought this should be logged on someone's police file though I'd still log it as a complaint, personally.

altinkum, all the condoms were pierced whilst still in the wrapper. i didn't need to open them to tell. the holes went through the foil on both sides right in the centre of the wrapper.

amber i cannot be 100% sure in that, i doubt he will admit it and i dont have proof but i sure as hell know it wasn't me that did it and no-one else has been in my house alone. i let him in the house because he comes to see his children and i happened to have an appointment on one of the occasions. it didn't make sense for me to take the dcs along and have them miss out on contact when he was there already. we were getting on very well then, i had no inclination that he would do anything like this. i trusted him.

i can see what you're saying altinkum, i understand that. i just want to get these tests over and done with and get clear results. regarldess of whether i can report him or not, he wont be in my home again. this has changed things in a massive way. i really thought we could have had a good relationship as parents. the man is sick. i feel sorry for his girlfriend.

are you saying it's not illegal even if there is proof? as in anyone can do this legally without fear of any action being taken?

i find that shocking given it could potentially kill someone.

but surely the intention would be enough? so it is attempted assault iyswim even without damage being caused or provably caused by them.

ah right. yes you're right.

TheHoneyBadgerthat's what I thought, based on high profile cases where someone with AIDs has knowingly slept around... (and some victims have become infected, others not). Although those may be American cases now I think of it!