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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to need a survival guide for DH's broken leg incident??

91 replies

SpareRoomSleeper · 23/07/2011 13:04

DH has broken his tibia bone on his right leg, and has just come home from a week in hospital. He had an operation on the leg, where a metal rod and screws were inserted into the leg to give support to the bone. So as injuries go, it is painful and he is very very dependent on me at the mo. He's using a zimmer frame to walk afew steps to exercise, but at the moment its a big challenge for him as op was only done 3 days ago.

Anyway!

I just know that he is going to drive me bonkers sat on the sofa all day. I already told him earlier, (rather harshly) that he'd only had a leg injury, not a brain injury. Blush...

So ladies, am I being unreasonable to ask for some tips and advice on how to "manage" this situation over the next couple of weeks? Because DH takes ALOT of looking after. And I have a DD (2) (who has been taken out for the day by his parents)....

OP posts:
WhereYouLeftIt · 23/07/2011 14:20

OP, your DH will need to have his leg elevated when sitting, with the ankle higher than the knee (lymph nodes at the back of the knee are where lymph fluids causing the swelling will be absorbed - gravity needed to get it from lower lwg to the knee). BUT, he will also have to mobilise several times a day to reduce his risk of DVT.

The hospital will have told him whether he can weight bear on that leg or not, either full, partial, toe-touch or not at all. Nailing can usually weight bear to some extent as pain allows. He might well find it easier to move around the house if he has elbow crutches rather than a frame - especially if you have stairs. Crutches allows him to share his body weight between the sound leg and his arms - most men have better upper body strength than women, so find this easier. Crutches should always be placed in front of the feet/foot, so that they form a triangle/rectangle. To walk, crutches forward, then the nailed leg to just behind the crutches, weight pushed down through the hands, bring the sound leg up to meet the nailed leg. Minimises the weight on the nailed leg at all points in the cycle. He would be able to stand at the kitchen worktop to say, make himself a cup of tea (weight on sound leg, toe-touching nailed leg for balance), but he would need someone else to carry the tea back to where he is sitting (both hands occupied with crutches).

Stairs - hold onto handrail, crutch in other hand. Take weight on crutch/handrail, sound leg up first, then nailed, then crutch. The reverse for going downstairs - crutch first, slide hand down handrail to same level, nailed leg down, take weight on arms, sound leg down.

A cross-body bag will be really useful to carry eg newspaper, pen, phone etc. Do not let him use a bag in one hand, it can start swinging and pull the crutch out from under him.

He'll find his triceps get stronger after a few days so it will get easier every day and less tiring on his arms.

If he's non-weight bearing or toe-touch, one possible problem is the ankle - the foot will fall into a toes-pointed position, which can lead to the calf-muscles shortening and it then being uncomfortable to get the foot flat on the floor. If you can prop the foot into 90 degrees in some way whilst the leg is elevated so much the better, otherwise be aware the muscles will need to be stretched out later - not difficult, can be done over a few days.

He will need to use chairs with arms, preferably quite high chairs - it's very difficult to get up off a low chair with or without arms when you can only put weight through one leg. Safest way - elbow crutches in one hand in an H shape (both handgrips together, in one hand), other hand on the arm of the chair. Get bottom to the edge of the chair, sound leg tucked under you with foot flat on the floor, nailed leg straight out in front taking no weight. Rock upper body forward, push through both arms into standing position, toe-touching only on nailed leg. Bring crutches to front, free hand through the arm cuff and taking both handgrips, thus freeing second hand to go through the other arm cuff. separate crutches and position in front of you.

Do encourage him to move about as much as pain allows. Muscles deteriorate rapidly if not used.

Merlotmonster · 23/07/2011 14:26

i can feel for both sides...ive been in the position of non- weight bearing on broken leg for 16 weeks... its very depressing especially if you are normally very active...as others have said, you can get about slowley it takes lots of effort and you cant carry anything! I felt guilty about my poor husband having to do everything ie cleaning,cooking, driving, fetching stuff etc... bu beleive me, you wouldnt want to swap places. Standing on one leg is EXTREMELY knackering- you end up with bad back, hip and shoulders, and also, the leg should be raised above the heart....so unfortunately the best position is the sofa.... sorry but i think you'll just have to hand him the PS3 controls, dump a flask on a table and some sarnies and get the hell outta there!! good luck x

MumToTheBoy · 23/07/2011 14:36

Surely if he is using crutches he cannot actually carry anything else, so he will need waiting on. When I had knee surgery I had crutches for 8 weeks. I tried valiantly to get myself a drink, spilt the damn thing everywhere! Can you make up a picnic hamper of sorts, drinks/ snacks/ books/ magazines etc so you don't need to keep getting things?

valiumredhead · 23/07/2011 15:35

OMG It hurt to breathe when I broke my ankles - I could barely see straight, so REALLY unfair to say it's JUST his leg not a brain injury. Apart from anything else he is probably still really shocked by it all - it's horrific to break a bone SO badly you have to have it pinned/screwed back together again, I feel so sick by it all I still can't touch my pins in my ankle ( you can see them instead of my ankle bone)

Sooooooooooo, give him a break Wink

valiumredhead · 23/07/2011 15:40

Actually anyfucker the best thing OP's dh can do now is REST as his bone will not heal - if he does too much now and pushes it too hard he will be in plaster longer.
OP he need his leg UP - ankle higher than knee to reduce swelling :)

wicketkeeper · 23/07/2011 15:54

OK, time for some sensible advice, which is what the OP wanted in the first place. From my own experience, you need to expect him to be
a) very bored and consequently a bit irritable
b) more tired than normal, even though he's 'just' sitting - pain is tiring, and walking with a frame/crutches is very tiring.
c) feeling guilty (missing work, not able to play with the kids, etc)
d) feeling scared - that there will be permanent damage, that he'll have scars, and so on.

Don't mother him, but equally, don't make him feel guilty. Treat him the way you would like to be treated if it was you in the plaster.

Meow75 · 23/07/2011 16:31

Ok, here's my two penn'orth.

Two years ago this week, my DH broke his ankle, and had a pot put on supposedly for either three or four weeks. The first thing I did was get in touch with a company called Limbo, to get a waterproof cover for his pot, so he could go in the shower. ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS!! Couldn't recommend highly enough.

The other thing I wanted to say was if your husband starts complaining of throbbing pains in his leg, especially when he lowers it, say to get up to go to bed, be very careful. I wasn't aware and my husband ended up with blood clots going to his lungs, causing a blockage of 85% of his lung capacity, and a 10 day stay in hospital 2 counties away as we were on holiday when he lost consciousness on a Friday afternoon, 2 1/2 weeks after his accident.

I cannot tell you the number of people who say they've had a Pulmonary Embolism (PE, the blood clots in the lungs) once he told his story to family, friends and relevant health care professionals

Best wishes to you both - that whole period of my life left me needing my own mental health care because my otherwise healthy 34 y o DH nearly died.

saggarmakersbottomknocker · 23/07/2011 16:39

When my husband last broke his leg I booked him in for the snip. Well he was already off work and being a moany old grump so I thought 'why not' - two birds, one stone. Done and dusted.

Teach him to be more careful in future. [cruel]

valiumredhead · 23/07/2011 16:44

Meow that's awful! I was given anti coagulant injections in hospital and I was discharged with them too, I gave injected them myself.

valiumredhead · 23/07/2011 16:45

gave edit!

HomemadeCommunistRussia · 23/07/2011 16:55

When a friend of mine was on crutches, she found a flask with a handle very useful for carrying around tea and not having to get up and make them so often.

Birnamwood · 23/07/2011 17:07

My DP had the same operation and for the first few weeks he couldn't do much due to the pain, and tbh I didn't expect him to. I could tell by his face he was in a lot of pain, even going to the loo was an ordeal. But at 5 weeks the plaster (or back slab can't remember) came off and he was told to start to gradually weight bear on it, the reasoning for this is the nail will take the weight and the bones will have started to fuse and research showed that it healed better when the patient (although dp was anything but patient) mobilised sooner. That said, he broke one of the screws by falling off a bloody ladder when he decided to make use of his 'time off' to decorate the spare bedroom Shock.

He was back at work properly after 6/7 weeks and driving there (which I wasn't sure about but the doc said ok?!?!) I was surprised at how quickly he was encouraged to move about etc and thought it would be months before he was able to get up and about. It took a long time for it to stop hurting when weight bearing but the pain was manageable.

The most useful item for dp at the time was a wee bottle! Oh, and a phone/laptop to do some work (workaholic), the tv remote and various items of food thrown at him several times a day. There isn't much more you can do tbh apart from grin and bear it when he starts to be a bugger, it's inevitable he will, I got on and did all my normal things throughout the day and just made sure he was comfortable/fed/watered before I left running and screaming for the hills

Lizcat · 23/07/2011 17:12

I was lucky enough to be selected for this surgery early in it's development in 1992 , it was developed and pioneered at Harrogate District Hospital. I say lucky enough as previous treatment for the tib\fib fracture I had was traction for 12 weeks. As a vet now I recognise that it is an excellent surgery that usually gives mobility relatively quickly.
My first question is, Is he booked for Dimerisation surgery in 6 weeks time? After the implantation surgery the first week was the worst and the most painful. Obviously you can not carry anything on crutches, but I could balance easily. I also used sports cups for all my drinks and had a bag around my neck to carry them in. It then improved quite rapidly, though I had the Dimerisation surgery at 6 weeks so was on crutches till then. After the second surgery I was switched to walking sticks and told that I should be walking without sticks at 10 days which I was.
If I had had an office job I could have gone back to work at about 3 weeks. However, my job was on a farm at the time so had to wait till after the stitches out from the second surgery.

Birnamwood · 23/07/2011 18:07

Lizcat, what's Dimerisation surgery?

Meow75 · 23/07/2011 18:39

Valium

My DH had the anticoag injections once he was in hospital, but the PE developed when he was at home/on holiday - we went to a cottage in Derbyshire.

Unlike the OP's DH, his was a straightforward fracture whilst playing sport, but still non weight bearing because the fracture didn't go all the way through and most of the damage was on the outside edge. So, after having the back slab for 2 days and then the pot, he wasn't in hospital, but no-one even mentioned the risks of blood clots to us, and I went to all of his appts with him and would definitely remember. The hospital near our holiday wanted to keep him in longer, but also refused to try and get him in a hospital nearer home, so in the end they gave him a supply of heparin, and I was allowed to take him home. A nightmare. Sad

Sorry for the hijack, OP, but I return to my original point - DVT/PE is not a minor thing, so frequently moving about, although uncomfortable is vital, as is having the leg elevated in between times.

valiumredhead · 23/07/2011 18:59

Lizcat eh? Grin

valiumredhead · 23/07/2011 19:00

DVT/PE is not a minor thing, so frequently moving about, although uncomfortable is vital, as is having the leg elevated in between times.

Very important!

Choufleur · 23/07/2011 19:05

Oh you both have my sympathies. DH's smashed his tib and fib last year, had it pinned, then got a nasty infection, had a vacuum pump on the wound for ages and took about 6 months in total to get better.

Put everything within his reach on the sofa, make a flask of tea/coffee, jug of juice/sandwiches/biscuits/any other stuff he needs/wants.

Make sure he can elevate his leg but encourage him to get up periodically. DH was on crutches straight after his ops so hopefully your DH should be able to ditch the zimmer frame soon.

SauvignonBlanche · 23/07/2011 19:11

Why is he on a Zimmer frame, has he had other injuries too?
Is your DP elderly OP? If not, he should have been taught to mobilise non-weight bearing (NWB) with crutches before discharge.

Going in the info you have given I'm with Anyfucker in that initial post-op period withstanding (ie. a week) there is no way someone who is otherwise well needs looking after just because they're NWB.

If there are no other relevant issues OP, I suggest you get onto the pysio dept immediatley and get your poor DH some crutches.

Make sure he takes his painkillers regulary, it will be sore and that you get a break regularly as well! Wink

valiumredhead · 23/07/2011 19:11

Might be worth just asking for some crutches - if I hadn't asked at my first fracture clinic appt I wouldn't have got them!

SpareRoomSleeper · 23/07/2011 22:44

Wow, so many responses!

Well, today has been a tiring day. As he broke his leg while we were away visiting my mum (in another city), we spent an extra week away from home with him admitted into hospital there. This meant a build up of laundry and general things to do around the house so been busy busy doing all that. DH has been up and around using the zimmer frame - about that; before he was discharged from hospital, the physios did says that they didnt think he was 100% mobile because he couldnt use the crutches without feeling dizzy and sick (probably because of the pain) and having to sit down quickly. After several attempts, he literally forced himself to move with the zimmer frame, and I knew it was excruciating pain because of the look on his face. Maybe he wasn't ready to leave the hospital, and maybe I should have said, but I knew that he was really fed up being there. He also wanted me around him, and I was finding it very difficult getting someone to look after DD while I was at the hospital, since we wern't even in our home town, and I knew DH was feeling guilty when I did leave DD behind with someone and come to hospital to be with him. It was all just a very difficult and exhausting time for both of us, and I really wouldn't wish it upon anyone. The physios wouldnt let us take the crutches as well as the zimmer frame, and at the time, he could just barely use the zimmer frame.

So thats how he came home with a zimmer frame. Now on monday, we have to ring up the outpatients clinic in manchester and get him all transferred over to the hospital here, and then he'll get a physio appointment. And ^then^ he'll be getting crutches.

DH's parents have been fab. They took DD out for the day, then FIL came and pottered around doing some DIY bits that I needed doing (that DH was supposed to be doing over this weekend), then MIL and FIL both went out and did a big food shop for us. They're also taking DD during the day for the next few days.

But I am still bone-tired today. My back aches, my shoulders ache, my neck aches. Ive realised how much DH actually helps me around the house, after coming home from work, and doing his own share of the chores (food shop, gardening, DIY, paying bills). Small things like hoovering, changing DD's nappies/pjs/sitting in the bath with DD and playing while I have a cup of tea in the evening, taking the rubbish out in the evening. Getting down on the floor and playing with DD in the evenings (while I do my own thing for an hour), Tiny things like not having to worry about checking all the windows and doors before going to bed.

[shattered and sad emoticon]

OP posts:
LoveBeingAbleToNamechange · 23/07/2011 22:48

Bless Grin

SpareRoomSleeper · 23/07/2011 22:50

Thanks to everyone who has written such wonderful, sensible and sensitive response - I just do not have the energy to reply to individuals because Ive just finished reading through and it took me aaaaaages, but thank you lots x

OP posts:
brighthair · 24/07/2011 00:07

waterproof cover seconded

is it just the bottom of his leg in plaster? if so, when I was on crutches and needed to do my makeup (priorities!) or make a sandwich, I had a stool that I could prop my knee of my broken leg on IYSWIM? so gives you more balance
Stairs for me were better done on bum, I got very adept at bumping down them

valiumredhead · 24/07/2011 09:24

If he was discharged with a zimmer frame it must've been a very bad break OP, eeeek! I spent 2 and a half weeks in hospital as I ended up having to have 3 ops on my ankle, so it's VERY early days for him. Poor guy Sad and poor you, you must be shattered.

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