to be fucked off and totally had enough of dps parents sponging off him?

[griffalo2]

He is paying their mortgage for them for over 2 years after his dad lost his job,both his mum and dad are now in full time work.they have paid for 2 holidays this year,all new stuff for house including £50 fuckin toaster,his dad is in pub everynight and all weekend,now his mum saying she buying new car.
He is still living at home,were engaged but no chance of getting married cause lack of money,he keeps mentioning he wants a baby and to live together.but he just won't tell them.ive had enough of biting my tongue not to offend him but hes being made a fool of by his own parents.
Should I be putting up with this?
They also 'lend' money off him for petrol or his dads smoking and drinking

have you heard those excuses yourself or was it what he repeated to you?

He isn't your partner he's your boyfriend. A partner is a man who shares your life and usually your home. This bloke still shares his life, money and home with his parents.
He isn't your partner who pays money to his parents, he's your boyfriend who lives with his parents and therefore pays them money to contribute to household costs.
He is choosing to live with them and give them his money rather than you. Not sure why you are with him, I would never get engaged to a bloke without also setting a date for the wedding, an engagement without a wedding date is meaningless, although he doesn't sound very committed to you and I'd be inclined to look elsewhere whilst he still sees his able bodied parents as his priority.
In his position his parents should be supporting him and helping him flee the net not wanting money from him. The family dynamics are completely wrong and unlikely to change. They will turn into nightmare inlaws.
Are this bloke and his family really the people you want to spend the rest of your life with?

It sounds like a load of old balls to me. Sorry.

Ive heard it myself,theres lots of them,totally not do able or reasonable ones.
Me moving in with all of them,building granny annex in garden for them.
Its pathetic,they just need to tell him to go ahead, we can manage on our own now.
Hes too soft.

sorry but he is stringing you along he has no intention of becoming independent from his parents

you're really not getting it griffalo, are you? Stop thinking about them, it only matters what he does. And he is doing nothing for you.

Your DP could easily tell his parents that he is moving out to live with you and will no longer be able to pay their mortgage (which surely they can pay if he isn't living there as they are both working) but for whatever reason he would rather continue to pay to live with his parents and sponge money off you. It doesn't matter what excuses they give - your dp could simply leave and stop giving them money. He doesn't want to.

Think ive put up with it for so long,your all right thats wat it looks like/now feels like.im a mug,
Fuck it

I don't think choosing to live with your parents and give them your money rather than move in with your girlfriend is soft, it's just dependant and childish.
He was capable of telling you that he wasn't moving in with you but was choosing to stay with his parents and give them money, so he is capable of telling them he is now choosing to stop paying their mortgage and move out like an adult.
He just chooses not to do the latter.
It isn't up to his parents to tell him they can manage on their own. That is him expecting them to behave like teenagers and him be the parent. The fact that he feels more responsible for his able bodied and i presume fairly young parents rather than the woman he asked to marry him does not bode well for the future. Neither he nor his parents sound very good at behaving like adults, he stays with his parents and gets fussed over but can't make his money last a month, they let him manage their financial affairs.
You will end up mothering the lot of them if you get drawn into this. Find an independant man who wants a mutually supportive relationship and ditch this family.

Are this bloke and his family really the people you want to spend the rest of your life with?

2rebecca, you've really put it concisely and accurately there. There's no way I would tie my financial security to this man - and the OP has a DS already to think about - no way should she consider making a life with this person until these issues are resolved one way or another.

This OP's "DH" is a Relationships thread waiting to happen.

You also said that he runs out of money half way through the month and you end up paying for him. So continues the cycle. You think he is a mug for not standing up to his parents and using his money for himself. But you are doing the same thing with him. Sounds like really you should cut your losses. He doesn't sound like he plans on doing anything about the situation.

For gawds sake. If you dont like this man, who he is and what he stands for - dont be with him!! There will be a woman out there that will. WTF is with the "I want him to do what I want sob" bull? If he was bitching about your core personality - would that be ok?