or ridiculously oversensitive - comment re weight

[livingonsaladalone]

Just need to vent about this really. My mother (makes frequent comments about my weight / appearance, and always has done) just called me up to say that she was sending me a few tops that my sister had bought (for herself) in the sales but had since decided were "far too big for her" (I think she ordered them online), and so they (mother and sister) thought that I might like them. I have never been so tempted to respond with a "f* off" in my life. I have a ten week old baby (my second), and they know I've been trying ridiculously hard to lose my baby weight - I eat as little as seems feasible while breastfeeding, and run every night. My sister is very tall and slim, but (as she is 6 inches taller than me) I actually suspect we're probably quite similar in clothes size just now. Fot what it's worth, I'm 5ft 3 and 9 stone exactly (which is almost a stone more than my pre-baby weight, but I am losing it fast). The comment / sentiment has reduce me to tears and made me feel really crap about my post-baby body, as if I didn't already. A total overreaction to a well intended gesture? Or just a really thoughtless / bitchy thing for them to do?

.I've just lost a baby at 4 months...and I'm your height...and now weight 10 stone 5..the heaviest i have ever been...I think you should feel blessed that you have a baby, even if you are a little heavier than you'd like. I'd give anything to still have my baby.

Tell them to piss off, you sound just right.

Kitesurfgirl
So sorry to hear that.

manicbmc that is the answer

Did you, at any point, ask for their opinion or advice? No? Then they are actually being very intrusive at a time when you should feel you can rely on them.

I have a 10 week old breastfed baby. I am 5ft 3".

I WOULD CHEW OFF MY RIGHT FUCKING ARM TO BE 9 STONE. Might work now I come to think of it. Am 10 stone and a bit of spare change. Right. Allow me to put away the nutella because if you're fat I'm a hippo.

Exercise class tomorrow. Might walk there. Dammit.

If I was 9 stone, I'd be having a milkshake. Saying that, would like to be 8 1/2 stone. Like I am going to lose 2 stone anytime soon. Pfff. Your post has depressed the hell out of me. I thought I was doing ok.

As for the tops, Send them back with a note saying: "these are size 10-12, I am a size 8 now"

:)

I am 5'3" - I consider 9st to be my 'fighting weight', when I look my absolute athletic best. Below that, people start asking me if I've been ill and telling me I look gaunt.

I would KILL to be 9st .

" I have never been so tempted to respond with a "f* off" in my life."
Have you ever heard the phrase 'I can resist anything but temptation'? Go on, give in to it!

And be good to yourself - you deserve it.

Your mum and sister are being very unreasonable.

Speaking as someone with eating issues, if you have a 10 week old baby and you are eating as 'little as feasible whilst breastfeeding' and running nightly then you need to be very careful that you do not tip over into an eating disorder. Maybe you could speak to your GP. Good luck.

I hope I never come out with comments like this to my DD. My mother had a similar repetiore. Every pound I gained or lost was a discussion.

When I was wedding dress shopping, she thought my choice was great, but "a pair of control pants would really help". BTW, I am just short of 6 feet and weigh approx 10 stone.

OP, rise above it. It sounds like you wil be back to your fighting weight really soon. Only a stone overweight with a newborn is great.

OP I don't think you should be running now. I am not a physio, but I do run regularly with a club, and one of the women there who is married to a physio told me that during pregnancy, your joints change such that it is often unsafe to do high-impact exercise, and this persists for some time after you give birth. You might end up with a long-term injury.

I don't know if that is right, but you should get that checked out. In any case, running every day is not good for you; you need to x-train and have days off.

I'd recommend postnatal pilates for your tummy muscles; where are you? - I can recommend some really good pilates teachers in the north or Devon.

Tbh I would take them, pretend to try them and hand them back saying "thanks but they are too big, I guess I'm not as fat as you thought"

I had the gosh haven't you put on a lot of weight snide comment from an old school friend, and as I was in a foul mood I replied " gosh, how kind of you to point that out, I really hadn't noticed that I've put on 3 stones. Still, 6 months of weight watchers will sort that out, but all the dieting in the world won't make you a nice person will it"