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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To emigrate to Australia?!

257 replies

DarlingDuck · 16/07/2011 14:56

DH and I are 30 and have 3 DC's, we've wanted to emigrate for a long time. It would mean me re-training and doing a midwifery degree but I would earn twice the salary in Australia as I would here in the UK. The only cons we can think of would be missing our families and all the huge spiders/snakes!

I realise it will be a huge upheaval and our eldest will be around 10 years old when we plan to go which may be hard for her. Ideally we would like to do it sooner but we want to make sure we can earn a good wage.... AIBU?

OP posts:
echt · 16/07/2011 21:12

Just a thought about those evenings; in the winter in Melbourne it's dark by 6.00.p.m., and still dark at 7.00.a.m.

You don't get twilights as you do in the UK, it's like switching the lights off the further north you go.

Having said that, warm summer evenings in Melbourne are lovely - what a pity the summer was so bad this year. Sorry to sound negative, but the fabulous weather myth IS a myth, though the skies being mostly clearer means that even on a cold day, it's very uplifting.

Obviously it'll be different in different cities, but weather's not a good reason to choose Australia. Every city is quite different, although everyone I know in Melbourne laughs openly at the very idea of Canberra, and sniggers when Perth is mentioned.:o

lastonetoleaveturnoutthelights · 16/07/2011 21:13

YANBU, but if it comes down to salary being more important than family, well, for me that is a shallow reason to move to the other side of the world.

The cost of living in Australia is the same as the UK now, and housing and some food items are proportionately more expensive. I have family there and have visited every few years so first hand experience.

You know once you go, your children will struggle to have a meaningful relationship with their grandparents; or you with your parents - making it work will be down to you and your DH, and a lot of money and time on annual visits (Think 12k for a family, plus most of your annual holiday allowance). You can't expect anyone to come and see you either, it's all down to you, once you move away. Any visitors are a bonus.

As you asked for advice, I'd say go out there for a reccy, think long and hard about it. Discuss with extended family and friends. Give your kids a say in it. Personally, I don't think it's worth it unless you're moving to be closer to family in Australia. The days of the Oz-expat gold rush are over, you've missed the boat (IMHO).

SeymoreButts · 16/07/2011 21:27

DH has been offered a job in Sydney, it's a big pay rise and a promotion for him so we would be foolish not to go. We're off in a few months.

I am worried about the effect on the kids, they are so close to their grandparents, and I am really close to my mum and dsis. It's more palatable as we are telling ourselves it is for 2 years and then we will come back if we want to. DD is 5 and is joined at the the hip to her best friend at school, they will both be heart broken for a bit. Sad I need to get myself into a more positive frame of mind, it will be a fantastic experience while the DCs are young and then we can come home and settle. The we are coming home after bit is very important to me right now.

Our cost of living will go up quite a bit, but DH's pay rise and the fact that he will get LAFHA on his 457 visa helps immensely. I was set to become a medical student but that has to wait now, I might consider myself too old in a few years. I can't go to University in Australia as a temporary resident, I would need to wait until we got permanent residency which can take a very long time. As a temporary resident I would have to pay eye watering international student tuition fees. My limited understanding of it is that you can only emigrate on a permanent resident's visa if your job is on the skills shortage list.

I think to go over as a MW you would need a certain period of practice post registration to get your visa? I don't think you can go newly qualified but I might be wrong!

Wow, I didn't mean that to be doom and gloom. DH has a couple of friends who emigrated together 6 years ago and they would not dream of coming back they love it that much. One has just had a baby and her mum has spent 3 months with them by doing a house swap.

Good luck!

MumblingRagDoll · 16/07/2011 21:36

Seymore I just want to tell you that DD will get over her little friend very quickly....mine is 7 now and her special friends have moved three times....so from nursery she has now lost three seperate girls who moved away. SHe's fine....she mentions them fondly now an then but always moves on...youur DD will be far too busy enjoying her new life!

BimboNo5 · 16/07/2011 21:42

But when the OP qualifies as a midwife in the UK - guess what? NO JOBS. NHS is not employing the newly qualifieds, both nursing and midwifery

Thats rubbish, im a nurse, we take on newly qualified staff...where did you get this nugget from?

SeymoreButts · 16/07/2011 21:46

Thanks Mumbling Smile I hope so. DD seems to have taken it well so far, the first thing she said about it was "you mean, where The Wiggles live? Yeeeeahhh!"

FreudianSlipper · 17/07/2011 00:12

australia is a wonderful country, you can have a wonderful life but it is not paradise (where is). i lived there for a year there were things i loved (restaurants in sydney great, great outdoor living in the summer) and things i was not so keen on (open prejudiced attitudes from so many people i was shocked). i am very independent from my family but was shocked how much i missed them, how much i missed london and the history around me. you do not have that richness in culture and you really do miss it. i loved sydney not that keen on melbourne (do not say that to anyone from melbourne :o) or brisbane or adelaide. have not been to perth.

at least go for a long holiday before you may not like it not everyone does. i could not live there but can understand the attraction

A1980 · 17/07/2011 00:19

DH's uncle has lived in Adelaide for 30 years so we thought there but my Aussie friends our age say it's a bit boring

I have a distant relative in Adelaide and when I tell most Aussies that they say "God I'm sorry". Apparently Adelaide is dull and boring. Having said that I saw an Aussie property programme a few days ago by coincidence, houses there are dirt cheap. A huge house with pool and large grounds was about £250,000. What would that buy here? A bedsit?!

Having said that I just didn't like the look of the town. It's called the 20 minute city as from any suburb you are only ever 20 minutes from the city centre. That tells you how small it is.

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 17/07/2011 00:49

The weather here is NOT "perfect". It has its vagaries as much as the UK, only a bit more extreme. The spring and autumn are generally lovely, fair dos, but summer can be unbearably hot and muggy, and if you live in a water restriction area (so glad we don't but we know people who do), you can just watch your garden die waiting for the rain. Fine if you have no interest in gardening or growing your own veg. Some days we just stay indoors with all the curtains closed to keep the sun out and the air con on all day. Doing anything remotely strenuous (like hoovering) causes you to break out in a muck sweat.

It's winter here now. Older houses are not set up for winter, unless in areas like the Blue Mountains or other mountainous regions. Ours sure as hell isn't - it's freezing inside. I've not been this cold in a house since being in my grandparents un-centrally-heated house in Sheffield when I was a child.
Central heating is very rare; reverse-cycle air conditioners do pump out heat as well (we don't have one) but the cost of the electricity is huge.
It rains, it's cold and miserable, the wind is really something sometimes (especially August). This is NSW.

It does stay warm up in the north; I have a friend in Cairns and it never gets below 20degC up there. She finds it tedious and much preferred NZ (where she was before) because it had proper seasons.

The loss of slow sunsets and long evenings does get to me sometimes - as echt said, it is pretty much like the light being switched off. We do get pretty sunsets sometimes but they don't last long! And it never stays dark later than 8:30pm.

re. the food shopping. I was back in the UK in May and the first thing I did was go to Tesco for a big food shop - my trolley load looked like it would be about $200 (£125) so I was really Shock and happy that it was only £87. It cannot be compared, unless you do all your shopping in M&S - food is more expensive over here. However, if you're not bothered about brands you recognise, Aldi is here and is much cheaper than Coles or Woolworths.
I know we are currently suffering from the extreme weather that has hit Queensland in the last few months but bananas here cost ~$14/kg (that's about £8.50) - in the UK in May, they were 69p/kg in Tesco. That's an extreme example but fruit and veg varies week to week in cost, depending on availability, FAAAAARRR more than it does in the UK. Grapes for e.g. can go from $2/kg to about $14/kg.

Another point to make, although it's changing a bit now with the exchange rate - plane tickets FROM Australia to the UK are generally more expensive than those from the UK to Australia. So consider buying returns from the UK.

Morloth · 17/07/2011 01:14

Cost of living in Sydney is much higher than in London.

There is a big cultural difference as well. Really shockingly big. I have lived in many countries over the years but was amazed by how difficult I found UK/Australia compared to say Australia/Singapore, perhaps I just wasn't prepared for it.

TBH DS1 has found our move home harder than I expected, he is 7 and it has been quite hard on him to leave all his mates and all his idea of 'normal'. We won't be moving overseas again until our youngest is finished school (well we don't intend to but shit happens).

lulalullabye · 17/07/2011 01:15

Just like to say that Adelaide is a great city. We moved here Easter time after spending 2009 in Melbourne. The city is great, not playing at being a city, just a real place that is small and welcoming and unpretentious. Nobody here cares about what car you drive, where you live, who has the best house. There is a distinct lack of 'posh' 4wd's as in all other cities. The parks are huge and great and most people spend their days there with friends,families, bbq's etc.
People seem to think and give the impression that Adelaide is a backwater town, but it depends what you want out of life. The public high schools here are some of the best in Australia.

As for the OP, if the move is not planned for 5 yrs then she will have post qualification experience by the time she gets here. There is talk that there will be a big recruitment drive for midwives as they are short here too.
I think if you are ready for an adventure and you are happy to do it then go for it.

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 17/07/2011 01:27

Hi Lula! So you're there now, and obviously enjoying it :) how was the move in the end?
You're right though - it is what people want out of a town/city that matters. Adelaide would probably suit me fine; but then I couldn't handle living in Sydney (the traffic!). Or Canberra for that matter (I know it has great facilities but it still looks like Milton Keynes, sorry!)

domesticdiva · 17/07/2011 01:30

I'm sat here after an evening with the loclas, whom have managerd to get my 9 month old off to sleep within 3- minutes a tash wchich i thought would never e acheivable. oh im going to have to go now as im psheds on the wargi! soz but mobving abroad is ace even if u do follow ure stupid surgoen of a husband 2 somehwere what doesnat have electrictoiry xx

lulalullabye · 17/07/2011 01:35

Hi thumb. Yes we did go to Adelaide as Dh had a job offer here. We love it and are so pleased we ended up coming to Adelaide. The houses and hills are beautiful and the fact that you can get anywhere in '20' mins is ace!!

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 17/07/2011 01:36

domesticdiva - sounds like you had an excellent evening on the grog! Grin

lulalullabye · 17/07/2011 01:37

P.s thumb, the move was another story as we ended up in Melbourne for a month and the Adelaide, so it took a long time to get sorted but now feels like we have lived here forever. I have even stopped converting to the pound all the time!!

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 17/07/2011 01:44

I'm working on that bit, lula - but when something looks too expensive for what it is, I still do the conversion just to see! Blush
I'm sure there are other Aussie MNers in Adelaide, aren't there? Have you hooked up with any of them yet? I just had to miss the Sydney meet up due to DS being ill with lurgy, and I knew 2 of them had brand shiny new babies and didn't want to pass anything on. :( But there'll always be another one!

savoycabbage · 17/07/2011 01:45

We saw 'wanted down under' when we were at home over Christmas. We were literally crying with laughter at the skewed information.

Showing them houses in the 'ghetto' that would be 90 minutes away from their jobs. By the time they got home the daycare centre would be shut. Not that the cost of childcare was ever factored in! We took bets on how many times the adult who was planning not to work said 'well, I could get a job'.

The one where the woman was a teacher moving to Melbourne (I was a teacher and I live in Melbourne) made me cross.

"You just register, phone a school and tell them you are available for work and get a full time job" Really!

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 17/07/2011 01:58

Perhaps we should start our own "Mumsnet Guide to Living in Australia", hey! Dispel a few of the myths out there...

domesticdiva · 17/07/2011 01:59

ta everyone but whta im going to do when my batteries run out i don't know!!! pack enough batteriers to last at least three weeks of mr tummble and you'll ne fine!! plud stay away from the waragi!! ph sorry thats just me!! soz xx

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 17/07/2011 02:02

DomesticDiva - you really have no electricity?? Get yourself a generator or something, there must be a way to get electricity.

JarethTheGoblinKing · 17/07/2011 02:09

YANBU. We're very tempted.

JarethTheGoblinKing · 17/07/2011 02:10

we saw HP7 pt 2 tonight. it was exhausting Grin

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 17/07/2011 02:18

really? Did you see it 3D? was it all the jumping and trying not to blub that wore you out? [hwink]

Yay, come out Jareth! Except you won't come out where we are :( - no one does!

JarethTheGoblinKing · 17/07/2011 02:24

2D, along with all the other old codgers hey you didn't want to watch 3 d .
Was v good though... I was too involved with all the fight scenes