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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU - Just now at supermarket

58 replies

BunnyLebowski · 13/07/2011 12:47

Took DD to the supermarket. Approached the trolley bay and saw there was 1 elderly lady putting her pound in for a half-trolley and another lady waiting.

DD and I stand behind second lady and wait our turn. As the lady turns to go another woman walks straight past us and pushes in front to get the next trolley. Now I realise I could have smiled benignly and waited our turn but she clearly saw us and why is her time more important than ours? So I said 'Excuse me, what exactly do you think we're standing here waiting for?' and stepped in front of her and got the next trolley.

Her: 'I didn't fucking see yer. Chill out'

Me: I'm perfectly chilled out thank you. I just have no tolerance for people with no manners or breeding. And nice language in front of a 3 year old.

We walked away and into the supermarket.

5 mins later while perusing the pink ladies I felt a sudden and painful whack to the back. The crazy moose had only rammed her shopping trolley into me on purpose Shock and then strode away.

I hung back, rang DP and asked him to persuade me not to fashion a shiv out of the pen in my handbag and continued shopping. Didn't see her again.

I now have a big old bruise on my upper arsecheek. Too early for Wine?

So what's the verdict? Was I unreasonable to point out her rudeness?

OP posts:
LoopyLoopsBettyBoops · 13/07/2011 13:07

Breeding? Breeding?

You probably deserved it for that word alone.

5Foot5 · 13/07/2011 13:09

What exactly is a pink lady?

HowlingBitch · 13/07/2011 13:10

A lovely apple!

worraliberty · 13/07/2011 13:10

A pink lady is an apple wot people wiv breeding eat Grin

HomemadeCommunistRussia · 13/07/2011 13:10

What's a 'shiv'? Confused

PinotLovesRonWeasley · 13/07/2011 13:11

I think you were very rude (and pompous) and she was very rude (and physical) back.

Both as bad as each other IMO.

Maybe look at your own manners, eh?

thursday · 13/07/2011 13:12

if you'd been more polite yourself when pointing out her rudeness she wouldnt have taken any notice? and that would have been a worse result than getting rammed in the back with a trolley? Hmm

the breeding talk was uncalled for, though she started swearing and you retaliated with pomposity so i don't think it was that out of order tbh. whatever you said to her didnt justify physical assault and i would think about reporting it tbh. mad women who attack strangers who have young children with them aren't fit out really.

thursday · 13/07/2011 13:13

shiv - make-shift knife. its what they call them in prison.

houseofheave · 13/07/2011 13:13

No, not being unreasonable.

She was rude pushing in, rude swearing in front of a child and the ramming you with a trolley proves that its deliberate.

GetOrfMoiLand · 13/07/2011 13:13

I would have said something along the lines of what bunny said as well.

I don't think it is pompous, I think it is just effective arguing with the stupid.

Totally uncalled for to be rammed by the nasty witch. Jesus that is a complete overreaction. The woman couldn't get her synapses firing quickly enough to retort to the OP, so she rams a trolley into her? How the hell is that justifiable.

Quite astonsighed that people are saying the OP was rude actually.

PanicMode · 13/07/2011 13:15

I think that you could have been more tactful Wink but YANBU - she shouldn't have 'attacked' you.

I (politely) asked a plumber to move his van out of a mother and baby space when I was 8 months pg with DC2 and carrying my 14 mth old toddler. He used a few choice words, gave me the bird and refused so I found a teeny space. 10 minutes later this man came into the shop, started yelling at me, almost hit me (put up a fist and then stopped himself), and the Security guards WATCHING did absolutely.....nothing. When I complained and asked for help to identify him, they refused and gave me a £10 voucher. Needless to say, I didn't shop there again.

needanewname · 13/07/2011 13:18

Not at all unreasonable. You weren't rude either, better to sound a little pompous than foul mouthed if you ask me, thought your reply was perfect Grin

Purplegirlie · 13/07/2011 13:19

I can see why you got annoyed, OP, but I think I would have just let this one go. Did she look like quite a rough sort that would be likely to tell you to eff off?

She was totally out of order ramming you with the trolley, but I think you came across as very superior in how you spoke to her, especially with regards to the "breeding".

HomemadeCommunistRussia · 13/07/2011 13:23

YANBU There's no excuse to ram someone up the arse with a trolley on purpose!

It wouldn't have mattered if you had sworn and insulted her when she pushed in.

I always tell my dc that it does not matter what someone says to you-as soon as you get physical you are in the wrong.

WhippedCream · 13/07/2011 13:26

you commented on her 'no manners or breeding' Shock

she should not have assaulted you though.
did you tell the check out person? I would have! Smile

squeakytoy · 13/07/2011 13:27

You need to go to Waitrose OP, they dont charge for their trolleys Grin

And you get a better class of shopper Wink...

WhippedCream · 13/07/2011 13:28

Howlingbitch LOVE the Lady Catherine de Bourgh mention. great post

sausagesandmarmelade · 13/07/2011 13:28

I think upbringing would have been a better choice of word....

But, no matter, you did nothing wrong!

Scholes34 · 13/07/2011 13:33

You had a good point to make, but didn't make it in a good way. It's easy to see how someone with "no manners or breeding" would react that way, so you should have been prepared. No doubt she would have known what a shiv was too.

AmberLeaf · 13/07/2011 13:54

You had me until the 'breeding' part!

BeerTricksPotter · 13/07/2011 13:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

oohjarWhatsit · 13/07/2011 14:03

So I said 'Excuse me, what exactly do you think we're standing here waiting for?

i would find that quite abrasive and it would put my back up

you only needed to say excuse me, i think we were next.

GetOffOfMyCloud · 13/07/2011 14:04

I think you WNBU to tell her to wait her turn but the way you said it was quite confrontational and would get most peoples backs up, especially if (big if) she genuinely hadn't realised you were waiting. That said it absolutely does not give her the right to physically assault you so YANBU to be upset about that!

spookshowangel · 13/07/2011 14:04

i dont think it was ur. the breeding thing is just what people do when confronted with some who id being argumentative you up the anti. if the woman had said oh god sorry didnt see you, that would have been the end of it but it wasnt so op the proceeded to put her verbally in her place Grin then got rammed for her trouble dont think you can expect more op.

spookshowangel · 13/07/2011 14:06

not sure op would fit in at waitrose though if she knows how to turn her pen in to a shiv.