to never speak to my mum or her husband ever again

[gerafle]

Went over to my mums for a barbecue today and halfway through he just started having a go at me and kept being nasty , he said that I was carrying more timber than the amazon rainforest, my hair was terrible and that I had enough makeup on to paint their kitchen. My brother told him to leave me alone and he then said to him that he should "pull his tongue out of his sisters arse". My mum who was quite drunk found the whole thing hilarious, right now I feel like I never want to speak to them ever again.

Being drunk is a lousy justification for being an arse.

Alcohol does not change you into a wanker - it releases you from your inhibitions that make you hide the fact you are a wanker. Like angry or violent drunks, the mask slips when you havehad a few.

After 15 years as a licencee i can honestly say that nice people make nice drunks. They may be rowdy, tactless, clumsy and annoying but they generally make a fool of themselves not others. If unpleasantness occurs there is ALWAYS something else behind other than being tipsy.

I would steer clear of him, and if your mum cant see fault, her too.

Banter is just an excuse for being a cunt.

If a person can't have a drink without turning into an obnoxious rude fucker then to me, it signals a problem and that they should stay away from the juice.

I wouldn't bother with them until they bother to contact you, then I would express how awful they were and if they don't apologise then more fool them. Move on.

"Nice people make nice drunks. They may be rowdy, tactless, clumsy and annoying but they generally make a fool of themselves not others. If unpleasantness occurs there is ALWAYS something else behind other than being tipsy."

Couldn't agree more with this, MF.

OP, I'm sorry your mum's married such an arse but I wouldn't be hanging around for more of the same. I would tell her, though, when she's neither drunk nor hung over, that you don't like him or the way he "makes" her (may as well be kind) join in with his rudeness. And that you won't be seeing him again.

I agree.

(Speaking as a ridiculously soppy, "Everyone Is My Bestest Friend And I Love Them", affectionate drunk)

Seriously though - I think MF is spot on with her remark.

Ahhh Calamity you are my favourite kinda drunk

Oh OP I am shocked and horrified on your behalf! I would be upset, and hurt, and mortified and angry if I were you

And I know that my mom would always spring to my defence if she heard anyone speaking about me like that and defend me to the hilt, no matter who it was. That is the bit that would hurt me the most :(

Being drunk is no excuse and I absolutely agree that nice, pleasnt, loving people do not turn into wankers when they are drunk

I would expect an apology and a pretty fulsome one at that.

YANBU being drunk is no excuse for this behaviour.

Hmm I wonder if your Mum is usually the recipient of his abuse, and was laughing in the well-known bully's-accomplice way - a "thank God it's not me this time, I'd better laugh or it will be" sort of thing.

If you have previously had a good relationship with your Mum I wouldn't drop her, in case she needs to confide in you. However, if she has form for being a cow, I think I'd think Enough is Enough.

I am sure I have heard this one before!!!

There was a thread that was similar, i think its just drunken barbecues bring out the worst in people.

When summer finishes we have drunken Christmas parties to look forward to.