to just want one compliment. Just one.

[HappyDoll]

I'm not fishing, honestly, I don't want to be complimented by people who are only going by what I say, but I just want to ask opinion really.

I have had a friend for about 2 years, and I have just about had enough. I've looked back carefully over the last couple of years and she has not said one nice thing about me. Not one.

But it's not just her. I've just returned from a meeting at school and it was all 'ooh I like your hair Sue, I like your shoes Jane, I like your blah blah Sheila'. I'm friendly, get on with most people and I live by the rule that if you think something nice, you should say it and if you think something mean you should consider why and then rant about it on mn.

I've just come home and burst into tears over this. Honestly, I can't remember the last compliment I received. What the fuck is wrong with me?

OP, I know exactly what you are saying. The same thing happens with me. I never get compliments:( I keep hearing from others or finding out from 'sources' how so and so admired my this or that, but nobody ever tells me.
I think the best way to deal with it is to just accept it. Don't compliment people in the hope that they'll say something good about you. If you like the jacket you are wearing just be happy you've got it on and don't expect anyone to gush over it. The fact that you like it and feel good in it is good enough.
I'm not talking about myself here, but I have noticed that some people inspire jealousy and resentment in others. People are hesitant to compliment someone who has what they want or who is like someone they aspire to be. I don't know why, but this happens. So just take it with a pinch of salt.
Perhaps you are so fabulous that people are afraid to admit it

'some people inspire jealousy'. Isn't that sad. I honestly think I do and yet, if you actually look at my life it's really fucking hard. I think the point is I'm supposed to be poor, dowdy and miserable. Then people might tell me how strong I am???!

HappyDoll, the bad things about other people are easier to say, and the bad things we hear about ourselves are always easier to believe. Very sad but true.
I'd say screw what people think, and bask in your fabulousness

violet5 I just want to say that you have gorgeous hair and that despite having 6 children you look incredibly young, slim and gorgeous.

I'm basking Dancing !

LOL Happy. You have a great sense of humour. Oh gosh! I just paid you a compliment

Ooh ooh ooh, I've just thought of something else. I have mahoosive norks, and poker straight hair. I spent most of my early teenage years praying for little B cups and a perm while my girlfriends were stuffing their bras and saving up for GHDs. All these people started saying 'I wish I had your boobs / hair / both' .

I soon realised that there can be so many different permutations of perfect. In fact, perfection is what you start with and you have to be happy with that.
It's a valuable lesson to realise that for ever top that gapes at your boobs, there's a 50's vintage skinny-belted sweater crying out for some fillage! It's hard to be jealous or insecure when you realise that.

Guess what??!!! Both my cleaner and my friend (not the aforementioned!) came over this morning and waxed lyrical over my fabulous skirt!
I sort of skipped around the kitchen tra la laaing thank yooooou's!!

You also could compliment yourself more. If you feel good about yourself and your achievements you will be less reliant on other people's praise to make you feel good.

It sounds to me that people may assume that because you look good and have coped with all that life has thrown at you, they are saving their compliments for people who look as though they need a boost.

I also agree that giving compliments makes the world a better place. However, I hate it when I compliment someone and they compliment you back straight away, half the time they don't mean it