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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to expect my teenagers to get up before 11am

74 replies

ShirlOckholmes · 05/07/2011 10:34

Since my teenage twins finished their exams at the end of June and they don't have to be back in school until September, AIBU in expecting them to get up at a reasonable time.
They seem to have become nocturnal, staying up til 3 or 4 am then sleepig until 1 or 2 pm. When they are awake they spend most of their time on X-box. Its driving me nuts!!
Is this normal? Do teenagers need so much sleep?

OP posts:

pixielovescake · 05/07/2011 10:36

Haha i used to do this. Is it hurting anyone ? Are they still helping you out/keeping quiet so you can sleep etc ? If they are id leave them be. You only get to be young once.

BertieBotts · 05/07/2011 10:36

I read somewhere once that teenagers' body clocks are offset slightly so they often do this.

Remembering being a teenager though it was probably more about having the house to yourself once parents are asleep

HarrietJones · 05/07/2011 10:36

Yes it's hormonal! But if they are staying up that late it's only a normal nights sleep shifted.

pixielovescake · 05/07/2011 10:36

And i think they might need more sleep..than adults at least. I think anyway.

worraliberty · 05/07/2011 10:37

Teenagers do apparently need more sleep but it's very easy for anyone of any age to become nocturnal.

Is there nothing they could be doing in the day? Voluntary work or something?

If anything, it's good experience and will help them build a CV.

strandedbear · 05/07/2011 10:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BertieBotts · 05/07/2011 10:37

It does seem to be pretty much universal though. Perhaps the body clock theory is true - they carry on into their 20s when they go out clubbing etc. I think the only thing that stops you is when you get too old or serious about your career to be able to get up for work after 3 hours sleep.

pixielovescake · 05/07/2011 10:38

x post stranded bear !

pozzled · 05/07/2011 10:42

Do they have any reason to be up? What are their plans for the holiday? I think if a person can have a lie-in then why not, I certainly would! But on the other hand it's a long time until september. I'd expect them to make some kind of plans for that time, even if it was only for a couple of days a week- paid work, voluntary work, hobbies, going away or whatever.

GiddyPickle · 05/07/2011 10:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tudorrose · 05/07/2011 10:44

My daughter was like this after her exams too. I let it go mostly, so long as she didn't disturb her younger sisters at night.

She was working most weekends in a nursing home and a shop so it wasn't all day every day.

The only time it really annoyed me was when she would shout at the little ones for waking her up too early, ha ha, this was about half ten.

She still helped out in the home. I remember doing the same too after my exams if I am honest!

kazzymac · 05/07/2011 10:44

Mine are doing exactly this too! (I have twins) They have looked and applied for a part time job but there is not much about. I have told them they have to get some work experience (unpaid) or volunteering for some of the holiday but in the meantime they seem to be having a good time anyway! : )

noddyholder · 05/07/2011 10:44

I have given up on this and am glad of the peace!

bebemooneedsabreak · 05/07/2011 10:46

It is normal and it's also been shown (as others have posted) that teenagers do often need the late(r) sleep pattern. As long as they're not causing too much trouble in the routine I'd let it go. (And to me 11 seems reasonable tbh... 1 would be pushing it 2 to 3 would be taking the piss)

ICantFindAFreeNickName · 05/07/2011 10:48

As long as they do whatever chores you give them & they are not disturbing the rest of the household does it really matter. They have probably had a lot of stress over exams over the last school year. Leave them alone to chill for a couple of weeks. This might be the only chance they get to just do nothing.

aliceliddell · 05/07/2011 10:50

The bodyt clock of teenagers is different to children and adults. The brain goes through major developments - the production of melatonin (?) you canget it in USA for jetlag, here for ADHD - regulates sleep cycles according to daylight. Schools in Denmark (?) USA and some in Newcastle and Kent are now starting a couple of hours later and exam results have improved massively. Seems it's as normal as waking at 3am demanding food when they're babies.

SpecialFriedRice · 05/07/2011 11:03

YABU

Did you not do this as a teenager?

When I was at school I would go to bed at 11 and up at 6 no bother.

Soon as the summer hols came I was up later and needed about 12 hours sleep instead of the 7 that was fine during term time.

Its pretty normal!

Insomnia11 · 05/07/2011 11:06

Let them sleep. There has been some research to show they actually need it at their age. I did this from age 13 - 20.

TrillianAstra · 05/07/2011 11:07

As long as they do any chores that are expected of them and are respectful of other people wanting to sleep when they are awake (so no being LOUD at 3am) then what's the problem?

IAmNoAngel · 05/07/2011 11:57

Yep, my son is like this at the moment, I just leave him to it. The house is much more peaceful with him asleep!

Maryz · 05/07/2011 12:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SarahLundsredJumper · 05/07/2011 12:35

Never wake a sleeping teenager
My DM would literally charge into my room to wake me as she thought I "ought" to be up at 7 -even on a Sunday!-needless to say I really resented it.
If they arent waking up the rest of the house I wouldnt worry -if I need to be up early I tend to warn them and they are pretty reasonable about going to bed around 11pm.
My DD has just completed her exams -she is on her knees with tiredness -its like having a large cat around the house -curled up on the sofa ,lolling about

GetOrf · 05/07/2011 12:40

I leave dd to sleep as long as she likes. She can get up when she likes. I know she will do the chores - if she doesn't she gets no cash so that is an incentive.

I am 33 and could quite happily sleep until midday now. Never get the chance though.

reelingintheyears · 05/07/2011 13:11

I leave DS2 as long as possible....

Less hassle that way.

Now he has a part time job (aswell as college) he has to get himself up when he's working/college.

KaraJS · 05/07/2011 14:04

Mines the same, better than him being up tormenting the other kids and using all the pots in the house to cook!

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