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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect my teenagers to get up before 11am

74 replies

ShirlOckholmes · 05/07/2011 10:34

Since my teenage twins finished their exams at the end of June and they don't have to be back in school until September, AIBU in expecting them to get up at a reasonable time.
They seem to have become nocturnal, staying up til 3 or 4 am then sleepig until 1 or 2 pm. When they are awake they spend most of their time on X-box. Its driving me nuts!!
Is this normal? Do teenagers need so much sleep?

OP posts:
KaraJS · 05/07/2011 14:04

Mines the same, better than him being up tormenting the other kids and using all the pots in the house to cook!

KaraJS · 05/07/2011 14:05

Mines the same, better than him being up tormenting the other kids and using all the pots in the house to cook!

KaraJS · 05/07/2011 14:05

Mines the same, better than him being up tormenting the other kids and using all the pots in the house to cook!

terby · 05/07/2011 14:29

I dont let my children sleep in past nine oclock. There are so many productive things they could be doing, and I think it is a bad habit to get into.
I was never allowed to as a child, and as a result I am an early riser and very much a morning person.

TanteRose · 05/07/2011 14:35

I don't think being a morning person as an adult has much to do with not being allowed a lie-in when you are a teenager.

As has been mentioned, teenagers body-clocks make them naturally more nocturnal

Maryz · 05/07/2011 14:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TanteRose · 05/07/2011 14:45

I must admit, I smirked a tiny bit at "productive things"....erm, like keeping the sofa warm, making sure the TV is working, getting the benefit of nutrition (i.e. eating)...

sorry....Grin

SarahLundsredJumper · 05/07/2011 15:42

Terby As I stated earlier I had to get up at 7 no matter what -guess what I could sleep for England Grin
Its the holidays they are tired -let them sleep.

eurochick · 05/07/2011 15:49

Let them sleep. They are teenagers. Sleeping and making the place look untidy is what they are best at.

BelleDameSansMerci · 05/07/2011 15:53

God, I'd still be in bed now if I were a teenager/didn't have DD/a job/etc...

I say let them while they can.

ratspeaker · 05/07/2011 16:12

Sounds like mine
except for 2 days a week when he goes to help his gran - he zooms round with the vacuum, dusts and tidies.

I reckon his body is here but his brain is on USA time

controlpantsandgladrags · 05/07/2011 16:30

Envy Envy Envy

My 2 are up at 5am every day.......swap you if you like??

Want2bSupermum · 05/07/2011 16:30

Wow - I wish I had you lot as parents when I was a teenager! During school holidays we were up early (5am) and expected to help out at home (parents ran a farm and businesses). I remember finishing my exams and coming home for 2-3 weeks. I thought I would be able to relax but my Dad told me that it doesn't work like that in the real world so it wasn't going to happen at home. He did compromise though and let me sleep until 7.30am and I was given 'light duty' chores to do (stuff like cleaning, ironing, food shopping, office work etc). After term ended I was back on the 5am starts until school started again.

I would think it is reasonable to expect a teenager to be up and dressed by 9am and helping out at home (gardening, cleaning, ironing etc) if they don't have a job. They should also be looking for work from neighbours such as babysitting, gardening work such as cutting lawns etc if they can't find a traditional summer job.

nickelbabe · 05/07/2011 16:33

of course it's normal!
YABU.

teenagers are just as tired as ladies in early pregnancy (hormones you see).
and yes, they will do the late nights/late mornings, because it suits their bodies to work that way.

Grin
Original poster
ShirlOckholmes · 05/07/2011 17:08

Well, the general concensus seems to be I should leave them if they aren't hurting anyone, which I suppose they are not, though they do leave all the lights on and leave their nocturnal feeding spree mess for me to come down to in the morning.
They do tend to wake DH up when they go to bed but he is a light sleeper and worries they might have left doors/windows unlocked etc!!
They have no plans at all for the summer, which is another problem. They would rather go without things than earn a bit of money and we are exhausted trying to suggest things they might lke to do other than X-box!!
I sometimes wonder whether because they are twins, they always have some company so they are not motivated to get out and meet their mates. Kazzymac do you think that is the case with twins?
Thanks for all the comments. I guess I'll let them sleep and I'm sure it will be worse when they are older and start going clubbing!

OP posts:
kazzymac · 05/07/2011 17:27

In response to ShirlOckhomes, my feeling is that being a twin always means that there is someone else there at 2am to play x box with! Most of the time they get on like mates anyway but doesn't stop them from meeting others. As long as they are quiet at night, they do jobs when asked, get up if needed etc I am going to chill out about it (plus I am at work anyway so no idea what time they are up and about but at least I still get the peaceful mornings!)

Maryz · 05/07/2011 18:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Omigawd · 05/07/2011 19:00

Mine do the same, and so did I - my 16th birthday card from my Dad said "Many are called to greatness - and few get up"

Or something like that.........

FabbyChic · 05/07/2011 19:03

Its normal! My 18 year old is waiting to go to Uni, he goes to sleep around 2 or 3am, gets up around 12.30pm

Nothing wrong with it, doesnt bother me Im at work.

WhereYouLeftIt · 05/07/2011 19:35

A story in the Grauniad here about teenaged sleep patterns

Looks like yours are pretty normal.

Lara2 · 05/07/2011 19:54

YABU - all teenagers do this! I'm lucky if I see mine before 12pm!

I was exactly the same and now I get up at 5am everyday! It won't be forever and it's not harming anyone - time enough in their lives to be adult and responsible.

zebrafinch · 05/07/2011 19:58

DD is 18 finished A levels June plans to get a job. TBH it really gets to me if she stays in bed. When I was growing up if you were still in bed /in your Pjs at noon then the only reason would be that you will feeling poorly. by the time DD is up at 11.59 I have already done 5 hours work. I am really scared that she will be unable to get up for work (if she can find it, its dire around here) , she was often late for school. The rest of the day for her is spent contacting her friends./ watching TV. I have to beg her to walk the dog. Maybe I should chill out most of you other mums seem more tolerant. Will you set a limit on it? will you still be saying they need the rest when 3 months have gone by??

catgirl1976 · 05/07/2011 20:00

God I was never alllowed to do this as a teenager :( my mother was a stickler for us being up before 9am no matter what we had been up to the night before. Probably why I started sleeping with my bf at the time - could get a lie in at his! :)

Original poster
ShirlOckholmes · 05/07/2011 20:16

Okay, I think I'll chill about it. I tried confiscating the x-box controllers last night when I went to bed, but I think they just watched DVD's instead. Twin1 got up at 3.30pm Sad and twin2 got up at 7am because when he checked his clock he thought it was 7 in the evening!! Grin He had his breakfast then went back to bed.

OP posts:
Maryz · 05/07/2011 20:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.