Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask exactly how badly a 3rd dc affects your body? i KNOW, i KNOW its shallow, sorry!

49 replies

superv1xen · 03/07/2011 12:21

and i know everyone will be a bit different, but if i can just get a few honest stories i can weigh the risks up in my mind

me and dh have been considering dc3 for a while now and tbh my broodiness is getting the better of me Blush

but the one thing that is still putting me off (and as i say i am aware of how awfully shallow it is) is what state my body is going to be in afterwards

i am 31 as well and had my other 2 in my 20's so my body is not TOO bad, although i have a bit of a saggy tummy, stretchmarks and my norks are beginning to head sadly south Blush and am starting to notice the odd line on my face. but i look ok in clothes and can still scrub up ok if i make a bit of effort. i am not sure i would look that different if i had never had kids tbh, as, at the age i am at there is bound to be some wear and tear Wink

it would be a planned c/s as i have had the other 2 by that method. and also worrying about how bad a 3rd c/s would be pain wise, recovery time, scar etc, as my 2nd one was worse than the first.

would it REALLY fuck things up if i had a 3rd? and lets face it in a few years everything will go to pot anyway Hmm more dc or no.

and sorry again for the shallowness. i wouldnt dare ask my friends this question as they would think i am a vain twat mad

OP posts:
queenmaeve · 03/07/2011 12:38

Have had 5 dc (4 cs) I think you always will have that bit that sits out because of c section no matter how many sit ups you do, but the rest is all up to the individual really exercise, diet etc. Im 34 and can still wear a bikini but I do work at it.

Glitterknickaz · 03/07/2011 12:40

Despite 3 sections my pelvic floor had it after DD.

WhereTheWildThingsWere · 03/07/2011 12:43

I don't think it is shallow, at the end of the day it was the final reason why I have chosen no to have any more, after ds (at 29) I got myself back together fairly well, but after dd (at 33) it was really hard and their are bits of me I really don't like, I am sure age affects how well you 'bounce back' and I am not prepared to risk doing it again and making even more of a mess of my body, it would make me too unhappy.

Sorry, that probably wasn't what you wanted to hear Grin

RockStockAndTwoOpenBottles · 03/07/2011 12:45

Numbers 3 and 4 for me were EMCS and an ELCS, so apart from slightly hangy bit with the scar no real difference between them and the other two. DS came at 28 weeks so I hadn't actually put much weight on (I was 25/26 when I had him, and with DD3 I put no weight on at all (I was 38) and was about 9 or 10 lbs lighter when she was born. Which was something of a result Grin

But as queenmaeve says, it's really all down to the individual and how much work you put into it - but that's the same whether we're talking babies or not IMO.

GypsyMoth · 03/07/2011 12:47

Well I had 2 in my twenties, 2 in my thirties and 1 in my forties

No nothing with any if them. But I'm fairly fit and sporty, so MIT sure how much of a difference it's made. Also being tall meant more room for babies, so no stretchmarks.

Pelvic floor seems fine so far, youngest is now 3 and he was 10 pounds 3!!

These were all vaginal deliveries with only gas and air, last one born at home.no stitches, so no scar tissue, infections etc

Downside for me though, was HORRIFIC sickness in first 20 weeks. And a bit of SPF with last 2 babies who were both 10 pound plus.

queenmaeve · 03/07/2011 13:50

Tiffany I Felt myself cross my legs there reading about your 10 3 baby! Grin

Adair · 03/07/2011 14:05

I think my body is alright after 3. Boobs seem not too different (ds is 5mths), loads of stretchmarks but then I had those from the first. Tummy pretty flat (no idea how), pelvic floor alright (managed to go all day yesterday without the loo - and held up!).

I have the body of an attractive 30 year old woman IMVHO. And as i am 31, that suits me just fine Grin

Dexifehatz · 03/07/2011 17:15

My body is fucked after three.No pelvic floor muscles left,so wet myself when cough or sneeze.At least 3 stone overweight,legs and arms okay just look 7months pregnant still.Tired and fed up.No social life.No friends.I am depressed and most of the time suicidal.My children keep me here though,they are gorgeous and clever and make me laugh.

quiddity · 03/07/2011 17:29

I had DCs 1 and 2 in my twenties, didn't put on much weight, no stretch marks, was back to normal size within weeks or even days.
With DD, at 38, I was much bigger while pregnant, got stretchmarks, and took a year to lose the extra weight afterwards, to my absolute horror. The actual birth wasn't any harder than the first two, all went well.
Dexifehatz, sorry to hear how you're feeling. Are you getting help?

NormanTebbit · 03/07/2011 17:34

I've had three sections. tummy criss crossed with stretchmarks etc

Frankly op I would be first thinking, can you handle more sleepless nights (DD3 has aged me beyond belief) and can your bank balance take it?

Fernier · 03/07/2011 17:37

I have not had a cesearean so cant comment on that but with my four (all born in my twenties though) the damage was done with the first, no new stretch marks with any of the others, only thing which has been different after dc4 was i had a small tear for the first time although luckily no stitches and it took about two months to feel comfortable again.

lazylula · 03/07/2011 17:39

I had dd 8 weeks ago by planned c section, my 3rd section and I have to be honest, it was my worst pain wise and recovering. Having said that, I think I was lucky with my first 2 as I had very little pain after the first day or so. I have a muffin top now, but that is more to do with the fact that dd was an up the front bump, where as ds' were kind of all round. I lost 3 and a half stone before that pregnancy, I am back to ww to lose the 1 and a half I have gained in a weeks time. I wouldn't be without her though, my family is complete now. I was also warned by the surgeon that the lining of my womb is very thin so he advised sorting some good contraception!

Catslikehats · 03/07/2011 17:46

2 DC's in 20's, 2 in my 30's.

It was no 1 that did the damage - nothing serious but boobs less firm; some stretch marks on tummy; definitely less tight

I suppose I have got a little saggier after each baby, but maybe that is just age. I am 34, youngest is 4mths and I can still rock a bikini (although maybe not in quite the same way I could when I was 19!)

And TBH I get so much credit for having had four kids that it more than cancels out that extra sag Grin

Catslikehats · 03/07/2011 17:47

Dexie hope things get better for you.

CheeseandGherkins · 03/07/2011 17:55

I'm 32 and recently had my 4th, all vaginal deliveries. My body hasn't changed. I'm a size 8. Lost a good half a stone after having my last in December though (for other reasons, namely her being stillborn). I don't put on much weight during pregnancy anyway. The only stretchmarks I have are a few on the underside of my breasts.

cybboid · 03/07/2011 17:55

I sprouted varicose veins EVERYWHERE whilst preggers with my 3rd. Wrecked my (really good) legs, and my 'special place'

spookshowangel · 03/07/2011 18:01

i had 1 in my teens and 2 in my 20's everything fine except stretch marks and the smiley belly but that happened after the first. i am now prego with my fourth and am 29 so am wondering my self how my body will spring back since my last one was when i was 26. but no probs pelvic wise or vag wise so am keeping up with the pelvic floors which i have been doing since i was 14 and will encourage both my daughters to do after hearing some of the stories on here.

spookshowangel · 03/07/2011 18:04

should say the jump from 2 to 3 is a big adjustment though nothing to do with your body.

skybluepearl · 03/07/2011 18:28

just took me a little whil;e longer to loose weight after 3rd

Original poster
superv1xen · 04/07/2011 10:15

glitterknickaz your reply was the most worrying!!

i can deal with more stretchmarks, even saggier norks but what do you mean, your pelvic floor has "had it" after DC3 ? Shock are you serious? how can that be if you have only had cs's?

after my pregnancies my fanjo's the only thing on my body thats still tight, (i thought, due to the caesareans) i REALLY don't want to lose that :o

OP posts:
Playdohinthewashingmachine · 04/07/2011 10:25

Dc3 took my womb with him on his way out ...

Actually, that part isn't too bad (no periods, no smears) but I do have a glorious vertical scar and no belly button, which is a bit weird.

mo3d · 04/07/2011 10:32

I have 3 children and my body is no different after the 3rd as it was after the 2nd. Boobs a bit saggier but pelvic floor ok.

I had my first 2 in my 20s and my 3rd when I was 32. So very similar to you.

If you are broody, I think you should go for it! What will you regret more in 10 years time? Having saggier boobs or not have a 3rd child?

Original poster
superv1xen · 04/07/2011 10:43

exactly! thats what i mean, in ten years time everything will be saggier, wrinklier etc anyway. and i would like to think that i won't care as much then anyway :(

i really wish i didn't care so much now, so much of my time is spent "preening" and dieting and exercising in a vain attempt to look good. i have a mate who is a similar age to me, she has just had her 4th DC, she is fatter than me, looks older (i don't mean this horrible) but she is just soooooo happy and contented and so is her DH, she just does not care about stuff like i do. i wish i could be more like her.

OP posts:
Original poster
superv1xen · 05/07/2011 09:52

just wanted to bump to see if i could get a few more replies :)

OP posts:
Insomnia11 · 05/07/2011 10:12

Well after having two children, I wouldn't say pregnancy or birth itself has had much effect on my body.

It's the completely different lifestyle and having 500 more things to think about each day than before that has had an effect. I tend to comfort eat as a coping mechanism and don't have as much time to exercise or feel too tired from lack of sleep either due to stress or kids causing me sleep deprivation. My metabolism has definitely got slower with age and less exercise.

If I had three kids it would be like this + 50% worse I think. It's more my mental health I'd worry about, though this would have an impact physically as well.