to think that this is a pretty shocking school dinner?

[anchovies]

Today my boys had Caribbean style chicken with spaghetti hoops and garden peas. Pink sponge and custard. Strawberry milkshake.

£1.90 a day.

Thought there must have been some sort of mistake but have just checked the published menus and that is what they had planned for today. Only other main meal was the vegetarian option which they are not allowed (again with peas and spaghetti hoops.) Could have chosen fruit for dessert.

Mentioned it earlier to my neighbour who also has children who have school dinners and she thought it was fine as "the carbohydrate is in the spaghetti hoops".

Wrote (yet another) email to our local council but am now thinking I may be wrong?

Ime of school dinners, what it sounds like on the menu and what it actually is like are sometimes rather different.

But they do all sound amazing compared with the crap that was dished out to us during school dinners at primary school in 1980. I remember the burger that stayed stuck on the hall ceiling for weeks after my classmate Warren chucked it up there. Almost as though it had a will of its own.

The OP's meal sounds a bit sugary and oddly mixed up but pretty much OK. And I don't think 1.90's that much to be paying for that. Agree about the rice though. Healthier and cheaper... maybe they had a bunch of stuff to use up.

Nothing to with superiority at all. I actually don't care what people feed their children and if they are happy to allow them to consume lots of sugar everyday then so be it. What I dislike is misinformation such as it being needed as a source of carbohydrates/fats/for energy etc. It is not needed for any of that. I also dislike the idea that it is weird or obsessive to provide a healthy diet for your child that does not include those things or that only those types of food are enjoyable and children would 'miss out' by not having them.

But it is equally not weird nor neglective, as some would have us believe, to allow children to have a dessert after their lunch at school and to not obsess over each meal their child has.

"I also dislike the idea that it is weird or obsessive to provide a healthy diet for your child that does not include those things or that only those types of food are enjoyable and children would 'miss out' by not having them."

Who is this all for exactly - the kids?

Eh?

No one needs cake, but life without sugary delights - unthinkable! It's not about healthy food necessarily it's more a healthy attitude to food. A square of pink sponge once a week is not going to lead to weight/health problems.

I need cake

The problem is, if you don't let them taste these things and have food in moderation they will come across it eventually.

I went to pick up my DN and two of his pals with SIL from a party, the parent had put on a spread that okay, was a bit unbalanced (i would, for example, put crudites and not 5 varieties of crisps, homemade cakes and fruit pieces if I could and not bags of Haribo in a bowl) but hey, her kids party, her choice.

The pals were a couple of kids from the village, brother and sister that live to a very strict vegan healthy diet. They eat no processed sugary treats or "bad" foods, only drink water etc. When we got there, the other kids and DN were playing and the older boy of the siblings was literally forcing whole Cadbury mini rolls into his mouth one after the other. The other parents didn't really know what to do. In the car his younger sister asked us not to tell mum that she'd had squash and sweets as she'd be disappointed with her, and she was afraid she wouldn't go to her other friends parties.

We both felt absolutely awful, I could totally sympathise with her after my diet as a kid. I wouldn't want my son to behave like that, by demonising food that he will come across eventually.

"The pals were a couple of kids from the village, brother and sister that live to a very strict vegan healthy diet. They eat no processed sugary treats or "bad" foods, only drink water etc. When we got there, the other kids and DN were playing and the older boy of the siblings was literally forcing whole Cadbury mini rolls into his mouth one after the other. The other parents didn't really know what to do. In the car his younger sister asked us not to tell mum that she'd had squash and sweets as she'd be disappointed with her, and she was afraid she wouldn't go to her other friends parties."

The kids used to come home with stories about similar kids at school ogling their Penguin bars and virtually begging for a bite :(

This sort of stuff isn't done for the kids' health, clearly.....

A friend once said to me "no one wants their child to be the one at the party with the bag of carrot sticks"...a fine sentiment. Why deprive children of certain foods? That's where food issues and eating disorders can stem from. Children who are not 'allowed' sugar, fat etc tend to gorge on it when the opportunity arises.

And the 'forbidden fruit' argument rears it's head again. Sigh... Very few people would object to cake at a party or every so often. Objecting to having it after lunch everyday with custard and sugary milk is not the same as forbidding it outright. Why do you need to expose them early to it to prevent them gorging anyway? Is there a cut off point? Should I start plying my 5 yo with alcohol so he doesn't binge when he's older?

bubblemummy give him some crack cocaine too just to be safe.

Well it works for the Italians!

Have to say that my experience with my kids at parties is completely different. They won't touch the haribo crap and they don't like squash (they do drink fruit juice at home - not always water). They'll have a few crisps, sandwiches, veggies, fruit and some cake which they usually choose to bring home with them because they're full. Perhaps those children stuffing themselves are simply greedy/hungry? The ones I see gorging themselves aren't denied anything at home so there goes your theory if we're basing all this on anecdotes.

You sound so perfect, Bubbleymummy. Dedicated to the health of your children, yet not averse to sensible treats. Like a modern-day Mary Poppins.

Oh dear bubbleymummy
You're a wonderful, perfect example of motherhood and I bow before your superior feeding regimes. Get over yourself love.

Hardly a theory when a 5 year old girl asks you to lie to her mum is it?

And yes you are completely correct, most kids take a few bits and pieces, my son's pals went mad for the chicken goujons at his party, and the strawberries. These kids, however, really didn't.

It was one real life example that I took some experience from. The other, was my own upbringing and the enforced relationship with food my mother imposed on me, and my eating habits when I left home for Uni.

No one actually stated it was pink custard and sponge every day either did they?

bubbleymummy - no to alcohol to a 5yo of bloody course not. However introducing teenagers to wine with meals before they hit friday night binges certainly has a rational strategy behind it.
Do you also spy on your kids at parties through the window?! How the hell do you know what they eat in such detail when at said parties?

Doctors call it 'museli belt malnutrition' when kids are underfed because their parents are applying healthy eating principles meant for adults to children. Children need different proportions of fat in their diet to adults. Because they are growing.

And any qualified dietitian will tell you it's a mistake to label some foods as 'bad' and some as 'good'. Better to talk about foods that are occasional treats and those that you should eat plenty of. And to recognise that some people have particular needs - the right diet for an individual child who has ASD or autism might be different to the right diet for the majority of people the same age.

People need a balanced diet. Going overboard because a child has sponge pudding one day of the week denotes a lack of perspective.

I was always given unlimited cakes, biscuits, snacks - on top of healthy home-cooked main meals - as were my siblings. All of us are slim and have no food issues I'm aware of. I do still love chocolate though (and cakes/biscuits to a lesser degree) and enjoy eating them. So I make no attempt to deprive my kids of these or I'd be, frankly, a hypocrite.

I also love mushrooms, spinach, goat's cheese, cashew nuts, avocados, bananas, berries, roast dinners... etc. I hope my kids genuinely enjoy the food I give them (not just the sweet 'treats' - to me all sports of food can be and are 'treats') and that it contributes to their enjoyment of life in general, as well as to their nutrititional intake.

Eating a meal should, ideally, be about more than just sating an age or refuelling. It should be a pleasant and enjoyable part of life; maybe a chance to share. A pleasure for the palate.

Admitted;ly, spaghetti hoops don't thrill my palate much. But then I'm not a small child.

Anything in moderation. (Especially pink food colouring.) But assuming this isn't their main meal EVERY day, then YABU.

cake is nice. Normal people like cake. It doesn't need to be broccoli to be good fro you in a differnt way.

Good post edam

I haven't read the whole thread so apologies if I am repeating what someone else has said.

Has it been mentioned that some children struggle massively to maintain a healthy body weight and don't have the capacity to eat enough food to do so unless some food they eat is very high calorie and high fat food.

Obviously, in a perfect world this is not ideal but the world is not perfect.

My ds is weighed regularly due to his low weight and slow growth. We have to pack the calories into him to maintain the weight he has. He could not eat enough fruit and salad to do this as, although he enjoys these foods and eats them regularly, he needs more calories.

He also has a friend in his class who has cystic fibrosis (sp?) One result of her condition is that she cannot digest all the calories from her food. She takes medicine to help her with this but she still has to eat a very high calorie diet.

Schools have to cater for all sorts of conditions and problems.

The healthy choices were there as well so those without the need for a high calorie intake were catered for too. There is only so much they can do.

oh get over yourself OP. Ok it's not sushi and soya beans but it's hardly arsenic is it? If you don't like the menu provide a packed lunch or be home to provide a home lunch.
It won't kill you precious baby to eat some crap now and again

Wow - does feeding your child a healthy diet make you a perfect mother? I had no idea it was so easy

"Do you also spy on your kids at parties through the window?! How the hell do you know what they eat in such detail when at said parties?"

Nope, they're 5 and 2 and the first party where some of the parents decided to leave was last month. They sit at the table and help themselves to what they want and then give me any bits they want to bring home for later.

"Doctors call it 'museli belt malnutrition' when kids are underfed because their parents are applying healthy eating principles meant for adults to children. Children need different proportions of fat in their diet to adults. Because they are growing."

Right....because cake is the only source of fat in a child's diet Unless I feed my children cake and chocolate they will waste away to nothing. The fact that they eat full fat yoghurt, cheese, butter, nuts, avocados, olives etc doesn't come into play at all.

Just to repeat - not complaining about the occasional piece of cake or ice cream - just pudding everyday with custard/cream/sugary flavoured drinks.