to have mentioned my wedding anniversary when I noticed woman in shop looking for my wedding ring...

[BooBearBoo]

Pushing DS around a shop when shop lady starting commenting on him "ahh he is lovely" etc etc blah blah. I then noticed her clocking my lack of wedding ring (left them at home - very muggy here and my hands always swell up in heat). I felt compelled to mention that I was looking for a gift for my DH for our anniversary tomorrow...

Was I right to feel the need to point this out??!

When I was pregnant I once sat opposite two nuns on the tube (again not wearing my rings...). Goodness me I wanted to smack their disapproving faces. I do look very young as well. Gggrrrr. I'm not even bloody religious. Why do I care that other people care if I am not married??!!

"Why do I care that other people care if I am not married??!!"

Mostly, they don't care. Loads of people don't wear rings (I frequently don't), it's not so 'compulsory' /badge of pride as it used to be, so I believe few people would make the assumption no ring=unmarried.

But that still leaves us with you caring about how you are perceived. Have you experienced something horrible in the past because someone judged you (unfairly) and found you wanting (unfairly)?

Most of my son's friends have parents who are unmarried, and though I'm divorced now, when my son was at primary school I was one of the few married parents. My sister's daughter is 25 and even then being an unmarried mother was normal.
I also think you're being a bit paranoid OP, I'm sure no one was looking at your hands.

Ladies of the cloth are married to the baby Jesus.

I think we're under invasion again.

You should try getting sneering disapproval every day. Soon get a thick skin.

I am married and I don't have a wedding ring. I am looking forward to a special place in hell

im quite young looking been with DP forever and have DD plus a DS on the way, we're engaged but havent got round to rings yet but i do this so often!! just drop it in like ''yeah cant believe we've been together so long and never ot round to rings blah blah'' its worse when ive no make up on and dressed casual for some reason ppl think im about 17, with a 6 yr old DD and a bump!! the looks i attract..

And may I add I am unfailingly polite to members of the clergy, though I must admit I've never actually spoken to a nun, and have no contact at all with vicars.
So there's time yet.

This thread is nuts. My mum wears a wedding right (left hand) and it didn't stop the vicar guy at Kings' College Cambridge asking her if she were a plain-clothes nun when she tried to go in along with another more classically dressed nun.

See, it's the nunnery, not th babies, you should worry about.

Heaven is probably well boring.

I never get why people care abut being seen as mothers in absence of a ring... who cares? there are plenty of couples who are not married and they are every way as committed as those who are.

There are a lot of us who are no longer married, due to divorce or death, we don't think people cares whether we are wearing rings or not.

Why do you care so much? I think you care more about the lack of rings than the nuns in the tube or the person who was saying your child was lovely.

It is not the 1950s any more you know?

I want to be a plains-clothe nun. Right now.

On another note, the best nuns I ever saw were in Poland (they know how to do clergy there). We were in a horse-drawn sleigh driven by a horribly drunk man who thought I was the grandmother of the party (bastard), and as we rounded the snowy wastes of the high mountain en route to the frozen lake, we passed a party of Snow Nuns, clad in white from head to foot, marching through the snow while gently flagellating themselves with their little flagellators.

It was magnificent. My Polish friend got them to pose in a pic with us that I treasure to this day.

"I want to be a plains-clothe nun. Right now."

Me too... could you imagine being able to spend a lifetime doing shores, without hearing the word "MUUUUUUUUMMMMMMM!!!!!!" every 20 seconds?

Heaven.

"doing shores" does that mean checking out beaches? I'm in.

I've honestly never noticed anyone looking for rings. In years and years. We're getting married next month, I wonder if I'll be treated to a new degree of respect. I doubt it.

... and perhaps I would get some nice spelling classes thrown in when I'm not doing shores but walking around the chores for contemplative business.

Im thinking of having a shotgun wedding!

This thread is bonkers - and not just because of the nuns. rings mean jack shit and if anybody started checking my hands out, I'd just tell them proudly: "I'm not married, but I'm a fucking brilliant mum and so is my DP. Well, he's a dad I mean. Etc"

I work opposite a nunnery. I see nuns all the time.

Actually there is a window opposite my window which must be one of the nun's bathrooms. This is no word of a lie - I often have to avert my gaze to avoid looking at a pair of swinging nun's breasts while she brushes her teeth. You're not going to believe me are you . It is true.

... I think if somebody checked my hands I would be wondering if I had my nails in bad shape rather than in showing of my status..

Re the rings - yes I know I am perhaps being paranoid. Probably me that has the issue and not others. I don't want people to think I am not married but I am an athiest

Beer

Are we talking about nuns tits now?

Well, my goodness.

SNOW NUNS sound amazing.