To think there should be seperate playgroups for people like this?

[MumblingRagDoll]

I am talking about people who feel the need to SHOUT every flipping sentence when talking to their DC? I went to ours this morning and as usual there were umpteen women who couldn't speak at a normal level...

"FREDDY! WOULD YOU LIKE A BICUIT DARLING???"

"HARRY! LOOK! LOOK AT THE TRAIN!!"

"OOOOOOOHHHHH CHARLOTTE! WHAT A BEAUTIFUL ANENOME YOU'VE DRAWN!!!! THAT IS AN ANENOME! AN-EN-O-ME"

I wanted to say "NO! BODEN-CLAD WOMAN...

IT IS AN ANEMONE...AN-EM-O.NE!"

The kids are all like this and they play quietly and well...it's just these bloody loud women who swan....and stalk and dash importantly about the rooms like they own them! I want a playgroup where people talk normally!

WHY? Why do they do this??? They also look like this all the time...never budge it..."Oooh...no Chloe! Don't push Harriet! She was on the train first

Have they all had lobotomies? Do they feel NOTHING but for and hour and a half? Really?

Is nobody on here going to admit to doing it themselves?

that'll be me.

have a weeny non excuse.(but,but,but,but)ds1 was very delayed at talking so speech therapist said lots of convo,talk about everything.hes now 10.now i sometimes do it just to get them all to shut the feck up and get on

@cheesesarnie. I loved that, i might try it!

I only attend the type of play groups that allow the parents to have HOT drinks and biscuits. The mums all stand at one end munching away and slurping tea chatting and the kids rampage around the church hall. Strictly no braying allowed!

Ah...fair enough Cheese! BUt these women can't all have the same reasons as you....they're just bloody show offs!

We're all allowed hot drinks and cheapo biccies though gapants....they still bray though!

no,theyre silly excuses!

ds2 is speech delayed but i were to start shout-talking at him he'd just start screaming back at me so it would likely end very badly for all concerned

I've recently started taking a book or newspaper to playgroups. As a result I am much more enthusiastic about them. Try it!

Why stop at playgroups?

I do it

but I'm the antithesis of Bodenmum.

DS2 is autistic, with GDD and severe speech and language delays. I have to project my voice and over-enunciate, as he's in his own little word most of the time.

I'm usually shouting "OI! DS! HANDS OUT OF YOUR NAPPY! BINS DO NOT CONTAIN TASTY TREATS! DO NOT LICK THE SLIDE!"

Interesting, i would have though there would have been too much of the

"'STAY THERE PLEASE CECILY, THERE IS A LADY WITH A HOT DRINK, NOW NOT TO CLOSE OR YOU MIGHT GET SCALDED.THATS RIGHT DARLING, HOT DRINKS ARE A DANGER WHEN LITTLE POPPETS ARE PLAYING"

Quite the opposite gapants they are all really keen to show how relaxed tHey are....

"THAT'S RIGHT CECILY! JUMP OFF THE TOP OF THE STAIRCASE! YOU CAN DO IT! YOU CAN DO ANYTHING!!"

at "Bins do not contain tasty treats"

i think bins are quite tasty.

I want to come to your play group, sounds very entertaining! braying mums with a competitive attitude. Excellent!

I probably have done this in the past but not in boden-y way, more in a i've-not-got-a-frickin-clue-and-someone-told-me-to-talk-to-ds-a-lot-way

I'm afraid I do it in the supermarket if DD is tearing around and I want people to know I'm not the sort of lazy parent who lets their child loose in a supermarket and when I sense an impending dirty look from an old lady (not prejorative, old people are in plentiful supply where I live) I tend to:

"COME HERE SILLYBILLY, IF YOU RUN AROUND LIKE THAT YOU MIGHT GET BUMPED."

In my head I'm shrieking "For fuck's sake, DD, stand still and stop pissing about". That is why they do it. In their heads they're going crazy.

It's why the smile is fixed.

shall we all gatecrash the baby groupand really over bray!

yeah, I was a bit like this too, Cognitive Dissident as my DS had severe receptive language delay - so a lot of energetic emphatic repetitive speech too, sorry! I mentally term it the "Mommy" voice - ie US style speech therapy style.

I parent loudly. They don't seem to listen at normal level. Actually, I don't think they listen at LOUD LEVEL either, but at least everyone around me can see I am putting in the effort.

Course DS is also partially deaf so it helps to stand on his good side and screech a lot, otherwise he just hears "yes go ahead and do whatever you like darling son, mummy is only here to look harassed and haggard pretty".

What's an anemone?

Alpha Mums ? Haha, I'm a Zeta Mum. But I'm a Zeta Mum who would fight an express train to protect my kids.

Please do chesse it would be so funny...people from MN would have the best responses!

Summer But I do that! That's not the same...that is not "display parenting" it's "Indicative parenting" where you indicate that you are aware that your child is being silly/dangerous/a pita and you are apologising for it in a roundabout way.
An Anemone is a flower possum many people mistakenly say aneNome when they mean aneMone

The only Loud Parent I've seen at playgroup is Loud Grandad.

He kind of stands in the middle of the room directing his grandkids playing. Telling them what to play with etc.

The rest of us sit on the sidelines with a brew and biscuits, thankful for an hours peace while the childebeest run riot.

DH and I refer to them as the GOOD SHARING, MAX! mummies.

We are LITTLE GIRLS SHOULDN'T SAY FUCK parents