...to ask our childminder to abide by some basic TV guidelines?

[monkeymiss]

eg just cbeebies and age-appropriate DVDs (eg Peppa Pig). No films or Internet, and no more than 30 minutes a day?

DD is 3.

There have been a few things recently that I would not have been happy for her to watch.

I subsequently asked CM verbally first if she would restrict telly watching to cbeebies, but CM explained they had current issues with Sky. So I put a note in the diary but she has taken offence and says I should trust her judgements.

I appreciate where she is coming from, but we are DD's parents.

Further twist... now going very off topic so I shall start a new discussion!

Just to bridge, having read the subsequent posts earlier I had a rethink and thought maybe I should try to come to an agreement with CM on a TV policy, as this dispute between us isn't fair on DD.

DD was due to go to CM today but I let her know last night that I didn't need childcare today. I rang her at home but there was no answer so I had to send her a text. CM texted back later today asking whether DD was ill. I said that she was fine, but that I didn't feel comfortable sending her today after our conversation on Tuesday night. She replied saying that it is probably best to terminate our agreement. I texted tonight to say that I had written her notice last night but thought to try again to resolve things between us for DD's sake. , but as she did not appear to value our business I would take it elsewhere and post the notice tonight.

But thinking about it I'm not sure who is giving notice to whom and how this will affect whether CM should still take her (is it unfair on DD just to stop with no notice?) and the final bill.

Will start new thread soon but just have to nip off for a bit...

Now asking MNers for further advice here.

Thanks so much everyone.

I think YABU, a child minder generally charges less money then a nursery and the point is it is like being at home. And it is the child minder's home, she hasn't been dishonest about what is being watched so it is up to you to suck it up or find someone new

While I think it's perfectly reasonable for you to expect the cm to try and follow your requests I have to ask one thing..you font think films are suitable for a 3yo? Really? All films?! Why? You say that you don't think a 3yo could follow / understand the plot. I disagree and, even if they can't capture all the thematic nuances of a film, they can still enjoy it. I remember dd1 being entranced by Beauty and the Beast at that age.

This is a genuine question btw

The point about a CM being like a home is worth considering when you weigh different types of childcare. It is fair to expect a CM environment to be like a home where there are older siblings. Which means that while no inappropriate or very scary material should be shown (older siblings have to learn to consider younger siblings), there is no reason why everything that happens should be geared to the abilities of any one child: children with older siblings learn that sometimes they have to tag along or try things they don't understand, and this is generally considered good for them. Incidentally, this is why many parents prefer childminders to nurseries because you can get this additional older sibling effect and they want their children to benefit from this. That was certainly a big factor influencing me.

But if it's not your cup of tea, consider something else.

In any case, I would be concerned about a CM who openly claimed that she finds it difficult to know what to do with her charges: the ones I have had to do with have been full of ideas and always happy to talk about them. Watching films has had a place, but only as part of a very full programme.

Personally, I always preferred dcs watching dvds (which the CM or I could vet beforehand) to childrens' programmes.

I am a CM... have answered on your other thread OP.

Re TV... I have a No TV Policy in my setting, I cater for under 3s. I do plenty with them and don't personally find it necessary to pop the TV on. If I had older children I might consider half an hour after homework, whilst waiting to be collected.

That's how I do things... but each CM is different and has their own TV policy, so it's crucial you inquire what it is prior to signing a contract. There is no right or wrong per say (No TV vs a little TV), as long as you as the parent, and your CM are on the same page regards TV.

TV is one of those delicate issues: I can see her point in a way, in that its quite difficult to stick to the only CBeebies rule but I do think ultimately your wishes should be respected and as she isn't doing that on something as simple as this then you have to ask yourself what else she is ignoring.