In thinking people should educate themselves and use a bit of common sense instead of asking silly, questions about SN on here?

[ApocalypseCheeseToastie]

ASD s a huge spectrum, my dd is fairly well behaved and has never been violent, however she has huge meltdowns when she gets stressed.

OTOH my son can become violent (towards me) has no sense of danger, paces and runs away when stressed..... yet doesn't have the massive screaming meltdowns his sister has. Having said all that, when they're ASD is taken into consideration and handled properly they're better behaved than a lot of NT kids I see, and i'm proud of them both.

At the other end of the scale my niece is the most severely affected child I have ever met, she is non verbal and constantly bouncing/violent towards her carers, she wasn't always like this, her epilepsy meds have a lot to answer for. Ah well, guess that's her future mapped behind a load of trees I suppose, can't have her spoiling anyones coffee mornings.

If people are so interested in kids/adults with SN they can educate themselves by picking up a book or volunteering at a respite centre, something of that ilk. I really can't be arsed with 'educating the masses' or 'opening eyes'. I don't see it as my calling, the new Mumsnet mantra should be don't be a twat, and think before you judge. Job done, and many aching fingers saved.

And please, can we ignore the constant twattery threads ? We are just as bad for giving them the attention they crave, report and ignore is the new LBD in my opinion.

But you didn't 'suggest' it - you told people not to do it and told them to educate themselves. Everyone could have the sense of entitlement you think you have. People are likewise entitled to ask questions.

I agreee that the nasty threads are horrendous and should be deleted. However, I don't think people should be frightened to ask genuine questions if they are in the process of getting a diagnosis or want some help.

I will go for tht Maeio. Dd for a week. And all her equipment. You can even have her dla as people seem to think its free money.

DS could hit multiple targets for many posters, AS, male and a teenager.

It would enable me to answer that sweet little thread asking 'what is your child doing in the break after GCSEs?'

Oh yes - they will need the DLA for DS's Speech therapy, expensive diet, SN preschool and nappies, actually they will probably find they come out at loss after the week - we do!

volunteer at a respite centre? Thats your suggestion for people who want to genuinely learn?
Not sure you've thought that through, to be honest.

RichTea absoluely which is why in site stuff we ahev been trying to get gretaer deletion and protection systems, largely unsuccessfully

Some people who have sn children might like to talk about it on here. I don't usually involve myself on sn threads but wanted to say surely anyone is able to start a thread or ask a question. If it is not to a member's liking then hide the thread or ignore, surely?
If there was a thread that I didn't like then that is what I would do.

From what I've seen, people who post in AIBU who aren't well-informed or interested in specific issues tend to stay on AIBU and not post in those specific questions. I would have thought it was obvious therefore, if you don't want responses from those who don't know enough about the subject, to keep SN subjects in their own section, not put them on AIBU.

Your post is irritating, OP, you don't own the boards and have no right to tell people where or what they can post. Use your own brilliant logic and have a word with your commonsense, perhaps?

As a long term poster before the twat brigade (check out RObF people) came nobody minded

it is the abuse pople loathe

So would you tell someone faced with rtacial abuse to just hide a thread?

Mostly genuine questions are fine but tehya re red flags to twattery

Nice Lying, segregation.

Poeple respond to Sn q's in here from not SN people; heck, SN is sign in so some people miss it's existence compeltely.

I am torn.

I did not chose to become a DR or a Teacher. I have not chosen a life of education. I come on MN as a mother not an authority on ASD or ADHD.
ASD/ADHD enters every single moment of my RL world. I come on MN for a bit of escapism.

I don't want to field ignorant questions from trolls who simply want to coax information for some thinly veiled attacks on the disabled or "benefit scroungers"

However, I am happy to support people going through Dx, I am happy to help those who genuinely want to learn more about something from the people it affects, not the tabloids deeply offensive take on it.

The problem is not those who are ignorant of something that has never effected them. It is the posters who are deliberately vile and have put us all on edge to the merest mention of our Childrens SN.

we don't need people to stop asking questions, we need MNHQ to be tougher on trolls

If I trooped to the library or did voluntary work in the field of whatever I was curious about learning more, I'd never do anything else.

If you do not have a child on the autistic spectrum, why would you spend half your time reasearching the disorder? What about Down's, or ADHD, or bipolar disorder, or epilepsy, or narcolepsy, or tourettes syndrome etc? All worthy of reasearch, all things which parents may feel they are judged on to one degree or another. Asking questions of people who have actual experience in any of those things can be much more informative and easier to relate to than a textbook definition, abd therefore more valuable in educating those who may judge otherwise.

If you don't want to do that, just don't. I am not sure you needed to announce it, and lump the rest of MN in as well.

we don't need people to stop asking questions, we need MNHQ to be tougher on trolls

yepp and not just de;leting posts by you that name known trolls (I take it that was why?)

Listen to yourself, lying.

"keep SN subjects in their own section, not put them on AIBU."

I'm sure you didn't mean that to come across quite as it sounds, or at least I hope you didn't.

I don't mind any one asking me a genuine question, I am proud of my dd and love talking about here, but I won't post on threads where their are trolls, I won't share by beautiful girl when these people are about, IMO mn hq need to deal with the trolls(yep I have one in mind) and not let them cause shit like they did before acting.
then perhaps people like me will feel safer to share.

It's not about segregation it's about commonsense. Everybody here seems to pride themselves on being able to spot a 'troll'. What they don't seem to manage quite so well is to quietly report it and ignore it until it's removed.

I get heartily sick, not considering myself as a troll, to ask a question about something that I don't know much about in practice only to find OP's like this who expect some kind of research to be carried out. The people I've asked a question of have either kindly answered it or ignored me. I'm happy with both actions but I don't expect some kind of lecture as the OP has delivered.

If it's truly about removal of trolls then act like it, follow the procedure. If it's about non-trolls who are asking questions you don't want to answer then think before posting it on a non-specific part of the board as AIBU is. This is not a difficult concept.

I have an uncomplicated approach, I answer questions that are asked nicely and stomp and squish if I think that the questioner is being spiteful, bigoted or has a nasty agenda.
If I get it wrong, I will apologise, but I'm happy that some people are seeing weird stuff and asking 'why?' rather than panicking and attacking or shunning.
However, that's a personal response, and I am an educator and teacher. Others are perfectly entitled to respond to a question with a 'fuck off and stop staring' if that's how they feel their child and their disability is being treated.
I got flamed on the feminist boards for asking question and thinking that education should be a useful part of their discussions, and I thought about it and could see their point. So it has to be an individual response.

EllenJane... I think I've explained in my last post. I was responding to the OP's 'complaints' rather than anyone else. No, I didn't intend it the way you've read it.

I ahve been reporting; posts remain, Its really ahrd to get posts deleted on here.

but if you didn;t like the OP why didn;t YOU hide?

I take your point Lying, but when you see posters who are consitently posting offensive posts and despite reporting them they are still here you lose patience.
You become guarded.

You may not suspect an OP of being a troll but you don't want to answer those basic questions because you know that the thread will be enticing to the trolls. You know that sooner or later they will be along telling youthat your child should have been aborted or locked away in a home. That you are inventing their condition so that you can claim DLA and free cars.

When it is the odd extreme case you can get past that. but when it is sustained over a period of weeks and although the poster is bought to HQ's attention they remain here, posting and yet you have your own posts deleted for possibly offending the troll......well soon enough you lose your ability to give benefit of the doubt. You become closed and you are unwilling to share your experiences, you don't want to lay not only your life but the life of your child, bare for these trolls to come and pick over.

It is a crying shame that this minority will have inevitably ruined the amazingly informative place SN is for teh majority.
MNSN was the reason i found MN, it is the reason I stayed. I found out far more about my Ds through the posts of people like Davros, jimjams and the rest than i ever did from CAHMS or Ed Psych. I feel sad that parents who are a few years later down the line than i am will miss out on that because of a few ignorant bastards.

But we are mothers, not disability rights campaigners. We have better things to be doing with our time than fielding ignorant rantings from fuckwits

genuine questions/genuine personal worries absolutely fine. it's the threads with abusive posts - anti-inclusion, benefits bashing etc where "education" can be a somewhat painful experience for parents/carers/people with disability.

And in some instances, google (or relevant support group sites) can be your friend when you are curious about a condition someone has mentioned on here, but it isn't something affecting your or your nearest/dearest or in need of the more personal touch iyswim.

Of course people won't always want to answer questions and of course it's daft to expect anyone on here to take responsibility for educating others, whatever the topic. But it is often only easy to research something through books if you already know the answer is out there. I have read up a fair amount on some issues and still had never come across a particular area of literature until I got chatting to Altinkum and she made me aware of a set of difficulties I'd never known existed. It happens. You can't go away and learn about something you didn't know existed.

It also doesn't help that when you do report people or threads you are told that the thread will stand so that the people on it can be educated.

Mumsnet prides itself on being "a place to help parents" well i can assure you that i don't feel supported in my parenting by being told my sons condition is a lie and that i am a shitty parent who is trying to get free money.

Rather than back us up they tell us that we should go out and try to engage with these fuckwits.

then they wonder why we get so angry