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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

12.30 am on a maternity ward

84 replies

Justfeckingdoit · 03/06/2011 00:43

Girl opposite is on her mobile loudly about some utterly random shit.

She is keeping everyone awake.

Aibu to be the ward hero and tell her to shut up, Or do I keep quiet and fume like everyone else is?

OP posts:
SingingSands · 03/06/2011 00:45

Tell her in a polite manner if she could take her call elsewhere or wind it up. If she declines throw a monumental wobbler and blame it on the hormones!

MAternity wards are not fun, you have my sympathy (and congratulations?!)

BecauseImWorthIt · 03/06/2011 00:48

Go and ask the nurses to talk to her.

They usually turn all the lights off at around 10/10.30, and so expect you to be quiet, if not asleep by then.

Only if the nurses won't do it, then ask her to be quiet.

lilolilmanchester · 03/06/2011 00:51

ask her politely, if that doesn't work, ring for a member of staff, who won't be best pleased (with the situation, not you)as they have better things to be doing. Awful places for getting sleep, hope you manage to get some peace soon

AgentZigzag · 03/06/2011 00:51

I had this the night I'd had DD2, two in the morning and the woman in the next bed chatting away to every family member she knew at a two in the afternoon volume Angry

Oh I was pissed off, and just lay there fuming like you are now.

I tried to channel the MN force and think she's probably excited and didn't notice her loudmouthness, or she was maybe lonely and a bit scared and needed contact with the normal world.

Not bloody easy though!

Are congrats in order for you justfecking? Or are you waiting on a Small One putting in an appearance?

Glitterknickaz · 03/06/2011 00:56

Ohhh tell her to STFU

AgentZigzag · 03/06/2011 01:04

You'd probably get a round of applause if you did tell her to STFU Grin

Glitterknickaz · 03/06/2011 01:04

sorry, in a pissy mood

AgentZigzag · 03/06/2011 01:06

Don't be sorry Glitternickaz, it's a bloody good piece of advice Grin

Onceamai · 03/06/2011 01:06

Don't speak to her, call the professional qualified midwives and ask them to set the boundaries they should be setting as part of their highly trained and professional job. Not sure who you call when they are screeching about their boyfriends at 3am though.

Glitterknickaz · 03/06/2011 01:07

(fourth night up late with wheezy DD, verrry tired)

AuntiePickleBottom · 03/06/2011 01:09

ask to move rooms, if they ask the reason say so you can get some shut eye

BooyHoo · 03/06/2011 01:10

i would tell her to STFU also.

she is being bloody rude and selfish.

MumblingRagDoll · 03/06/2011 01:13

Ooh tell her! I still fume that I never put the ward bossy-boots in her place and DD was born three years ago! this one thought it was ok to put all the lights off in the ward in the middle of the day because she wanted a nap! Tell her!

BecauseImWorthIt · 03/06/2011 01:14

I was amazed at the inconsiderate behaviour of the other people on the ward I was on when I had DS1.

I was admitted because my waters had broken when I was 36 1/2 weeks. The consultant decided to keep me in, but not induce me until I reached 38 weeks.

I was on a 6-bed ward, with other women who were experiencing various problems in their pregnancy. As well as us 'long termers', women who were in labour would be admitted - which was usually late at night. (Obviously not their fault, but it was often really difficult to sleep when they were moaning and groaning in the early stages of labour!)

After DS1 had arrived, things were even worse. The woman in the bed next to me, one Sunday, had her entire family arrive at lunchtime, with the Sunday papers, and they all sat there for hours. During this time, I was struggling to get to grips with feeding DS1 and felt very vulnerable trying to breastfeed with all these strangers surrounding the next bed, and - inevitably - crowding around my bed. None of the nurses ever said anything.

Sleep becomes a massively precious commodity and if others on the ward are interfering with this, then you really have to say something about it. If you can't say it to them directly then you must ask the nursing staff to do it for you.

AgentZigzag · 03/06/2011 01:21

Your post has brought it all flooding back BIWI

Must be a universal thing.

But it was the heat that got to me most, I had both DDs in winter, but the heat on the wards was just so oppressive.

Finallyspring · 03/06/2011 06:28

I had my last DD 11 years ago and this STILL bothers me. I didn't manage to get any sleep at all after I had both my children, was kept in for a few days after both and ended up feeling far far worse than I needed to just because I had NO SLEEP !

We all know how important sleep is when you are recovering, and also for your mental health. If I could be bothered this is the one thing I'd campaign about. Staff seemed to have lost sight of the normal world and would make no attempt at all to allow people to sleep.

Are there any nurses/midwives out there ?

LindyHemming · 03/06/2011 06:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Justfeckingdoit · 03/06/2011 06:53

Got a midwife to say something in the end.

She did get off the phone. She fell asleep and snores all night!

Can't win em all :)

DD born by emcs last night and is titchy and beautiful

OP posts:
YellowDinosaur · 03/06/2011 06:56

I had the girl in the next bed whose dh called her at about midnight obviously to tell her how much he loved her - very sweet apart from the fact it woke the rest of us up - F*CKING TEXT HER YOU INCONSIDERATE NOBBER!!!

I also had the 2 ladies opposite (4 bedded bay) who both had prem babies (but well enough to be in with them and not SCBU) talking at normal daytime volume - again I get that its helpful to get support from someone in the same situation but CAN'T YOU F*CKING WHISPER YOU SELFISH BITCHES??!!!

Yep, I silently fumed too and still wish I had told them to stfu.

Second time around I was in a 2 bedder and the lady in with me couldn't have been more considerate. She even took her breakfast out to the day room after I had had a very awake night with ds2 so I could sleep. Complete contrast but much much better. I am sure she wasn't best pleased to be in with me but to be fair I was as quiet as I could be - ds2 did't have the same consideration though.

Bucharest · 03/06/2011 06:56

Congratulations! And well done for telling someone!

unspoilmykid · 03/06/2011 06:57

I was in 6 days and didnt sleep for more than 10 minutes here and there. Shared ward with an indian girl opposite me who seemed to have at least 10 people with her at all times, having to do hourly obs and urine collection on myself for a few days while I was on transfusions and being near the bitching nursing station.
It was hell on earth. I havent had another baby.

Buddhastic · 03/06/2011 06:57

Congratulations hope you can get some sleep now

unspoilmykid · 03/06/2011 06:58

Oh yes, and I snore so was embarrassed to sleep as well, as well as having everyone moaning at me for it. So I was too scared to sleep.
I snore, I cant help it :(

unspoilmykid · 03/06/2011 07:00

(was an 8 bed bay but indian girl with large family opposite).

KaraStarbuckThrace · 03/06/2011 07:06

When I had DS, I was in a 4 bed ward, woman next to me had a thousand family members all day, who kept coming and going and pulling my curtain open while I was trying to feed DS Angry
And she fecking snored like a train AngryAngry
What infuriated me was the next day as DH wasn't able to come up to see me until lunchtime (he had to go fetch DSS from his mum's), I arranged a friend to visit in his place and she was TURNED AWAY Angry

Thank fuck I am having a home birth this time around!!

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