An update to I am being precious. But I still wanna go "'urgh you are disgusting"

[Pancakeflipper]

I had to update those of you who offered support and the disgusting helpful suggestions in my original post a few months ago.

I thought of you lot yesterday. Hope some of you are still about. Since my original post and the argy bargy of in-trays versus banana skins, things have been calmer.

Then yesterday it came clear why....

He's not been using my desk to chuck his rubbish onto. Nor the bin.

Yesterday a colleague sniffed a whiff near her desk. She sits opposite my colleague. She investigated and under her desk and crawled to the area under his desk area..... and it's a grave yard of apple cores and banana skins.. He eats, and chucks it under his desk. I counted 12 apple cores and 5 banana skins.

At 10.00am-ish he went to the kitchen came back with a cereal bowl. Apparently no spoons left but I had a used one in my cereal bowl from my cornflakes. He asked if he could have it.. He took it but he didn't go to the kitchen to wash it. He just stuck it in his cereal and used it. I am sooo precious. I would only do that with my close family ( certainly not snorty snotty Great-Uncle Basil) and certain close friends. Not a colleague. Unless totally desperate.

Lunch time came and it was the dreaded jacket potato and cottage cheese. It's dreaded cos' he eats it with a fork. Then to scrap every single bit of cottage cheese juice... he grabs the bowl, turns his right hand into a scoop shape, then scoops around the bowl and licks the side of his hand until satisfied he has got each little drip. It's the grunting noises that my my tummy feel wobbly.

Dunno if link will work - am a linking virgin.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1129956-I-am-being-precious-But-I-still-wanna-go-urgh-you-are-disgusting

Original opening post was:
I am being precious. I work 3 days a week. I sit next to a colleague. It is very obvious whose desk is whose.

They insist on chucking their banana skins ( I hate bananas even with my kids I am cringing cutting up a banana and handling the skins), apple cores, sweet wrappings ( don't mind that easy to pick up) and used teaspoons they used for their yoghurts. With all the lick marks on.

And I want scream " stop chucking it on my desk you gross person. "
But I think I am being precious. So I remove the debris myself shuddering.

Every Monday there are stains on my desk which I have to clean cos' my imagination will go into overdrive on what it is.

I put a in-tray between us last week. It was gone this Monday. He said "there was no room for me coffee, hope you don't mind". Our desks are massive and he has no clutter on his.

I don't want to fall out with him. But how do I get over myself? I need to loosen up.

Surely so gross/grossly inappropriate as to be a disciplinary issue. Uuuugh.

Scream really loudly and shout 'rat' and jump up on your desk refusing to come down until someone has looked under his desk where you're sure you saw it go. Then the entire office will see what he's hoarding under there and he'll maybe be shamed into dealing with it?

I don't know how you have put up with this for so long.

Get HR or management to deal with this - it shouldn't be down to you.

That's disgusting, unhygienic and disrespectful to the office and office furniture. Why should other people clear up his mess. Do you have office cleaners? Have they said anything? How can anyone behave like that? Not least in a communal area?

Ohhh, I'm so looking forward to the man's public humiliation. Please let us know his twitter account name, so we can be deafened by his silence on the subject!

I'm afraid I would have to kill the Neanderthal.

Laughing at the image of a Neanderthal typing (for Twitter) with his knuckles...

I share your disgust OP. But is there no cleaner at your workplace? If not, and nothing is ever cleaned, then filth will accumulate eventually (although not as quickly as this chap makes it - he is truly disgusting in his personal habits). But surely a cleaner should clean under desks occasionally?

Well your co-worker discovered the fruit, what did she say? Can the two of you go TOGETHER to HR and complain, maybe, so you've got some moral support?

This is just utterly blech, I can't believe you thought you were being precious!

Urgh.

You really do have to get someone in seniority to have a word with him.

Although, if it was me I'd of gone for the "stand up in the middle of the office and shout at him" option by now.

Just tell him.

"Look, this mess under the desk is disgusting, and are you aware that you eat like a pig?"

I don't understand what's stopping you speaking up.

I agree with calamitykate...............why on earth have you not said anything to him.

I think someone needs to read the Riot Act to this chap. I think it is disgusting when my teenage dses behave like this - but believe me, they get an almighty rocket when if I catch them at it.

Please tell him he is filthy and disgusting. And if you can bear it, rake out all the fruit debris and splatter it all over his desk. Then leave a bin and some cleaning cloths in an obvious place.

FellatioNelson - aha that explains the fluffy orange hair sticking out from under his cuffs....

In my pathetic defence since my original post I have been firmer, naively thinking that's why the rubbish issues were no longer. I have nicked 2 bins for where we sit. It never occurred to me he was wanging it under his desk.

Yesterday ( cos with the force of MN I am utterly fearless) I said that mess under the desk needs cleaning. He shrugged. Walked off to a meeting....

I suggested to his manager (who found the rubbish dump under his desk) that in his employer review due soon that she adds in office hygiene. She looked mortified at this as we don't do personal in our office. Told her to think about it or speak to HR. She shrugged.

We are also walking on egg shells as next week it's redundancy time. So in fairness fruit wanging is minor compared to the last couple of back stabbing weeks in that office. So I might find myself free from wild animals slurping cottage cheese. He is very smug as he has been informed he is essential to business so not likely to be one exiting.

Hmm. SO manager no help.

They are not going t omake you redundant because you complain about a collegues unacceptable office behaviour.

However maybe you could wait until you know your own employment situation and once (hopefully) your position is secure, you really need to get this sorted once and for all. Speak to HR yourself.

I'm not suggesting this because I think you will be made redundant for complaining, but rather because it may not be worth it until you know you are staying.

Oh my God, what sort of manager would shrug and ignore this? Madness!

Ask him outright why he does it?
politely and calmly say 'is your carpet at home covered in your food leftovers? if so..euugh and if not then how about using the bin at work? It's really not on to throw stuff on my desk or the floor'

then ask if your desk can be moved

I think you should report it to HR. Not only is it clearly disgusting but what happens when the mice/rats/ants arrive (and they very well could)? If there is any chance of this being a health hazard, I think whomever was affected could sue the company. If you don't inform HR, they can't do anything about it and are thus unable to protect the company from potential lawsuits. You could take that tack and look like a good "corporate citizen"

Buy some pet rats from the pet shop, big ones. Get in early one morning and introduce them to OrangUtang mans filth. Take photos and report to whoever is the most squeamish about rats.

s you might want to point out that whatever claeners/cleaning arrangements are in place at the office they are obviously not working very well!

i know this is no help whatsoever, but i would be inclined to shit on his desk.

i don't think cleaners should have to tidy up after someone that lacks basic hygiene. that doesn't really solve the problem, it just lets him think it's ok to act like this because someone else tidies up after him..

i agree snapespeare - but i would expect the cleaners to either clean it or report it, not just leave it there to rot

true, cleaners should report and take it further.

ugh! at banana skins!

The manager's response of "we don't do personal" is totally ridiculuous - "personal" doesn't include things which affect all the other people in the office!

Given the redundancy situation, I'd be inclined to try to bear it till that is clear and resolved - not because it would affect how they treat you, but because everyone is likely to be tense and either to over-react to things or else to say "That's not important given the current situation" and ignore it, and then when you mention it again they'll already feel grumpy about it. If you can survive till the end of next week, it would probably be easier dealt with after the redundancy stuff has come out and been assimilated.

Then I would take to whoever can deal with it - your own manager, HR, his manager's manager, the office manager (whoever looks after the cleaning and maintenance) and make sure they all know that it is unacceptable and needs to be dealt with.

Sooner or later, either because they care about it, or to get you off their back, someone will take responsibility for doing something about it.

Put the mess under the manager's desk, if it's so unimportant. Selfish and lazy response, IMO.

Jesus make a complaint about the man! HR? A more senior manager then the one sits oppisite. Seriously it's a health hazard!

Sharing your spoon and eating noisily you can't do much about but chucking food under his desk! Imagine what his house looks like!