DSD says she is a lesbian - I think she is lying

[whatever17]

DSD - (DD) - came to live with me when she was 12 - she is now 24.

She has never had any luck at all with men. She is really, really needy and she puts them off, possibly. However, I have heard her for years and years saying "Phwaor, Tom Cruise is fit" (or substitute). She now says she is a lesbian and has brought home a girl. Fine, if she was.

I think she is mixed up. Her mum was very indiscriminate and brought home all sorts and liked men and women and everyone.

I just think she is reacting to stuff.

If she is a lezza, fab, but I think she is just sad.

I havent heard the word 'lezza' used for years and years.

Grow up and have a

whatever17 Wed 25-May-11 04:23:48
"Why would she spend the last 12 years saying "Tom Cruise (et al) is fit"?"

I have 3 lesbian friends -2 have been married (to men) and have children, the third was engaged 3 times (to men) before they realised/decided/admitted to themselves and others that they were gay.

Just because your DSD has said she fancied/fancies Tom Cruise doesn't mean shes anything.

Let her decide and find her way in her own time.

Fancying Tom Cruise is not a sign of being straight. That's another sort of sexuality entirely.

one of my closest friends grew up obsessed with johnny depp. shes been with her girlfriend 2yrs and they are very happy. i dont think we choose guys or girls i think we choose a person.

I really hate the attitude the OP has, seen it elsewhere and it's shit.

'I'm really happy for her to be a lesbian .... but of course she can't be for a dozen excellent reasons I can quickly concoct from my position of huge authority as one heterosexual woman'

So OP, where are you, what do you say?

My mum still thinks my sister will grow out of it. My sister is 31 and lives with her (female) partner. My sister was also never very good at relationships with either sex and had posters of male pop stars etc on her wall as a teenager. My sister dated men, but just wasn't attracted to them.

Whatever

Don't say she's 'lying' - that's not very nice - a real support you are!

And why do you say lezza?

How old are you ?

Maybe it is just a phase - but so what? Let her work it through for herself. It sounds like you enjoy digging at her, and watching her fail in relationships TBH.

BOF you are such a wordsmith.

I agree, it's her life, if it's a phase it is her phase to work through. Just be supportive and non-judgmental and drop the "lezza" comments.

Beesimo put it absolutely beautifully.

Ooh. Is there beauty and wordsmithery to be found up-thread? Hell, I might just read it then. breaks- own worst habit--