Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

1 2 3

AIBU?

to be annoyed about this?

53 replies

CallMeBubblesEverybodyDoes · 24/05/2011 12:34

My friend works on a Tuesday and a Friday. She has a 9 month old baby boy and 2 older children that are at school. Yesterday she phoned me and asked me if I would look after her baby today as her childminder phoned yesterday and is ill. I agreed as the family members she would normally ask are all busy, and her husband works Monday-Friday.

She dropped her son off at 8am this morning (picking him up at 5). It turns out that her husband has a day of annual leave today and is going to have a "chill out" morning, then has a doctors appointment at 1.30pm, that is why they needed me to have their son today.

I am quite annoyed really; if he is on annual leave surely he should have looked after their DC today. They live very locally so he could easily have dropped the baby here for his doctors appointment. I don't see why I should have to look after a baby (in addition to my 1 year old) from 8-5 just so he can have a day relaxing. I mean, we'd all like a childfree day to relax wouldn't we?

Their DS is very cute but is very demanding and I've literally had to hold him from the minute they arrived or he screams, so not easy babysitting by any means.

AIBU?

OP posts:

Report

diddl · 24/05/2011 13:41

That´s it, before my 2 went to toddlers or anything I had blood tests, smears, six week check-with newborn & toddler there.

If I was his wife I wouldn´t have asked for him-lazy arse!

CallMeBubblesEverybodyDoes · 24/05/2011 13:42

Quack I totally agree; I'm the same and have taken my kids to many doctors appointment, dentists appointments etc. Like you say, it's just what you have to do.

Presumably he's in the doctors right now but I'll give him a call shortly and ask him to come and collect his DS.

OP posts:

QuackQuackSqueak · 24/05/2011 13:46

Good for you! When he arrives have a huge shopping list handy, keep looking at your watch and mumble about how you have 2 million things to get done by 3.00 then say to your DC "aah sorry you couldn't go see your little friend today, mummy had to babysit" (Passive aggressive? Only just learning what this means!)

CallMeBubblesEverybodyDoes · 24/05/2011 13:48

Haha Passive Aggressive works well in these kind of situations!

OP posts:

Scholes34 · 24/05/2011 13:49

. . . and you know what the answer should be the next time she asks.

canyou · 24/05/2011 13:55

OP YANBU to feel used but unless you know the background situation and the reason for his GP visit I personally would not ring and ask him to take his DC back, is he ill, is their a mental illness, is it possible he may be getting bad news, serious test results? .
For some reason your friend did not want the DC left with his Dad, rightly or wrongly she asked you and you agreed, the arrangement is between you and the Mum not you and the Dad,
I say this as on a few occasions I have left DC with a babysitter/friend even though DP was off, he has a highly stressed job and see's some awful things [latest was a fatal accident 6 dead] and no way could he have cope with a screaming child and fighting siblings and deal with the emotional fall out of the job, he needed space but this does not make him a bad Dad. My friends know this and accept that if I ask for a favour I will return it.

mrsbunnthebaker · 24/05/2011 14:06

dont ask him to come and get kid, dump it back on their doorstep

i would have done that the minute i heard he was "chilling" out

CallMeBubblesEverybodyDoes · 24/05/2011 14:11

Canyou, I would rather my friend had been upfront with me then I could have made an informed decision as to whether or not I did the favour

OP posts:

QuackQuackSqueak · 24/05/2011 14:11

What does he do for a living OP?

CallMeBubblesEverybodyDoes · 24/05/2011 14:21

He has an office job, Quack, not quite sure what he does though.

He just turned up, out of the blue, to collect his DS (perhaps he is a member on here....). I put his son down on the floor to open the door and his son screamed, so he started saying to me "Why is my son crying?" "Have you not fed him?" and having a bit of a moan at me about his son not being happy. I said that I'd done my best and I thought I'd done a good job of caring for his son.

So I think in view of that I will be having it out with my friend and telling her how annoyed I am that they've blatently taken the piss out of me, and also that I'm annoyed her husband wasn't even in the slightest bit grateful and didn't even thank me.

OP posts:

QuackQuackSqueak · 24/05/2011 14:23

Fucking cheek! They are treating you like a paid childminder (without the money bit).

Shock horror that his son may cry once in his life!

diddl · 24/05/2011 16:59

Cheeky bugger!

And for all those worried about him & his appointment-perhaps if it was that serious his wife would have taken the day off/he would have arranged it for a day when she wasn´t working?

I´d be ashamed to have such a useless/entitled husband

mycatoscar · 24/05/2011 17:02

hope you are going to tell your friend exactly how her dh behaved towards you and how upset and used you are feeling?

TeeBee · 24/05/2011 17:33

And of course come back and tell us what happened!!

canyou · 24/05/2011 18:21

What a ............
I take back everything I previously wrote, he should have been there with flowers, choc and wine for you I have trained my DP a mere thank you is not sufficient.

SauvignonBlanche · 24/05/2011 18:25

Cheeky beggers!

thumbwitch · 25/05/2011 00:48

Good grief, what an ungrateful sod! Definitely tell your friend that you won't be covering his "rest day" again, since he clearly feels you're unfit for the job - he can bloody well do it himself!

Rude.

MadamDeathstare · 25/05/2011 00:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

needanewname · 25/05/2011 00:55

cheeky shit!

Gooseberrybushes · 25/05/2011 00:59

Good Lord. That there are people in the world who behave like this.

whatever17 · 25/05/2011 02:12

TBH when my marriage was breaking down I had to ask a friend to look after DS2 and ex-DH wouldn't "commit" to a half day of "babysitting" said he just never knew whether he would have to do something else. Therefore said I could not leave the baby with him as he may have to leave him in the house alone.

Even when ex-DH was off work I had to hire a babysitter to come to the house - bloody embarrassing.

Could there be more going on than meets the eye?

WeirdAcronymNotKnown · 25/05/2011 06:22

Rude!

You should phone your friend ASAP and ask her to babysit. :o

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Email address

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

glassofwhiteanybody · 25/05/2011 09:51

Staggering - at first I thought you were coming on to moan about being asked to help out and was all ready to criticise you for not coming to the rescue.

However, I think it's really cheeky to ask you to look after the child just so that he could relax at home and even worse for him to suggest you hadn't looked after him.

I doubt his appointment was anything serious. If it was, she'd have gone with him

ThisIsMyLogIn · 25/05/2011 09:54

Some people never fail to amaze me. YANBU!!

spleenvent · 25/05/2011 09:56

YANBU! Very cheeky.

Flip

1 2 3

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.