To not care about my friend’s dreams?

[spatchcock]

A good friend of mine likes to describe her dreams in vivid and drawn-out detail. I do nothing to encourage this, saying a disinterested ?mmmm? and quickly changing the subject like the grumpy bint I am.

She starts with ?I had the weirdest dream last night? and launches in. The latest one was a dream about her mother rearranging her bathroom and putting the toilet outside, and then opening her wardrobe to find that she had a lot of new clothes. So no dream is too big or too small to share. She doesn?t want to analyse the dreams, just puzzle over how ?weird? they are.

I see her very regularly so I hear about her dreams at least three times a week. A couple of times I?ve tried to retaliate with long, boring stories of my own dreams but she loved it and had several more examples to share from her own dream bank.

Would I be unreasonable to turn around and start bashing my head methodically against the wall next time she starts to relate one of her dreams to illustrate just how much I hate this? Or should I be a good friend and make interested noises through gritted teeth?

Gawd. I thought it was widely accepted that talking about your dreams is yawnsville.

Just say "That's nice for you, but obviously I dont give the tiniest shit. More cake?"

YANBU - I cannot actually listen and digest anyone else's dreams. It just won't go into my brain. I sit there and wonder if I am being rude or have some kind of failing.

say ' i had a dream last night that i was being chased by a good friend and when she caught up she literally bored me to death chatting about dreams.'

although if dreams are her thang and shes a good friend,maybe just put up and zone out.

Not just me then. Thank god. I like cheesesarnie's suggestion but I'd be too scared to say that, she is lovely but a bit sensitive.

Same friend also used to compose really long poems about weekends away or events among our group of friends. Really awful. She used to wait until a few of us were sitting together and then stand over the table and start reciting. Thank god that phase passed (but it lasted for about three years).

Nobody wants to know about other peoples dreams unless

-they're in them
-they were unusual/macabre/gave lottery numbers
-they can be summed up in one sentence.

I've made sure 10 YO DD1 knows

You're going to have to firmly tell her to STFU say something I think.

The poems sound as bad as someone who 'plays' the guitar and insists you awkwardly sit and listen while they go through their nauseously popular tunes repertoire.

Always blokes.

Yep, been there Agent Zigzag. Especially bad if it's emotional ballad-style songs they have written themselves and need complete silence for.

Thank god said friend is not musical.

@'Thank god said friend is not musical'......imagine!

spatchcock, YANBU but I have to point out that your friend is not 'sensitive'. If she were sensitive she would realise how boring she was being. Do you mean 'touchy', or 'easily offended'? I bet she's really got a skin like rhinocerous hide.

Tricky one to handle if you want to keep the friendship. If you're not bothered, it's easy.

Oh kord there is nothing - and I mean NOTHING more boring than hearing about other people's dreams. I glaze over when the DDs do it

Oh God. This is second only to self psycho-analysis in my book.

Someone I know watches too much Oprah or some such thing and spends hours talking about herself and self diagnosing various disorders and tracing them all back to huge made up events in her life.

YusMilady: I mean she would look really sad and upset if I said something. I have seen the look before when I've had to cancel the odd lunchdate or something.

That's a good point about her not picking up my signals though. Maybe she thinks I always look grumpy no matter what she says.

I do want to keep the friendship, she is one of my most loyal friends and a pleasure to be with - except when she utters the words that make my whole body tense up: I had the weirdest dream last night...

Can you not look at her and then sort of drop your head as if you are about to nod off????? Then get that glazed look?? I used to have a friend who banged on and on and on and on ......and on....about her sons gymnastics......I adopted the glazed look and thank christ she moved to to bored someone else to tears!

Oh my, I am so very obviously in the minority but I really enjoy hearing about people's dreams. The weirder, the better too

I'm in the minority here. I don't mind hearing about others dreams.

Oh, Champers your post wasn't there when I posted.

At least two of us then.

In your defence though, you could tell her that you have just been diagnosed with a rare condition. When pressed, tell her that you are severley allergic to hearing others' dreams.

I also like looking up the meaning. My own are often relevant to what's going on in my life.

Thank goodness, Totem - I am not alone

cheesesarnies suggestion is hilarious

or you could start making up terrible meanings for each thing she's dreamed about... 'i heard that if you dream about outdoor toilets it means you have incestual tendencies! new clothes? you obviously enjoy licking armpits.'

I feel ya OP.

It is a relief.

Though I had no idea how much I must bore other people when I share with them.

Actually I dreamed last night that I invented a car and called it Taskuline.

Said with a Northern accent.

Which was very inspired in my dream, especially as I am not Northern.

< watches as people get that glazed over look>

you should use the terrible put down I heard recently:-

You say "where are they?"
And when they say "who?"
You say "the people who give a shit"