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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have unfriended two people on FB and to mean I don't want to see them again..

27 replies

Samjam10 · 21/05/2011 01:23

ever?

OP posts:
madhattershouse · 21/05/2011 01:25

Ummmm...depends on circumstances. More details for appraisal required Grin

DontHassleTheBOF · 21/05/2011 01:26

Yes, come on...

AgentZigzag · 21/05/2011 01:26

NU of you.

Were you close to them?

posterofagirl · 21/05/2011 01:26

not if you are drunk right now Wink

Original poster
Samjam10 · 21/05/2011 01:28

Just horrid always. Make horrid comments on my wall thing. Came to visit us the other week and took the piss out of me relentlessly. Only maybe unreasonable as we all went to school together years ago, and they seem to have reverted to school bully types.

OP posts:
madhattershouse · 21/05/2011 01:31

If they were that bad at school why would you be fb friends???

AgentZigzag · 21/05/2011 01:32

So they're making nasty remarks on your fb wall and then carrying it on when you meet them.

Are you sure they're aiming it at you?

Or could some of it be long term friend banter and they're including you in it?

Original poster
Samjam10 · 21/05/2011 01:34

Well, one of them became nice when I had my son, and then we were (by coincidence) close neighbours, and (I thought) good friends. But then we moved and in the last few years she has hooked up with other friend from school. And both are now complete cow bags.

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 21/05/2011 01:35

What kinds of things were they posting/saying?

SpringchickenGoldBrass · 21/05/2011 01:37

Just bin and move on. I have ignored a few requests from people I never liked in the first place (but who were part of a particular crowd), dumped a couple for their tendency to put tedious political rants as their updates, and got dumped by one for ticking her off about her stupid updates (she was the sort of muppet who recirculated every single Get Pedaphils Off Faceboek If You Don't Repost This You Have No Heart piece of crap).

madhattershouse · 21/05/2011 01:40

I binned a friend from school who posted loads of BNP stuff on his page. He is not missed!

Original poster
Samjam10 · 21/05/2011 01:42

Posting snide remarks - I am a bad parent, &c. I feel quite relieved to be rid, actually.

OP posts:
beesimo · 21/05/2011 09:14

My DD1 has a good phrase for this she defriended a spiteful frenemy from her FB after we'd had a chat about toxic people.

I said to her this morn are you still glad you defriended X cos quite a few of the girls mates have now defriended you and she came out with a classic line 'Yes Mam I feel much better for doing it I feel that my FB has just had a big poo and got rid of the crap!'

Longtalljosie · 21/05/2011 09:21

God, cut them off then. Who needs that? Very childish of them. Although there's something weird about the dynamic when schoolfriends who don't see much of each other get together. You're having to fight the same old battles you did when you were 16.

In fact, one of my friends (who was a popular, sporty type at school) is always arranging school meetups. I went to one - never again!

mumatron · 21/05/2011 09:27

Yanbu

I had to bin an old school friend who posted that amanda holden deserved to lose her baby as she had taken cocaine in the past.

Some people are just tossers and don't deserve the time of day

pigletmania · 21/05/2011 09:50

YANBU at all, cut them dead now!

CRS · 21/05/2011 22:54

Glad I was not BU. I do feel a bit sad to want to stop being friends with people, but actually, they clearly don't like me, so it's silly to stay "friends". The one friend I am more sad about, as we were very close for a while. But since she became inseparable friends with the other one (who I also liked individually), as a twosome, they just seem to regard me as some kind of person who exists just to be spiteful to and belittle.
And as someone said earlier - we're not 16 anymore, and there's no point in getting into this kind of playground spite. Especially as we are now very old indeed!

CRS · 21/05/2011 22:55

Ha! Just outed my own name change! I AM REALLY THICK!!

sodiumion · 21/05/2011 22:57

Dont worry CRS, I do it all the time Grin

CRS · 21/05/2011 23:02

I liked Beesimo's word: "frenemy". I think that sums this one up!

MadamDeathstare · 22/05/2011 01:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TartyMcFarty · 22/05/2011 08:35

Definitely not BU. Who needs to put up with that shit? In fact I'd go a step further and explain my reasons. Actually I'd like to think I would but I'd be too gutless! I've recently made a point of deleting people who're too Damn rude to include me in RL - don't wanna be hanging around to boost their 'friend' list.

emmanana · 22/05/2011 13:15

Go to the Privacy settings (top left, under account) and 'Block' the two people in question. This means they won't able to see anything about you on FB, including if you happen to write anything on the wall of a friend who is mutual.
This will also stop FB 'recommending' them as friends through news feeds, as it will, as it tries to match people who know each other!

CRS · 22/05/2011 21:47

Yes - it DOES now keep recommending them!

No. I am right about this, I know. Toxic friendships are silly when you think how short life is.

One of the ladies in question phoned me tonight and I didn't have my phone with me - found missed call when I got home. I was tempted to call back - but didn't - not sure I could've actually ignored a call if I knew about it, but can ignore a missed call with no message more easily.

onebigchocolatemess · 22/05/2011 21:53

no you are not BU

stick to your guns

they are being childish and reverting back to their school type

insecurities coming to the front, I can only assume they are jealous of you and your life now

how sad, best rid, well done for making a stand