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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Smacking a 10 month old? AIBU?

52 replies

pickledparsnip · 20/05/2011 22:10

Talking to another mum last week who told me that she had to discipline her 10 month old son for the first time recently. He wouldn't stop wriggling when having his nappy changed/being dressed, so she slapped him on the hand.

I was speechless!

AIBU to pretty bloody horrified?

OP posts:
Original poster
pickledparsnip · 20/05/2011 22:33

She's no friend of mine saffy85
Wish she bloody was, would have given her a bollocking

OP posts:
Original poster
pickledparsnip · 20/05/2011 22:34

I'm not sure I'm going to be able to let this one go. Not sure what to say next time I see her. Mind you we've only met twice, not likely to bump into her very often.

OP posts:
microserf · 20/05/2011 22:36

op, this post made me so sad. at 10 months old? breaks my heart.

Sad your friend has no clue about children and their development. can you find a way to have a quiet word?

microserf · 20/05/2011 22:37

sorry, just realised she isn't your friend - x post.

HumperdinkFangboner · 20/05/2011 22:37

YANBU

Horrid.

Original poster
pickledparsnip · 20/05/2011 22:37

microserf I don't know her, have only met her twice.

OP posts:
Original poster
pickledparsnip · 20/05/2011 22:38

Sorry microserf x-posted too

OP posts:
Original poster
pickledparsnip · 20/05/2011 22:40

You want to know the worst thing? She is currently pregnant with her second. Great, another baby to whack. Oh crap I feel like a right tit for keeping my mouth shut. There was another mum listening too who didn't say anything either.

OP posts:
Original poster
pickledparsnip · 20/05/2011 22:41

That was a stupid thing to say, the worst thing was she hit her 10 month old.

OP posts:
megapixels · 20/05/2011 22:41

Bit of a silly question. Did you think anyone was going to say it was fine? Your "another mum" is probably in a very small minority.

saffy85 · 20/05/2011 22:43

Totally understandable. I wouldn't want to be mates with an ignorant idiot who hits a baby either.

I don't really get parents who start this early. Discipline I mean. A friend of my sister's was once giving me tips on dealing with my then 14 month old's "selfish" behaviour Hmm (that's smug twat talk for not sharing toys btw) She was saying she took her son's favourite toys away and made him earn them back. Her son was 16 months old at the time. Think she got it off Supernanny. Effective for a 4 year old or whatever but don't see how it works on a baby. Can anyone enlighten me?

Original poster
pickledparsnip · 20/05/2011 22:44

I though people would tell me to keep my nose out!

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Original poster
pickledparsnip · 20/05/2011 22:46

saffy that's awful! I've been told that I need to start putting my 18 month old on the naughty step when he "plays up."

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davidtennantsmistress · 20/05/2011 22:47

saffy - I think it's about control & ensuring your child is older than their years. Hmm whatever happened to kids being kids i'll never know. am quite freaking out about having a child who's NOT going to be into everything/jumping/bouncing/not listening etc etc etc.

FunnysInTheGarden · 20/05/2011 22:48

Yes 10 MO is too young to smack. 18 months then maybe, but even so I have never smacked DS2 (15 months) and have only smacked DS1 twice (5) and I remember them vividly.

davidtennantsmistress · 20/05/2011 22:48

pickled - imo he won't understand. a stern 'no' on their level will suffice, i'm sure with DS I didn't bring it in until he was about 2 2.5 ish. (basically once the stern no stopped working) now he's 5 he looses his 'privileged' ie cartoons, play dates etc - am working on the loss of toys.

FunnysInTheGarden · 20/05/2011 22:49

BTW 'naughty step' is nonsense. If they have a tantrum or misbehave, they go to their room/cot with the door closed. And that only over about the age of 2.5

FunnysInTheGarden · 20/05/2011 22:51

aye and by the age of 5 it is 'you will not have your DS (nintendo) tomorrow if you carry on like that...'

teaforone · 20/05/2011 22:51

WOW asbos all round

Original poster
pickledparsnip · 20/05/2011 22:52

So, do I say anything when I next see her, if I do? I can't just go upto her and tell her I think she's out of order for whacking her 10 month old can I?

OP posts:
FunnysInTheGarden · 20/05/2011 22:53

You don't say anything because it is really not your business. You just learn and don't treat your DC like that.

fairydoll · 20/05/2011 22:54

YANBU

davidtennantsmistress · 20/05/2011 22:56

funny - exactly (well not that DS has one but yes to other things - usually it's no milkshakes in town or something)

tbh i'd prob suggest something if she brings it up again - remember we do all parent differently and you don't want to appear judgy Hmm lol. perhaps say something like. oh really I wouldn't have thought a baby would understand that, we choose to do xyz or something like that?

ledkr · 20/05/2011 22:57

ah poor baby,makes me feel awfull for him he must be realy confused, Yes tell her you were thinking bout it after she said and you dont think its right.

MosEisley · 20/05/2011 22:57

I haven't posted on here for AGES. But this has inspired a massive Shock.
YANBU