to ask if you use state or private education

[manicinsomniac]

Sorry, I know it's a little rude and personal but I only ask because I think that only 7-8% of the children in the UK are privately educated yet on mumsnet it seems to be massively higher than that which I find interesting.

So, if I'm not being too unreasonable to ask, do/did/will you use private or state education for your child/ren?

They aren't justifying, they are explaining their choices, when you think of the cars, houses, haircuts, clothes and other treats you could buy for your family with the school fees instead I doubt anybody would be anything less than delighted if they found schools of the same standard for free.

Private International School (but little choice as state schools first language is Arabic which I think would be a little unfair on the dcs)

I am not so insecure that I need or want to justify my decision to anybody, I was merely explaining that the local state schools were not good when dd started school.

My two have flourished at the school we chose for them, the local state primary was in special measures when dd was due to start and I found it unacceptable.

"They aren't justifying, they are explaining their choices,"

What, by saying that state schools are crap?

By relaying their experiences with state education and why it wasn't suitible for their child. The exam results speak fir themselves unless you are claiming private schools cheat in examinations you cannot argue with the black and White facts, some state schools can compete with private but locally the grammars are 20% below the private schools A level results and the private school takes the children who often failed the 11+

Of course private schools get better results than state schools! That's because most of the kids in private schools are the same sort of kids as the ones who get the top grades in state schools!

As I've said before, any sort of selection process, academic, financial or learning circus skills filters out parents who can't or won't show an interest in their child's education. And filters in parents who can and do, so their children do well.

"By relaying their experiences with state education and why it wasn't suitible for their child"

In my experience, most of the judgements are based on what they think state education is like, rather than on what it actually is like.

Seeker I have to disagree with you there.
"Of course private schools get better results than state schools! That's because most of the kids in private schools are the same sort of kids as the ones who get the top grades in state schools!"

In my year of 30 pupils we had 9 dyslexics. This is way above the norm and I am sure it was because they failed the 11+ their parents sent them, at great cost, to get an education tailored for their needs. Most of the girls were not high achievers or wanted to study hard, unlike most clever state school children I've met. The fact is the smaller classes, extra attention and better teachers are what make the grades better.

I am very well aware of what the education was like at the one particular state school I am referring to when dd was due to start. No idea what is like now as we have moved as she is much older. I know the Deputy Head very well, and funnily enough his own children were not at the school either.

In my experience, independent schools are not always brilliant with children with special needs. However, your example confirms my statement about concerned involved parents being the key.

There's research to say that class size is not as significant a factor as was once thought.

Not sure what you man by extra attention.

And I question "better teachers" - can you support that statement?

I'd say 50% of the children at my DC school started off at state and transferred, not so much for secondary but certainly at prep people don't want to pay unless it's really bad and they are forced too. Of course some people have tons of money and like the boater hats.

My son has left hemiplegic cerebral palsy, so definite Special Needs, his mainstream independent school is fantastic for him. I can say this as it is MY experience, I am not talking about anyone else's experience,just mine.

3 DC state school for Primary and Private Independent Boarding for Senior.

seeker I agree that some public school parents have no experience of state schools and never will.

Lots of people on this thread though, myself included, have either moved a child out of a state school for various reasons, or work in state education and want something different for their child.

DS's prep is selective, not academically, but children have to do a "taster" day. They have a number of children with specific learning difficulties, mostly ASD or dyslexia, all the teachers are qualified (lots with BEd's & MEd's). In spite of the children with Aspergers or Autism, the school has virtually no behaviour problems and none of the "low level disruption" that is the bane of my life at the school I work in, so the children who want to do well can.

This subject always brings out extremists on both sides on MN. It's awful to see some of the snobbery and reverse-snobbery spouted on here.

Why do people who choose privare always feel the need to justify their choice by saying how crap state schools are?

actually seeker, my biggest dread when taking our children out of the totally perfect primary school, to go the the private school we chose, each time has been the back wrath of parents who feel they have a right to tell me, that i am being cruel sending my children to private school, where no doubt they will be bullied! how they will end up snobby, and not have a true evaluation of the world, the list of things i have been told are endless.

I have only on here said that i am not happy with the comps we have on offer. I havn't slated them, they actually are very good. I havnt ever said anything to those parents who are sending thier children to those comps, as i respect that for some those comps are perfect, thier choice, ideal or they cant afford to do what we do. I sut wish they respected our choice.

My husband and I were both privately educated, to us it isnt about 10 A star, grades etc, it is about the all roundedness we want to give our children, the experiences, and the confidence they will gain.

I fully expect our eldest to do very well in school as both (at the moment) are very bright, yet i feel they would probably get those same grades in local comps.

State. The vast majority of people do not have several thousands of pounds per annum to spare in fees, even if they do sacrifice their car, holidays etc. (that old fucking chestnut comes up in every one of these private vs. state threads!).

To answer the OP, MN is not representative at all. There are many more affluent individuals here than you might find in a similar sized sample of the population at large.

If you have the cash and can choose private then great, but I'm getting tired of you telling me how shit the state system is. I HAVE to send my child to a state school and I don't appreciate being made to feel like shit just because I work hard for a lower salary than you. Thank you.

no i agree sovery - i have friends who teach at private school usually because the hours/pay/conditions are better

soverylucky - I'm sure his results will rise. Most independent schools simply do not have the children who cause the problems in state schools.

These are NOT the children with SEN, but sadly the ones who are being dragged up, not brought up, which state schools have to take, of course.

I don't remember kids causing trouble at my perfectly normal state school 20+ years ago. What used to happen to them / where did they go / where have they come from ?

Drives me mad!

State, I have neither the funds nor the inclination to go private when the state schools round here tear strips off them.

State until Year 5 and then private. I certainly don't expect my kids necessarily to get better results than they would have done in state sector. However they are both much happier than they were in their outstanding state primary. Quiet dd was overlooked in a class of 30 and energetic ds now thrives with all the sport on offer. So even if they don't get super results at 18 I don't think I'll regret it cos they're enjoying day to day school massively more than they did.

Woooo this has got my attention. I'm just off the phone to my best friend after talking about this exact subject. She was private schooled die to family circumstances and whilst she agrees the education was good, the boarding side of it was hell (although she's made solid friends that she speaks to every day and they're all very loyal to each other and watch each others backs so maybe it was a good thing after all?!). Anyway, I expressed a concern at the schooling in our city as really the examples of students that you see here are well a bit scary even though our uni's are top notch. So she told me that she had contacted a couple private schools (bar one which we both agree is a no as the kids always look miserable) and that they have said that as of age 7 I think it is your kid can get a bursary with them and I like that idea. She said the classes in her school are small and very one on one and I would like that for my DC's, support throughout their education BUT they will get to experience state schools up to the relevant age.

The thing I worry about is (and it's just my luck that this would happen) that after all the exam sitting and hell of getting them into the preferred private school that one or both of my DC's would get expelled. It's just my luck I tell you.

I read an article about a year ago that said that a majority of privately educated kids come from single parent families?! Why would they think that? Surely it's based more on personal preference?

Private.

"Why do people who choose privare always feel the need to justify their choice by saying how crap state schools are?"

well that's usually the reason, most people can't afford 100,000 per child just for no reason at all or because they like the uniform or whatever