Makeup put on 4 yr old DD at after school club!

[sjcmum]

AIBU to think that it is inappropriate for a 4 year old to be wearing make up? When I picked up DD from after school club today, she had lipstick, eyeshadow and nail varnish on. Should I relax and just think of it as a bit of fun? Or should I continue to be outraged? I worry what kind of message is this giving young girls.....

I wouldn't be that bothered - I work in childcare and wouldn't do it myself though as an activity. I would however just shrug it off at 4 years old. They were just dressing up and having fun. Maybe suggest face paints to the school club and doing animal make up....could get messy though!!

I wouldnt be happy at all. I wouldt be happy with face paint either tbh.
Sure litte girls dress up and maybe it was play with makeup but thats something for the parents to initiate, not a child care facility.
Nail varnish on kids is a bit tacky IMO.

My daughter is 5. I would not allow her to have eyeliner/mascara etc. But around the house she suometimes puts on some pink glittery lipgloss stuff ,and has had a tiny bit of eyeshadow on. Not all the time but just occassionally. Not sure I would be to happy with the school/after school club doing it- but for a one off suppose it would not bother me much

I can see why you're upset. i would be very uncomfortable about this too.
I'm sure it was meant to be a bit of lighthearted fun - an extension of role-play - so I'd let it go. I wouldn't like it to be a regular occurence though.

I'm even more appalled at the idea of Year 5 and 6 girls having lessons on makeup. FFS this is CHILDREN of 9 and 10 years old, being given the message that wearing make up is essential and something they have to work at.
Make up is fun, sure, I am not anti the wearing of make up altogether, but this is massively inappropriate and, once again, unless this is an all-girls school there is an extremely worrying gender-obsessed aspect to the whole business which I would be taking up with the school head, the governers and the local paper.

BROWN SANDLERS!!!!

Bum-rush my Birkenstocks, that's going to make me laugh all day

at own painted toenails and these then?

i would be a bit at the 'bigger eyes' comments too, tbh, DD plays with make-up, we paint toe nails etc, but it's not confined to the women of the household. (no, not a fetish ) we all do it, it's fun

I dunno, having a makeup lesson no more gives the msg that it's "essential" than having a violin or Judo lesson. Anyway, when girls are surrounded by adult women in real life who overwhelmingly wear makeup, of course they'd logically conclude it's an essential life skill. And given how many of them wear makeup very badly, if left to their own devices, yes, they do need to work at it.

ime, many KS2 age girls get up to massively more inappropriate behaviour at school discos than wearing a bit of make-up. Dancing to and singing along to songs with rude lyrics? Suggestive dancing aimed at boys? Catty shrieking and back biting bitchiness? Overt flirting and bit of snogging in the shadows? I've seen it all...

lljkk
"afternoon club Organiser ... said there's often very little for the older girls (y5-6) to do, they aren't into activities the other children like"
Well, her job is to provide appropriate activities they do like, which does not have to be the same as the other children but should still be safe and appropriate for all . I'd say make up lessons are not appropriate, due to hygiene risks and allergies, unless they are very carefully done and involve using completely fresh applicators for every dip in the make up and include teaching how to remove makeup without assuming that anything beyond flannels and water is also available at home (as in remove it all before the lesson ends). If it is also aimed only at the girls, it's also inappropriate stereotyping.

OP: I would be aghast at any application of anything to my child's skin, make-up, face paint, tattoos, even things like witch-hazel and suncream, without additional explicit permission (not just generalised activities permission). Note, I accept plasters BUT I would expect to have made sure any carer was aware if there was an allergy, and I would expect to provide the suncream in a named bottle for use only by my child.

I have objected to this myself- ok for dd to play with make up at home, at the weekend, when I know I have proper remover and she will not have a reaction to it (she does have reaction-prone skin), but I was very cross when she had nail varnish put on at a fair the year 6 children run at the end of term. She was in reception and I had no idea this fair was happening, they are not allowed nail varnish at school, so we had to faff around that evening with nail varnish remover. Luckily I had some, but I might not have.
I am very uncomfortable with make up at primary school age. I would rather they were running around on the field or making stuff.

I think the idea was that girls bring their own makeup, which most of them already have in abundance. So hygiene not an issue.
Getting them to use it minimally and tastefully yes an issue. Some of these girls already have spots & periods, so no wonder they want some concealer.

I'm sure the boys would be allowed to join in, too!

Why should they be trained to use make up 'minimally and tastefully' though? Why not encourage them to go gleefully wild with it and paint stars and lightning bolts all over their faces? Make up, if you use it, should be fun, not a tedious mundane ritual of erasing your personality.

I heart SGB.

Genuine q, some people have said would be ESP unhappy at nail varnish. Just out if interest, what's ESP bad about nv?

I would be v cross btw

Nail varnish- because you have to have proper remover in the house that night to take it off before they get told off for coming to school the next day with nail varnish on!! I have better things to do with my weekday evenings than remove varnish from my dd.

oh ok, just it stinks so much i wondered if it were deadly or summat.

thank you.