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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

am i being unreasonable to say no

56 replies

crunchie9 · 17/05/2011 16:44

I told my boyfriend to please not go on a stag do to ibiza 2 weeks after our baby is due...he wasn't very happy about it. I have been saving to be able to take maternity leave and had to cancel my booked holiday as the pregnancy was not planned and lost the money. am i being unreasonable??

OP posts:
DangoDays · 17/05/2011 21:01

Crunchie YANBU! Only under exceptional circumstances would this be ok and a stag do ain't one of them! When you say not very happy - what do you mean? I am hoping that it wasn't a straight up "I am going" without any recognition that this is beyond absurd! I don't think the conversation that needs to be had is purely about the stag do, but about becoming a parent and parents together. You are not being "unfair" by asking him to stay - you shouldn't have to ask. Have convictions in your instincts - you know this isn't right.

HubbaHubbaBubba · 17/05/2011 21:01

He did say 'obviously if you're still sore then I'll take someone else'. Shock Shock

jenga079 · 17/05/2011 21:23

I know Hubba. I know. When he first told me I was Angry, but then I realised he genuinely thought he was doing something nice for both of us and he (honestly!) is normally amazing so I am letting it slide for now!

abbierhodes · 17/05/2011 21:33

OP, I have to echo what Chippinin says. It seems like you're learning a lot about him here. To suggest going shows he is immature and naive. Forgivable. If he actually goes, however, then he is unforgivably selfish. I hope you have other support, because I think you might need it. Sad

Milngavie · 17/05/2011 21:37

DH went away for two weeks when ds3 was 4 weeks. He came home to ms with PND. I have never really forgiven him for going.

theinet · 31/05/2011 20:05

i think the OP should lighten up a bit. If you refuse your bloke's mate's stag in Ibiza he'll resent it for ever and think you're a control freak. Just let him have fun - you have your whole lives with your baby, his mate only has a stag once. YABU

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