Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

To think my friend shouldn't encourage her dd to kiss other children on the lips?

44 replies

Piggyleroux · 13/05/2011 21:36

My friend encourages her 14 mo dd to kiss other children on the lips. She thinks it's cute.

I saw her yesterday and her dd was really snotty. She was egging her on to kiss my ds and before I could stop her, her dd had kissed my ds full on leaving a slimy trail all over hls lips and chin.

It really grosses me out. Wibu to tell her it's horrible and she should stop encouraging her dd?

OP posts:

hiddenhome · 13/05/2011 21:38

Eeewwww

It's not cute, it's gross and annoying and a bit creepy tbh.

Liliesandveuve · 13/05/2011 21:39

Don't be so mean
snotty noses aside, kissing on the lips is fine

troisgarcons · 13/05/2011 21:39

TBH it's up to you to instil your child to turn its head away and offer a cheek .... kids kiss, it's a a natural show of affection . Kids get germs. Sneezed make disease yada yada yada. All make for a fully functioning imune system.

thisisyesterday · 13/05/2011 21:40

does she actually tell her daughter to kiss other children on the lips? or does she just tell her to give someone a kiss, and she does it on the lips?

because, if the former then yes, i think that's slightly strange

if the latter... it's normal and harmless! and i wouldn't try and stop a 14 yr old doing it becasue they wouldn't understand

that said, if a child is poorly/snotty then it's not very nice to encourage them to kiss anyone anywhere!

Original poster

Piggyleroux · 13/05/2011 21:41

Lilies - she really encourages it to the point of being ridiculous. I just don't think it's appropriate, for family, yes it's fine, but not just anyone.

OP posts:

Original poster

Piggyleroux · 13/05/2011 21:43

Thisisyesterday - she encourages lip kissing. I might be a bit pfb, but I find it gross and disturbing.

OP posts:

usualsuspect · 13/05/2011 21:44

its fine really ,its just a kiss

MadamDeathstare · 13/05/2011 21:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AgentZigzag · 13/05/2011 21:48

How sad posters find it creepy, gross and disturbing.

My initial reaction was that it's cute.

I suppose there could be situations where it's inappropriate, but to suggest it's sinister is to say she's doing it for sinister reasons.

Liliesandveuve · 13/05/2011 21:48

I think the world is divided on this. Half think kissing on the lips is fine, the other half thinks it's weird/gross. I think it depends on your own experience. IMO kissing on the lips is fine with little ones and I would be offended if you asked me to stop my child kissing yours. It's a natural way for them to show affection.

Original poster

Piggyleroux · 13/05/2011 21:48

What about boundaries though and respecting physical space? Its the way she does it (obviously shown by her mum) open mouthed. I know I sound unreasonable I just think it's not appropriate.

OP posts:

AgentZigzag · 13/05/2011 21:49

Yes, I'd not be too keen on spreading the snot runners about either, but that's about spreading germs rather than disturbing.

AgentZigzag · 13/05/2011 21:51

Boundaries and respecting physical space?

She's 14 MO!

StealthPolarBear · 13/05/2011 21:52

tiy I think a 14yo would understand just fine

Original poster

Piggyleroux · 13/05/2011 21:52

I don't find the actual act disturbing, just the way my friend encourages it. It's like she is desperate for the world to see how cute her dd is

OP posts:

thisisyesterday · 13/05/2011 21:52

pmsl! yes, i think you're probably right!

Liliesandveuve · 13/05/2011 21:53

Oh come on, respecting physical space, they can only just walk!!
If it offends you that much, tell her. You are obviously entitled to your opinion, but just saying that not everyone sees it the way you do.

LaTourEiffel · 13/05/2011 21:55

Well, my DS2 (now 18mths) kisses with an open mouth - sometimes on my nose (:-) ) but mostly on my mouth. I can re-assure you that I certainly have NOT taught him to kiss like this. However, I have taught him that kisses are natural and pleasant....as his mum I can't resist smothering him in kisses.

I think to state that a mum has 'obviously' taught something is a very odd (and judgemental) suggestion.

Small children naturally kiss on the lips, I think it must be because they are kissing with their lips, IYSWIM.

LaTourEiffel · 13/05/2011 21:59

I've been drinking - when I said 'I think to state that a mum has 'obviously' taught something is a very odd (and judgemental) suggestion.' What I'm referring to it surely can't be 'obvious' from a child behaviour what has been 'taught' as the little monkeys darlings will do their best to show you up at every opportunity!

AgentZigzag · 13/05/2011 22:01

But she is as cute as a button Piggy, your friend is just showing off her marvelousness to the world.

Sounds a bit like you're itching to take her down a peg or two for some reason.

Yeah, like lill says, tell her how you feel so she can get the measure of what you think of her cute germ spreading ways.

MumblingRagDoll · 13/05/2011 22:02

Eew yuk! Her dd or others could catch all kinds!

MillyR · 13/05/2011 22:04

Many people don't think it is acceptable to kiss on the lips unless the other person is in a sexual relationship with you; many other people think it is acceptable if you are in a sexual relationship or you are related to the person.

If you want to have physical contact with someone else, the onus is on you to make sure the other person finds that acceptable (or in this case the onus is on the parent]. It is clearly not on to go around kissing people without asking, or encouraging your child to do so, when you must be aware that many people do not like such physical contact.

AgentZigzag · 13/05/2011 22:04

Like they won't just breathing in other peoples germs mumbling...

Summerbird73 · 13/05/2011 22:08

oh is that wrong? my DS age 2 kisses people on the lips all the time, people he knows obviously! i think YABU but thats just me. and they pick up snot from all kinds of rough and tumble

Sassybeast · 13/05/2011 22:10

The behaviour of a 14 month old being described as disturbing and creepy IS disturbing and creepy. What a sad state of affairs.

Flip

1 2

Swipe left for the next trending thread