to be upset by what the paediatrician said?

[frakyouveryverymuch]

I took DS (3 weeks) to the paediatrician today because I suspect he has silent reflux. I know I'm not a doctor but I also know his levels of distress aren't normal for babies and he's got most reflux symptoms bar the projectile vomiting.

Apparently because he is gaining weight he can't have reflux. TBH I'm sceptical about that because I think he's sucking for comfort, and therefore getting milk, because he's refusing a dummy - but why would he have silicone when he can have a mummy-dummy! When I said we'd tried a dummy (against my preferences but if it helps, it helps) and that he was feeding frequently but only taking small amounts she told me that I'm causing his reflux by 'giving in' to frequent feeds, I have to wait at least 2,5 hours between feeds and 'if he cries, he cries', and I have to make him get used to a dummy.

Now I'm not one to whip out a boob when DS squeaks. I check to seee whether he's hot/cold/needs changing/etc unless it's been ages since the last feed and he can go up to 4 hours at night without waking for a feed but during the afternoon evening he can cluster feed for ages and daytime feeds are more like every 2 hours.

She might have a point but AIBU to be upset by the way she said it? Please be honest because if I am BU or oversensitive we'll keep her as our paed - she comes recommended by friends (who have quite different parenting styles admittedly) - but if I'm not I want to find a new one before DS's next scheduleed checkup.

Sorry if I wanted to chime in with a little tidbit of knowledge that I thought might be something to think on (after all, this is a discussion, not a university lecture). Didn't know I would get nailed to the wall.
I wonder, does everyone read 4 plus pages of a post entirely, everytime? Not from what I have seen. And rather than back up my claims with some hither-dither 'it worked for me' line, I thought bringing in some relevant, reliable sources in addition to my personal experiences might help my case. Obviously though, reasoning is not required. Nor is understanding, open-mindedness or healthy debate without sarcasm or bitterness.
Anything you'd like to pick apart?
Bye, bye!

Bleu have you had the episodes of blood looked into ? My DS was having episodes of bloody vomit and twice ended up in A+E with him. FWIW I rushed him down to the GP who sent him straight to A+E and she was very helpfull, I was put in a side room at the surgery as I had turned up with DS just as he had vomited and with the blanket he had bloodied (was constantly asked just how much blood so thought this was a perfect way to show this). We were kept prisoner in hospital for a week constantly monitored and measured and it wasnt until DS had a Gastroscope that it revealed yes he did have Reflux but also he had lots of tears in his Oesophagus that were causing the bleeding, also Oesophagitus and many ulcerated areas in his stomach. All this was caused by the severity of his vomiting... he had literally ripped himself apart.

Reflux can effect the breathing and DS used to 'bubble' but he wasnt that badly effected as some. The acid can burn the windpipe if they get it in there when Refluxing

After his hospital stay DS was prescribed Omeprazole (and that was a trial getting that into him as there was no paediatric version, and dont get me started on having to convince the pharmacist at Boots that yes it was prescribed for a baby, have since found a very helpfull chemist). It wasnt an overnight cure but did greatly reduce some of his distress. He is now 5 and still on Omeprazole and will tell me off if I am late in giving him his medicine

Angel it was a while before you switched from this is fact, this is more typical/my experience.

In this site people get pulled up for stating facts without the relevant references, so yes advice section of MN are treated like a university lecture.

Plus you introduced a reference made a comment kinda related to it, and then moved onto something else that had nothing to do with the reference.

Better luck next time.

Angel, you just disagreed with all the doctors on this thread! big mistake! Just leave them too it. Gosh you all sound really strange, Like you are trying to find the worst possible scenario and attacking anyone who suggests it may be something a little less medical. I'm not giving any opinions tho don't worry. Just chill out? How is OP going to get any help with so much mixed info and spats?

Yes, you're entitled to your opinion but give it and defend it as fact and it will be jumped on if it's wrong - especially when you try and get into an argument with a brilliant BFC who everyone here trusts and turns to when they need breastfeeding help!

This is MumsNet, not any other parenting forum. Here we don't let bad information pass and be nice. Your bad science could have an effect on the OPs breastfeeding relationship or someone else's, this is what we put priority on, not being nice, hun.

Angel, don't take offence.

You have misunderstood foremilk/hindmilk , or you certainly appeared to do so originally - you're not alone in this, it's often written about incorrectly, and mothers are told misleading things by their HCPs. I think since you have read other links you may have retreated from the first position, but it's no good saying 'well, that's what I meant' 'cos all the stuff about 'typically 10 mins', and 'taking time to fill up' and so on is not consistent with this.

There's no shame in getting something a bit wrong - everyone does it from time to time. I've certainly done it.

Best thing is to say sorry, I didn;t get it quite right, thanks for putting me straight!

Just to pick up some points, with the experience from both of my own children whom I breastfeed for a 4 years and 2 years, still going and pregnant.

Tandeming is quite possible. It can be awkward if you have two babies who need to be totally supported but getting the position right and it's easy. I love the look of two nurslings wrapping their limbs around each other.

Doctors and MWs as standard have half to a days worth of breastfeeeding training. Some choose to specialise but in general they're not that up to date with breastfeeding, there is no requirement to be. That includes obstetricians and paediatricians. In my area there is a HV and MW team who have specialised in breastfeeding, they would always be my port of call even though they're not part of my doctors surgery they will see anyone. If they weren't I would be looking for a BFC attached to NCT etc.

When my youngest was a baby I had plenty of milk (not a problem because of tandeming) but she had green nappies for a long time and was constantly upset. To try and solve it I only fed from one side for 2-3 hours at a time. Unlike most babies she was IUGR (which is not just a pregnancy condition, it will be with her for the rest of her life) so she was constantly hungry. I couldn't ever put her down so I could easily feed for two hours with little break. Fortunately these are breasts attached to my body and not bottles so I never ran out!

As both my girls were premature (31 and 35 weeks) I had to start life pumping. With my eldest I could not get anything going with the pump, this is hospital grade pumps that believe me are like sticking a vacuum on your nipple! When my youngest was 5 months I went to a day conference and had to leave her so I pumped in advance. I tried an electric one that didn't do anything, then Mum bought me a manual pump that was on special. I was a little skeptical, if the hospital pump was rubbish how would this cope and I'd end up aching. Within minutes I over flowed it with thick white milk. I could get 6oz a time within minutes. Again, just like these are breasts not bottles my baby is a human not a pump. She can take exactly what she needs because her mouth and my breast are designed to work as a unit, the pump is not.

Aside from the breastfeeding mis/information, there also seems to be the mistaken idea that

1. reflux and colic are the same thing - they are not!

2. and that anyone someone worrying about their baby screaming with extreme pain, is trying to medicalise the problem by suggesting that reflux could be the cause, because, crying is just something babies do.

As for Fallon8 - huh??!! (must have posted on wrong thread, surely?)

oldraver the blood in the vomit came from me, I was also expressing and was producing "pink milk".

I'm like a dog with a bone!

To the OP, here is what I was trying to get at with my original post. Maybe this will help you, as I found this concept helpful to keep in mind. And it was explained to me by my pediatrician (the best person I ever had breastfeeding advice from).

www.llli.org/faq/foremilk.html

'Although infants are not lactose intolerant by nature, a high volume of lactose can overwhelm a baby's digestive system. When there is not enough lactase to break down all the lactose, the excess lactose causes gassiness and discomfort, and frequently green, watery or foamy stools. Over time, large amounts of undigested lactose can irritate the lining of the intestines so that even a little bit passing through can cause irritation. Occasionally, this can result in small amounts of bleeding into stools that can be misdiagnosed as a food allergy. Some pediatricians will mistakenly diagnose lactose intolerance if there is undigested sugar in the baby's stool.
For most mothers, allowing baby to nurse long enough on one side so that he gets more of the creamy, higher fat milk helps balance lactose and fat to ease digestion and usually corrects the problem . For more information about foremilk/hindmilk imbalance and oversupply, see our Oversupply FAQ, and the article Finish the First Breast First from LEAVEN, our publication for Leaders.'

Apologies for any confusion. I hope this helps.