Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Facebook Helps or Hinders ?

30 replies

moominmad · 12/05/2011 13:14

Just an 'out orf interest' thread obviously Facebook is a worldwide phenomenon and is wondering are you happier its here or were you happier without.

9/10 police calls are in some way reralted to fb I got told that by a policeman was quite shocked but obviously has advantages, keeping in contact.

then the whole information scandal. and I see it alot on here aswell

thoughts on FB??

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 12/05/2011 13:15

Hinders

Nixea · 12/05/2011 13:16

Half tongue in cheek I guess but it does express a valid point. IMHO it does tent to take up a disproportionate amount of some peoples time.

Callisto · 12/05/2011 13:16

It doesn't affect me as I have never joined, and from the countless negative FB threads on here I never will join. DH uses it to keep in touch with a few friends but doesn't post obsessively.

Personally, I think it is a bit shit and pointless.

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 12/05/2011 13:18

FB is great if it is used properly. I use it for the word games (just love scramble, am such a geek) and to keep in touch with friends whom I wouldnt otherwise "see".

However, FB can be a hindrance...I know of people who spent too much time looking at statuses, getting all paranoid.....oooh, is she talking about me.........and am sure it has been the cause of many a fight/divorce/break up etc etc.

If used with common sense and maturity its great, otherwise can be a vipers nest!

redskyatnight · 12/05/2011 13:19

I find it useful to contact people I don't otherwise see/talk to much. Handy for sharing photos. But know too many people who seem to have major family arguments over misconstrued status updates. Also somewhat concerned over the number of people who seem to obsessively post what they are doing 100 times a day - is it not possible to exist without permananent attachment to your phone any more?

MilkandWine · 12/05/2011 13:19

I personally can't stand FB! My DP ex girlfriend is constantly setting up fake FB profiles pretending to be him (They have been split up nearly 5 years, suffice to say she isin't quite right). He only found out about it when his SIL mentioned that she had been sent a friend request from him. When we went on we found a fake profile with over 50 friends on it!
We got it taken down but she has put 3 more up since. Doing really childish things like linking him to gay bars etc (even though my DP isin't the sort of guy who would get uptight about that sort of thing anyway).

Also my best friend spends half her life chasing up the FB profiles of ex school chums and then getting depressed cos she thinks her life doesn't match up. Totally pointless and depressing.

So no, IMO FB is the work of Satan and I would never go on it.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 12/05/2011 13:20

Dreadful. DH is an IT teacher, he spent a lot of time refereeing FB arguments. He has introdued a blanket FB ban at school and has decreed that DD will never have an account. I wish him luck on the last one. She's already asking and she only turned 10 today.

FreudianSlipper · 12/05/2011 13:21

i do not use it

i find it strange that anyone wants to put their whole life on there. also its easy to hack into peoples accounts and i have an obsessive ex, easier to not put it all out there for him

HotchpotchHoney · 12/05/2011 13:23

I have fb, but its not something that bothers me if I can't use it for some reason. It's nice to read about friends lives that I might not otherwise know, as working full time and being alone with the dc doesnt allow for as much socialising as I would like.
However I know from experience how much trouble fb can cause. DS1 has had his fb account removed, he is old enough to have one but he was bullied via it and the police had to be involved as a boy from a different school who didn't know ds from Adam was threatening to beat him up and stab him because he spoke to his girlfriend at the park!!! We had to get the police involved when he satrted calling ds and hanging aorund outside our house. The other parents said we had over reacted by calling the police, despite already calling them and letting them know what thier son was up to! teenagers who'd be a parent of one?

seanbonbon · 12/05/2011 13:23

I'm on facebook.
It's pretty pointless.
Only positive I can think of is friends and family abroad can kind of keep in touch better but only trivial shite mostly.

I do not want or need to know what my neighbour had for breakfast.

vajazzhands · 12/05/2011 13:32

People who are attention seeking twats who keep in touch with every person they have ever stumbled across just to show that they have 500+ friends on facebook... Will always be attention seeking twats. In school they are the ones who told you every detail of who they got off with, hung out in bloody great gaggles...You see they were always twats. FB isn't responsible for this.

To the normal person, Facebook is great. I keep in touch with friends who I can't see all the time because I move countries every few years. As times change and I realise I have less in common with people I am able to delete them just as I would drop them in RL. I also find it very helpful that on FB some people have no concept of appropritaness and that the real tossers are happy to spout shit in their status they would never dare say in RL. These people are easily erased out of my life with a touch of a button.

bubblecoral · 12/05/2011 13:33

I like fb. If people just use it for mindless amusement, it doesn't cause a problem. I like being able to look at my friends holiday pictures at my convenience rather than having to sit there with prints making ooh noises like back in the olden days. I like being able to share photos with people that we go on group holidays with but that live far away. I use it to stay vaguely in touch with cousins that live abroad that I would rarely see or hear from otherwise.

I understand that children can be bullied using it, or affairs can be conducted using it, but I don't think thats fb's fault, the blame belongs to parents and individuals. Nobody blames mobile phones when it a wife finds an adulterous text on her husband's phone, so why does fb seem to get blamed for a simelar thing? Individuals need to use it responsibly, or not at all. The people are the problem, not the website.

LineRunner · 12/05/2011 13:38

It's the work of Satan and the succour of the Damned.

Too extreme?

Punkatheart · 12/05/2011 13:48

I use it to network with other writers. I choose my friends who are mostly writers, poets and artists...so it's a creative place. Most are also quite liberal and left-wing. I also get informed of writing competitions, events and book launches. I even had someone contact me and give me £200 worth of proofreading work. So it is useful and because I am a cancer patient at home quite a bit, it really really stops me feeling isolated.

Using it sensibly and choosing the people who inhabit it surely are key elements.

Of course there are sometimes issues on Facebook but surely there are issues in RL?

lljkk · 12/05/2011 13:49

I just found via FB that my dad's step-mum has died. :(
I'm not even sure if he knew!!
And yes we were both fond of her & kept in touch.
I get the impression that people make it too important in their lives not unlike MNers & MN.

Champersonice · 12/05/2011 13:53

"9/10 police calls are in some way reralted to fb I got told that by a policeman was quite shocked but obviously has advantages, keeping in contact."

W.T.F. ? ? ? ? ? Are you for real, OP?

CFAW · 12/05/2011 14:03

"9/10 police calls are in some way reralted to fb I got told that by a policeman was quite shocked but obviously has advantages, keeping in contact."

Err, no! My friend is a communications officer, the majority of calls are actually from mentally ill people, Then domestic violence/ crime numbers for insurance purposes.

LineRunner · 12/05/2011 14:16

Are the mentally ill people all using Facebook, though?

Asinine · 12/05/2011 14:18

I'm happy and I'm not on it, does that count?

TheBride · 12/05/2011 14:22

"9/10 police calls are in some way reralted to fb I got told that by a policeman was quite shocked but obviously has advantages, keeping in contact."

You can see how it works

Friend A just wrote on your wall: OMG, WTF, I just, like, got totally burgled and they stole the TV. LOL.

Friend B just wrote on your wall: Does anyone want to buy a TV off me? I don't have the receipt or box, but it's in good nick.

CFAW · 12/05/2011 14:23

Well one guy was telling her that there were people killing each other outside his flat, the call went on for over 40 mins, had armed police attending the scene.

She had to explain to her boss, she was convinced he was telling her one of the plots from the wire. Blush

Also one guy was convinced there were vampires chasing him Hmm

So i would say yes, they were all on face book

Asinine · 12/05/2011 14:26

Punk
Best wishes for a full recovery from a random stranger Smile

confuddledDOTcom · 12/05/2011 14:32

Facebook is what you make of it, like a lot of other things in life.

Punkatheart · 12/05/2011 14:35

Asinine - now that's the kind of random stranger I like!

Vampires chasing him too - bloody hell they are always at the door in our area begging for blood. I told them 'Fangs but no fangs..'

CharlotteBronteSaurus · 12/05/2011 14:35

it's like any medium. some people play nicely with it, some don't.
i use it to keep in touch with family and friends in other cities. i don't really understand people who have "friends" they've never met, or haven't seen since primary school.