to ask you to help me compile a list of impossibilities?

[ChaosTrulyReigns]

Along the lines of:

smile during a smear.

keep your eyes open when sneezing.

smudge a tattoo.

nail jelly to the ceiling.

Thanks.

Put mascara on with your mouth closed.

Not dance to Stevie Wonder 'Superstition'.

Want to sit in a separate room from DP without being asked what's wrong.

suck out a candle.

I can't believe I actually did... but I did... I tried LICKING MY ELBOW and am surprised to find that despite considerable efforts I cannot. Not a chance.

Wont be trying all of the suggestions here mind...

Charley, is suck out a candle a really rude euphemism that I'm not getting?

Satan hosting the Winter Olympics...

Put the onus for responsible sexual behaviour on boys not girls... sorry, different thread...

Maybe you can't juggle geckos because they are too 'frictionful' and stick so you can't throw them off?

Now chaos, can we ask why you want a list of impossibilities? There must be some agenda here.

Ooh, Lady I thought you were a lady

Now I have seen it written down then yes I see what you mean, but I was actually meaning a candle with a flame can only be blown out, not sucked. Not sure if this is getting worse though tbh.

Polish a turd!

Charley, I am a lady, how very dare you .

Yes, sucking, blowing out ... oh dear.

I would just like to say, I can both put mascara on with my mouth closed and lick my elbow.

However it is impossible to start essay writing sooner then the week before it is due in.

VeryStressed- we need prrof of the elbow licking

I find it impossible to herd bees, which is what I tell DH getting the DCs out of the door is like

switch on 'puter without going onto MN

or is that just me?

Be a satisfied bt customer

Put several pairs of socks in washer and have 2 clean matching socks to wear after laundry process has been fully completed.

The licking elbow thing - I have a DC who can do that. Only discovered this when we tried to make them look silly in front of relatives with the whole "no one can lick their own elbow". We were wrong.

Over the top or underneath?

It is impossible to wake up in the morning and think ' I drank absolutely the right amount last night'!

i can lick the inside of my elbow

YouMakeMe I do that lots!

Sort of fling the arm round, twist it at a disgusting angle, then plant a huge slurpy lick on it. Between that and walking round shoving a thumb bent to the wrist in peoples faces and watching the reaction...i have a disgusting DC.

But which way is the arm pointing? Towards the body or away?

Open a tube of pringles have a few put the lid on and back I the cupboard for another day , it's never going to happen.

Say you are going to just have one drink after work and not get totally hammered.

Towards the body, as if you were to give yourself a hug. Elbow then gets twisted round and up. It's not pleasant to watch but looks a lot easier to do than the usual way people go about licking their elbows.