In January my mother compromised my dd's saftey by releasing details to people she shouldn't have. I informed school, went balistic told her I wasn't happy, and if she did it again I would not have anything more to do with her.
In March the people contacted her again she was putting a lot of pressure on me, to relase information I said no very forcefully, and again reiterated she would be out of my life.
My dad who separated from my mum 20 years ago and has not spoken to her in those 20 years, was so angry at her stupidty, he asked for her number and phoned her up, and told her that what she was suggesting was idiotic. My sister phoned her and said she was being idiotic, even my mother's own husband (who i don't get on with normally) told her she was being idiotic.
We all hoped she'd get the message with noone thinking it was a good idea.
Roll forward to today, she called me to say they have been in contact again and that I am being unreasonable not to give what they request. I was at work and therefore was calmly forceful, she told me I was being unreasonable and hung up on me.
Now my question bit - all previously has been done via phone calls. I want to write a letter explaining why I am saying no, and advising her that as this is the 3rd time I don't want anything further to do with her.
My dh says I'm being unreasonable on all counts (not the sharing of information part) but that I shouldn't send letter, and that I shouldn't cut her out of our lives 'as she is your mother'.
AIBU and any advice how to get it through to the woman?