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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

in objecting to this obvious sexism

185 replies

bibiane · 01/05/2011 14:35

I have been surfing the net in search of fishing trips to Puffin Island,Anglesey when I came across www. starida.co.uk which advertised fishing trips to the island. When I clicked on the Prices link I read this little gem - ' a family trip ideal for even MUM' ? Duh! To whose Mum they are referring I can't imagine. A victorian heroine of a gothic novel who swoons whenever she sets one dainty foot on a sea vessel perhaps?

My 11 yr old daughter took umbridge to this straight away and wanted to contact the company. I think an email to the North Wales Tourist Board is in order.
Is sexism alive and kicking in Wales?

OP posts:
TakeItOnTheChins · 01/05/2011 17:34

*Blimey. Why are the people who aren't bothered about the ad so keen to stop an 11yo who is from doing something about it?

Very strange that those who claim to think it's a fuss about nothing are the ones making such a fuss on this thread.*

I'm not "keen" to stop the OP's 11yo from writing a letter. I couldn't give a hoot whether she does or doesn't. And I am not "making a fuss" any more than anyone on any thread on MN is making a fuss. I'm replying to a thread. That's sort of the idea of the site.

rainbowinthesky · 01/05/2011 17:35

Are these the same men who babysit their children? (obviously with a list and the woman then comes home to a huge mess, babies with unchanged nappies, no housework done LOL.

nijinsky · 01/05/2011 17:36

I'm uncomfortable with wording such as this because I participate in some sports which were quite sexist until recently. Road cycling can be a bit like this at times, or at least it was until recently. Therefore my tolerance for even quite mild sexism is rather low. I also do some other sports where women are in a minority but as a pleasant contrast, there is barely any sexism. Downhill mountain biking is this way. I have never met a single patronising or discouraging comment in that sport, and I bet there are far less women that do it, compared to fishing.

Christ, just remembered that it was only around 1980 or something that women were "allowed" to run the marathon! And was it not until the 1974 Olympics that women were "allowed" to participate in any longer track events than the 800m, because they were deemed to be to fragile to withstand it?

With some of the less progressive attitudes shown on here, I think we'd still be in those days!

Maternelle · 01/05/2011 17:38

I can't understand women who defend sexism. Why?
YANBU

SardineQueen · 01/05/2011 17:38

Absolutely rainbow.

You are right about the LOLs as well. One has to wonder how these men manage to hold down often quite responsible jobs? A source of endless amazement to me.

edam · 01/05/2011 17:40

Your posts don't give the impression you couldn't give a hoot, twochins. You said you hoped the company would tell an 11yo girl to 'get a life', amongst other things.

If you don't care about it, that's fine, but you seem very angry that someone else does.

SardineQueen · 01/05/2011 17:42

"I'm not "keen" to stop the OP's 11yo from writing a letter. "

No you are keen that she writes the letter and they write back telling her where she can stick her complaint (to "get a life"). Thus teaching her a valuable lesson apparently.

Actively hoping for that outcome for the child seems more than a little mean spirited to me.

chickchickchicken · 01/05/2011 18:08

yanbu and well done on your daughter for picking up on this

however, yabu for asking is sexism alive and kicking in wales. its alive everywhere. if advert was for english trip would you have even mentioned the country. not accusing you of racism, just pondering why you added country to the final sentence

lubberlich · 01/05/2011 18:13

SardineQueen - What I regard as "poop" is the claim made by someone that anyone who doesn't actively complain about his issue is complicit in grotesque sexism. Which is hysterical nonsense and unmitigated poop - because it suggests that every single person aware of this who has failed to take action is complicit in perpetuating sexist stereotypes. Which is just daft.

OP - What is wrong with consumer power anyway? If you don't like the way someone is marketing something then don't buy their product or use their service. Use one of their competitors.
It is not like you turned up for the boat trip and they said "Sorry Toots but you can't come on here with that vagina" is it?

SybilBeddows · 01/05/2011 18:14

Consumer power is great, but you also have to write and tell them why you're not using them, because otherwise they won't know.

SardineQueen · 01/05/2011 18:20

Actually lubber I think you'll find that exact vagina exclusion on page 2 of the paperwork you have to sign to go on the trip Wink

lubberlich · 01/05/2011 18:23

Of course and this dovetails back to my earlier point (made what feels like several months ago) that the kid needs to know what specifically she complaining about and what she wants as an outcome.

lubberlich · 01/05/2011 18:27

I do know a very rude joke about Wales and vaginas.

aliceliddell · 01/05/2011 18:28

Anyone else notice the tedious regularity of the "Of course, sexism is terrible and we oppose it with our dying breath. But this (insert topic as required) is obviously not real sexism. It, and you bloody feminists, can therefore be dismissed as either hysterical or humourless"?
Has anyone got any bingo cards left? I used all mine on the 'Calm down, dear' thread. And, by the way, you feminists are obsessed and get it all out of proportion, so you don't ever get to decide what is real sexism.

GORGEOUSX · 01/05/2011 18:34

What Robins said.

smileyfacestar · 01/05/2011 18:40

I think some people are getting far too sensitive to this sort of thing and no sexism is not alive and kicking in Wales. Get over it.

edam · 01/05/2011 18:44

Yup, Alice, sadly it is far too common.

It's one thing for someone not to be particularly worked up about issue X but I really don't get the self-righteous outrage that other people are bothered by X. I don't particularly care about lots of stuff that's discussed on Style and Beauty but I don't go over there to and post 'why are you discussing this, you should all be talking about something else'.

SardineQueen · 01/05/2011 18:53

Shock sexism is not alive and kicking in wales?

Really? It's completely different to the whole rest of the world?

wotnochocs · 01/05/2011 18:59

..and why would a 3 yo be reading MN in a few years ???

StewieGriffinsMom · 01/05/2011 19:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SardineQueen · 01/05/2011 19:07

I'm up for it stewie Grin

It would be great to be able to raise my girls in a country with equal representation in parliament, no gender pay gap, no rape or sexual assault, where men are held to account in terms of paying for their children, where topless "lovelies" aren't displayed in mainstream newspapers and magazine covers don't deride women for having one mm of discoloured flesh on their inner ankle.... Oh wait...

lubberlich · 01/05/2011 19:08

So are we to assume that some people will be firing off emails to these sexist monsters to ensure they cannot be accused of being complicit in this casual sexism?

If people truly believe that the biggest battle that women have to fight in 2011 is one word in a brochure for a piddling little company in the back end of Wales then I despair.
The ConDem slash and burn is hitting women harder than any other section of society. Young women are particularly in jeopardy.
If people are going to get pissed off about something then get pissed off at these appalling cuts.

activate · 01/05/2011 19:11

oh FGS - the number of women who enjoy fishing or would go on a fishing trip is vastly disproportionate to the number of men

so yes there will be female fishers, who will no doubt be every bit as good and every chance of being better than the fisherman standing next to her

but as a generalism it is not right up a large proportion of women's street

vive la difference

SardineQueen · 01/05/2011 19:12

Who has said this is the biggest battle to fight?

I for one can't find it in me to get worked up about this particular thing... BUT the important thing is that the OPs daughter IS worked up and she wants to complain. So let her, say I. It matters to her, let her tell them what she thinks. Why would anyone want to stop her?

And why would anyone think that objecting to an ad about fishing means that you can't also object to things like government cuts... ? Many of the people on this thread are, I'm sure, capable of holding more than one thought in their head at the same time Shock

SybilBeddows · 01/05/2011 19:14

and we're not allowed to get pissed off about anything else whatsoever until the cuts stop, is that your point?

what business is it of course how anyone else prioritises their activism?

if you are campaigning against the cuts being targeted at women and you have an action you would like us to take part in then please do come to the feminism section and tell us about it, I am sure you will find a lot of support for it there.

Quite a few of us are members of the Fawcett Society, perhaps you are too, and I'm sure you know about their campaigns in this area.