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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that as i endure pain that i HAVE to take painkillers for every fecking month, that i should sometime soon get a...

35 replies

bigbumum · 28/04/2011 16:21

Freaking BF+?

We time "stuff" around it and each and every month...BFF-.

Bastards.

Today i am kinda walking funny because of the pain in my abdomen, taken paracetamol and still got discomfort through that.

So what the heck do you think is occurring for me to have pain on day 14/15 and sometimes 16 every month if not ovulation, and why have we been trying for 17 months now with nothing to show for our efforts except for loads of sheets to wash???

Hmmmm, impatiently taps foot and glares accusingly at no one in particular.....

OP posts:
ImNotThere · 28/04/2011 16:29

Poor you. I hope it happens for you soon. We had no discernable fertility problems and it still us took nearly two years to conceive our first, so hang in there.

ImNotThere · 28/04/2011 16:30

I mean 'took us' of course...

Insomnia11 · 28/04/2011 16:35

Isn't it better to chill out, have fun and just have sex two to three times a week all the time rather than worrying about when you are fertile every month and then sex becoming mechanical?

Fair enough I can understand working out your dates if your partner is away or something. But otherwise it seems a recipe for stress. Also you shouldn't be having a lot of pain with ovulation, perhaps get that checked out?

Original poster
bigbumum · 28/04/2011 16:50

Tried that insomnia, after the 100000 person told me to "relax and it will happen" (i have so far held myslef back despite wanting to bloody a nose or two after such helpful suggestions)

Still nowt happened so we took control and just do the deed every other day after my period ends.

Thats all we do (im not into charting and that mucous thing folk seem keen to do...bowk, or temperatures or any of that shite, im far too lazy to be arsed)

Trouble is...im 40, ive had 5 mcs and im kinda keen to get a crack on iyswim...times ticking.

Had scans while mcs take place and everything apparently looks ok in there, overies etc all normal. Again, im far too lazy to be arsedwith being proded and poked because the medical profession could not be less interested in me and my bits.

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Insomnia11 · 28/04/2011 16:54

Sorry to hear about all the MCs. All the best x

Original poster
bigbumum · 28/04/2011 16:56

ta chuck x

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thisisyesterday · 28/04/2011 16:59

hmmm, this sounds really obvious and you've probably tried it anyway, but do you have to time it around when you feel crappy? have you done the every other day thing?
i mean, i don't know what else it could be, but if it isn't ovulation...

thisisyesterday · 28/04/2011 17:00

oh sorry, just read that's exactly what you do Blush

don't know then i'm afraid, but there are some very knowledgable people on here who i am sure may be able to advise.
have you read taking care of your fertility? it's supposed to be good

lubeybooby · 28/04/2011 17:02

I have endometriosis and my pain is mid cycle - maybe get checked out?

Original poster
bigbumum · 28/04/2011 17:02

hehehehe Grin thisy, not read any books as they kind tell you what you already know tbh. I dont think i can be doing any more or anything different.

sigh, thanks for the tips tho Smile

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Original poster
bigbumum · 28/04/2011 17:04

mmm endometreosis you say..... could be, but as i say, they had a good rumage around with the numerous scans that i have had over the years and they say everything looks normal.

What do they do to diagnose endometreosis?

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squeakytoy · 28/04/2011 17:06

Thats all we do (im not into charting and that mucous thing folk seem keen to do...bowk, or temperatures or any of that shite, im far too lazy to be arsed)

It might help though, honestly. There can sometimes just be a very short window of time when you can get pregnant in the month. Temperature charting is really easy, just keep a thermometer by the bed, and jot the temp down, or use the iPhone app ifyou have one.

BlueFergie · 28/04/2011 17:13

That book is good but I think it is called 'taking charge of your fertility' rather than taking care...

Original poster
bigbumum · 28/04/2011 17:18

I am not convinced though.

If i have pains every month indicating that ovulation is taking place, i have had blood tests galore to tell me that i do ovulate each month and we have sex every other day month in month out and i still do not get a +, i am begining to think that acually there is something much more going on in my nethers.

think i will get that book actually fegie because a few people have mentioned it now so it would be worth a wee look.

Thanks for listening to me be negative (!!) and moan and complain, its very annoying and not to mention difficult to deal with when i feel i have so little time left.

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Original poster
bigbumum · 28/04/2011 17:19

ooooh of course meant NEGATIVE as in -__----negative defo not +...i wish!

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squeakytoy · 28/04/2011 17:22

I do know a lady who was trying for many years, and at the age of 42 had given up and was resigning herself to it never happening.

Her little boy is 3yrs old next week. Natural conception.

So dont give up hope!

Try using the ovulation sticks. They will tell you just before you ovulate. Which is the optimum time for conceiving.

MotherMountainGoat · 28/04/2011 17:28

Endometriosis cannot (generally) be diagnosed from scans - you would need a laparoscopy to know one way or the other. TBH, the combination of difficulty TTC and pain mid-cycle would raise a big endo flag for me. Endo doesn't mean you can't conceive, by the way (I've had endo for many years and have 2 DC), just that you might need a bit of help along the way - a minor (laparascopic) op to remove adhesions or some hormonal medication.

I remember going to a lecture many years ago where a Chinese doctor was claiming that acupuncture was incredibly successful for infertility due to endo. Now, I'm a big fan of acupuncture for solving various problems, but I'm a bit bewildered as to how it can help you get pregnant.

Why don't you check out the Endometriosis Association website? There's a really good forum.

Best of luck with it all.

BlueFergie · 28/04/2011 17:35

Probably obvious but wondering if DP/ DH has been tested? You have all the blood tests scans etc but has he been checked

kviddy · 28/04/2011 18:30

you might actually be having sex too often. Try holding off for a few days to let partners sperm to peak and then have sex on the day of ovulation and the day after and then leave it till you just feel like just because!.

these ovulation test strips I found work great and are cheap to boot:
www.amazon.co.uk/Highly-Sensitive-Ovulation-Fertility-Strips/dp/B001G7P62S/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1304011754&sr=8-1

Dont wee from 11 am and then use it at 2 pm and you'll catch your window.

HTH

acebaby · 28/04/2011 18:45

Sad. Poor you. Have you tried the fertility friend website? It is a really good community and great technology. I hope it happens for you soon.

Do ask about endometrrosis. Small amounts may require a laproscopy to see, and according to a consultant at the bridge clinic in London even small amounts of endo can reduce fertility.

acebaby · 28/04/2011 18:46

Yanbu by the way!

Original poster
bigbumum · 28/04/2011 19:28

ovulation sticks...pile of shite! i had some given to me, enough for a couple of months, every day they were negative which freaked me out to thinking that i dont ovulate at all...ever.

Blood tests say i do, so big relief.

DH is fine, checked out ok. Also with 6 pregnancies, i can just assume that his swimmers are ok. All chromosomal bloods also came back fine (Kariotyping etc)

Fertility friend sounds handy, will check it out...am i allowed to swear on there?? as i do.......allot out of frustration Grin

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acebaby · 28/04/2011 20:21

It's American, but it is surprising how quickly you get into the way of saying heck and gosh! It was a lifeline to me. I loved getting everyones opinions on my chart and browsing through other people's (geek that I am).

HerbWoman · 28/04/2011 20:27

Coeliac can be related to recurrent miscarriage - have you been tested for this?

Original poster
bigbumum · 28/04/2011 20:52

coeliacs! think at aged 40 i would know by now if i had some sort of digestive disorder tbh.

thanks anyway herby xx

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