AIBU?
Men are curious, right?
Mumof2smallchildren · 28/04/2011 01:52
Is there a good reason why a man would have googled swingers clubs and lapdancing bars in local towns, when he was meant to be at another, important, thing? A thing where I can't check if he actually went?
(namechanger as I think he searches for my real name)
Oh God. If he is lying about this then I literally don't know what to do.
Mumof2smallchildren · 28/04/2011 01:53
Is there any way I could check if it was just a google? (have found this in his internet history, in the middle of the afternoon, in fact when I'm pretty sure I was sat in the room and he told me he was looking up where the meetings were that night)
Oh shit shit shit. Doesn't look good, does it? Please reassure me, someone.
Mumof2smallchildren · 28/04/2011 01:56
He has done it before - I know, because I went with him. Years ago.
We agreed that, although it was fun, we wouldn't do it again.
Especially not alone. Even when we did it that once, we agreed we would never do it alone.
Plus, the thing he was meant to be at (I am being really careful to not use words that might trigger a search if he was to search) is a condition of us staying together...a meeting that is anonymous, and, er, helps people to stop having beer.
Mumof2smallchildren · 28/04/2011 02:01
I thought it odd when he was so keen to go to the meetings. God, he went to one tonight. He was really subdued when he came back.
We've not been having sex lately, just doing...other stuff. He said he liked how it was making us more intimate.
Oh God.
Geocentric · 28/04/2011 02:04
Look, if you are both routinely searching each others internet history it sounds like you need to stop searching and start talking to each other instead. Wouldn't it be far better to get things out in the open? If you can't trust each other, its not a very good basis for a relationship... Just ask him right out, and maybe also talk about why you are both checking up on each other online. (be brave!!!! 
)
That sucks. 
Mumof2smallchildren · 28/04/2011 02:18
OK, there is another thread with me under my real name (don't want to say it in case it comes up in searches) It is in AIBU, title is about taking kids to nursery. Explains all.
OMG...he's asleep. Kids are asleep.
Do I wake him up? I feel like I need concrete proff.
I don't so much mind porn, if that was all he was looking up...but there is plenty of porn online, why would he just want to look at official websites for lapdancing?
Geocentric · 28/04/2011 02:38
No problem.
Just been skimming through your thread - some really good advice there!
I can see it would be hard to go on as usual tomorrow, I just don't think it will be very productive to talk right now. Can you snuggle up with your kids for tonight? Is there maybe someone who can babysit tomorrow for a while so you can talk?
And... keep talking on the other thread - lots of great people on there who are much better than me at this kind of thing.
Mumof2smallchildren · 28/04/2011 02:39
...I dunno...what should I do?
I don't think he can stay here - he'll have to go to his mums. I don't have family nearby so that's the only option really.
How do these things work? We've just moved into a new rented house. It's nearly £200 pcm more than me and the kids would get in housing benefit, and I can't work very much due to severe health problems.
Oh god, will I lose the kids?
What do I do? What if his parents take his side?
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