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AIBU?

To think that "slut" is not a term which should be used about any woman...

51 replies

Vallhala · 27/04/2011 23:44

... especially not by a candidate for election?

BBC news

I despise terms such as "slut" and find them deeply misogynistic. Sadly I've seen them used here on MN too on occasion and wonder what the hell women think they're doing to society's view of the female population when they use such expressions.

To call a woman or group of women a slut/sluts is unforgivable even when said by the average person in the street IMO. Surely it's even more so when said by someone who aims to be elected into power.

AIBU to hope that this man never gets the chance to stand for a position of influence in the community again?

OP posts:
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ChaosTrulyReigns · 27/04/2011 23:47

Absolutely agree.

Unnecessary and glad that there's been visible consequences.

It may make someone thing twice before uttering that awful word.

Angry

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chicletteeth · 27/04/2011 23:47

No he shouldn't at all.
Ever.

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DaphneHeartsFred · 27/04/2011 23:49

Surley 'slut' for a woman isn't any worse than 'cock-lodger' for a man?

Do we need to ban all insults in case they offend someone? Isn't the offence the whole point of the insult?

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SpringchickenGoldBrass · 27/04/2011 23:49

What a complete wanker that man sounds.

Though some people like to reclaim the word slut (there is an Ethical Slut movement and I have a badge which says Fairly Ethical Slut on it) - Ethical sluthood is not just about reclaiming the word but insisting that having multiple and many sexual partners is a good thing not a bad one.

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StayFr0sty · 27/04/2011 23:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RobF · 27/04/2011 23:50

Is he a Muslim? There's a worrying trend for young Muslim men to see white women as sluts because their own women are kept covered up and asexualised.

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StayFr0sty · 27/04/2011 23:51

This reply has been deleted

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worraliberty · 28/04/2011 00:00

I have to say in all my 42 young (lol) years, I've mainly only ever heard the word slut used by women to other women.

Very rarely have I heard it from a man.

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RobF · 28/04/2011 00:01

The point about Muslims is that they see non-Muslim women as sluts, and their own women as something else.

It is a problem in all societies I agree. Women are equally as guilty as men though. They are at least as judgemental of other women as men are.

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Vallhala · 28/04/2011 00:02

Agree with SF. Slut is as commonly used amongst women of all kinds and white middle class ex-public school men as it is Muslim men.

It's horrible. I'm no prude, I swear like a trooper and can insult with the best of them but slut/slag etc is beyond the pale even for me.

I don't think that it is the same as cock lodger. I had never heard of that until I came across MN but have taken cock lodger to be a man who lives/sleeps with a woman and who contributes little or nothing to the relationship orr household, financially and/or emotionally, not one who sleeps around.

And yes, I can see the logic in reclaiming the word and that a woman who sleeps with multiple or more than the average number of partners is not a bad person but the term in this case was used for no other reason than to villify a large number of women in general.

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StayFr0sty · 28/04/2011 00:08

This reply has been deleted

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gomummygo · 28/04/2011 00:12

Agree completely.

I also swear like a trooper when DS is not around, but would not utter that term, and actually find it amongst the most offensive words I've heard come out of others mouths. I tend to tell them this in no uncertain terms.

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cat64 · 28/04/2011 00:16

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cantspel · 28/04/2011 00:18

slut is no worse than cunt and that is used on mn all the time by women about women

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worraliberty · 28/04/2011 00:29

In strict Muslim countries Muslim women are very much seen as sluts if they have affairs or are unfortunate enough to be raped. Some are stoned to death Confused

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duckypoo · 28/04/2011 00:32

I think slut is worse than cunt in a way, I would use cunt, cuntish behaviour ect as a general non gender specific insult (if I were so inclined). Slut/slag is gender specific.

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RobF · 28/04/2011 00:34

Is "slag" worse than "slut"? I always thought it was. "Slut" has been reclaimed a little bit. "Slag" is just nasty.

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StayFr0sty · 28/04/2011 00:38

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cantspel · 28/04/2011 00:38

I would never used the word cunt as i think it is an awful word but i will hold my hand up to using the word slutty, usually about dress or behaviour

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cantspel · 28/04/2011 00:44

Depends what generation you are as young women and men do use the word slut to describe a man. the also use the term man whore which i think is gross.

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Vallhala · 28/04/2011 01:10

Now cantspel, I see it in completely the other way. Until I came across MN I reserved cunt for my violent, controlling, daughter-deserting ex husband. Very non-gender specific. Now I admit to using it on occasion to describe other despicable behaviours such as child abuse, animal abuse and the like, but still not about a sex or sexual behaviour, much less with reference to female sexual behaviour.

I'd never dream of using "slut" to describe a woman or her behaviour, far less her dress. God knows, although I'm an old 40 something now I used to do the heels and mini skirt thing when I was a perfect size 8 natural blonde. I had it and I flaunted it! I wasn't a slut though I've had more than my fair share of men too and now I'm going white in my old age I don't consider (generally younger) women who dress in a certain way - i.e. as I used to - to be sluts or sluttish either.

I'm a firm believer that dressing provactively/sexily/prettily (is that a real word??!) is a woman's right and doesn't metit insults or judgment any more than a man wearing a suit and that stupid item of attire the tie gives anyone the right to categorise or insult him.

For me, "cunt" is assexual. It's the man who abuses his wife, the woman who kicks the dog but "slut" is only used to denigrate a woman who dresses in a certain way or whose sexual behaviour is outside the norm but who in doing so has her behaviour, morals and whole self held up for inspection and judgment in society... and yet men can dress and act as they please much less sleep around and there is no real equivilant word.

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LDNmummy · 28/04/2011 01:23

I cant stand 'slut' or 'slag' and think women who use these terms are ignorant or self loathing.

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KatieMiddleton · 28/04/2011 01:32

Yanbu. It is a horrible derogatory term. There is no equivilent term for a man because it is more acceptable for men to be sexually active outside the constraints of a monogamous relationship than a woman.

Women should be able to enjoy sex without having a nasty label attached to them.

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KatieMiddleton · 28/04/2011 01:34

...or indeed just look like a woman who enjoys sex.

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cantspel · 28/04/2011 08:20

Heels and mini skirt isn't dressing slutty but heels and mini skirt and no knickers is.
Having a lot of sex and enjoying sex is not slutty but having drunken sex in a shop doorway with some bloke you don't even know the name of after a night on the lash is.

You might not like the fact that is is judgemental but everyone judges everyone else by what they wear and now they behave and this place is no exception.

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