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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think she should have minded her own business?

31 replies

jojane · 27/04/2011 10:31

Yesterday we were shopping, my 2 year old DD was having a tantrum outside a shop we had just been in as we wouldn't buy her a dora dress she saw. I started walking off with the pram and DH had my 4 year old and was telling DD to stop being silly, anyway up walks a nun, says something to her and gives her a little chocolate egg!!! WTF how is that teaching her acceptable behaviour? Now she is going to think if I scream and shout strangers are going to give me sweets!! Also she didn't give one to my son who WAS being good and standing right next to DD.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not against people giving kids sweets, don't think they are all peados wierd just that screaming children shouldn't be rewarded.

OP posts:
zikes · 27/04/2011 10:33

As a one-off I don't think it's the end of the world. And a nun is hardly your everyday stranger.

agedknees · 27/04/2011 10:33

She probably thought she was helping you out, maybe? Don't forget, shes a nun, so the probability is that she has never had dc of her own and didn't realise that she was rewarding bad behaviour?

Sitting on the fence on this one.

BluddyMoFo · 27/04/2011 10:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NotShortImFunSized · 27/04/2011 10:36

Personally I'd be a tad pissed off. I don't like people giving the kids sweets without asking first. (I'd more than likely say yes if they asked but anyway..)

I think she was probably trying to help but tbh she shouldn't have got involved Confused

TragicallyHip · 27/04/2011 10:37

YABU It was a nun, she was just trying to be nice

The nun was BU for not giving your son one too

upahill · 27/04/2011 10:37

Another case of can't do right for doing wrong.

i'm guessing the nun was doing her best in a kind way to make things easier for you.

Ok maybe misguided but well meant.

let it go. not worth a rant about tbh

BeerTricksPotter · 27/04/2011 10:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DramaInPyjamas · 27/04/2011 10:40

Wouldn't be too fussed if this happened to me tbh..
Might be a bit annoyed the my son didn't get one as well though

travellingwilbury · 27/04/2011 10:43

A nun giving out chocolate eggs is just so weird a sight to imagine to me .

Did your dd stop whinging ?

She should have given one to your son as well I suppose but maybe it was her last one ?

BeerTricksPotter · 27/04/2011 10:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

travellingwilbury · 27/04/2011 10:57

I just couldn't get cross about a nun doing this .

I mean she is a nun I am sure their was no intent to piss you off .

QuelleLeJeff · 27/04/2011 10:59

haha. This hahahaha can't be true surely? hahah!

You can't be annoyed at a nun!

olderandwider · 27/04/2011 11:01

I think it was a kind gesture, if pyschologically flawed, and it would be surprising if your DD begins throwing tantrums in front of every nun she encounters in the hope of receiving chocolate Grin

travellingwilbury · 27/04/2011 11:04

Good point older , she will only associate the chocolate and tantrum thing with nuns so unless you live in a nunnery you should be ok .

foxinthewoods · 27/04/2011 11:04

It was Easter, so Nun probably carried the eggs to give out to people, it may not have had anything to do with the tantrum. I wouldn't get too concerned, the main thing your dd will remember is that you didn't give in to her.

DramaInPyjamas · 27/04/2011 11:06

I've never seen a nun in RL.

[useless information]

travellingwilbury · 27/04/2011 11:10

I once went to look after a nun who was very sadly dying , she told me it was ok to park my car outside on the road as it was Sunday .

God obviously thought I wasn't doing a good enough job . I came out to a bloody parking ticket .

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 27/04/2011 11:14

oh I used to sigh with relief when old dears waved a grubby paper bag filled with mint imperials or whatever under dds nose when she was in full meltdown mode [cblush]

upahill · 27/04/2011 11:41

'travelinwilbrey' Are you saying nuns are liars? Shock Grin

WhiteBumOfTheMountain · 27/04/2011 12:01

A lovely Nun once held my hand in a museum when I was crying and very sad. YABU. Nuns are ace. Grin

TheRepublican · 27/04/2011 12:03

What a nasty fucker that nun was

dickiedavisthunderthighs · 27/04/2011 12:10

It's threads like this that remind me how much I love AIBU

animula · 27/04/2011 12:12

Let it go. She was trying to be nice. Would it help you to recognise that it was and act of a stranger, being kind to you, and your child, though admittedly this act took a form that you wouldn't have chosen?

It's a nice thing in the world when strangers take the time to be kind to people they don't know/us.

I can see that you wouldn't have chosen that particular action, but you seem so cross, that it seems to me you have chosen to interpret this as, almost, a randome act of unkindness, even assault.

The world is going to seem far more hostile than it really is if you choose to interpret actions of others this way. My suggestion would be to look at it as a well-intentioned act, one of generosity. Goodness knows, there are going to be enough times when people do act in genuinely hostile/alarming ways to you and yours.

Well - this is a well-hippy post, so, I might as well get hung for the whole sheep -- My advice would be to pass it on. Do something randomly nice for some stranger today. I've never read that book that suggests this (though I almost gatecrashed a party for the author once, some years ago). Even to my ears, it sounded a bit sickly. But, hey, the sun is shining, and it's probably ergonomically better for society as a whole to do nice things, rather than nasty things to unknown others.

LoopyLoopsNincompoop · 27/04/2011 12:14

I'm having nun of this nunsense.

orangehead · 27/04/2011 12:16

lol TheRepublican