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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not give eighteen year olds anything for easter?

36 replies

Tortington · 25/04/2011 21:19

the title is phrased rather provocatively as that is not really how this post goes...

my PIL came down for eater and stayed with my bil

i have three kids - two at home - twins aged eighteen.

they have two kids 17 and 9. we went round yesterday and gave eggs. mil, fil and the cousins all got one.

they told me that they don't buy eggs now that the twins are classed as adults.

i thought that was petty - for the sake of a couple of quid.

and i can't see myself not buying the 17 yr old an egg next year as i give her brother an egg - just becuase she is eighteen.

what say you mumsnet?

OP posts:
FabbyChic · 25/04/2011 21:20

I say also things stop when a child becomes an adult.

LadyCornyOfSilk · 25/04/2011 21:20

tightwads

fluffles · 25/04/2011 21:21

my mum used to send me an advent calander when i was 25 - i thought it was so sweet Grin

Zooo · 25/04/2011 21:22

At 18 I don't think I actually wanted an egg. I'd have preferred the cash!

MrBloomEatsVeggies · 25/04/2011 21:22

My present/egg/anything buying stops when the person in question reaches 18. And the 18 year old in question is told this when they turn 16 & 17, so it isn't a shock.

rookiemater · 25/04/2011 21:23

They may not have remembered. We were on holiday with SIL and family and obviously I got eggs for their two younger kids but felt really bad that we hadn't got anything for their 17 year old boy, when I was buying them I just didn't think of him as a kid and there were no shops near where we were.

usedtobeahappycamper · 25/04/2011 21:23

I stop at 18 for other people's but I must admit I gave my own DCs Easter eggs until they were over 30! (Stopped now though).

Original poster
Tortington · 25/04/2011 21:28

righto - thats me told then. i'm not getting the 17yr old shitall for xmas - as she will then be eighteen. AND i;ll tell the year old santa GOT KILLED byt hte toothfairy

OP posts:
Newgolddream · 25/04/2011 21:28

I have 3 boys aged 3, 9 and 18 - theres no way I would have left DS1 out of buying an easter egg for, he was delighted with his! Maybe if the 18 year old in question was an only child but when there is younger siblings getting eggs for example bought from someone else I would think it a bit odd if DS1 was missed out. As it is we dont have a big family and me and DH are the only ones that buy our boys eggs.

LauraIngallsWilder · 25/04/2011 21:31

I would buy eggs for any family who visited me at Easter tbh!

I bought a £1.25 egg for each of my kids and a 49p egg for me and exH

So given that tiny cost yes I would buy eggs for 18yos :)

LauraIngallsWilder · 25/04/2011 21:33

My mum still buys me an egg if she is visiting at easter (she lives 400 miles away) and Im definitely over 30 :0

Nagoo · 25/04/2011 21:35

it's not the parents that stop, it's everyone else. How long do you expect people to buy your children eggs for? They are not children any more!

In our family, we all had kids at about the same time, and there is not enough money to get all the children presents for christmas and the adults. So grown-ups get nothing and the kids get the gifts.

Christmas is a bit barren for me, but I'm a grown up.

WannaBeMarryPoppins · 25/04/2011 21:35

Aw, that is quite sad. I am 23 and at uni at the moment and my mum send me some stuff from abroad (not eggs but some of the candy I love) and even my DPs grandparents send down an additional egg for me.

It's a few pounds but it is nice because it's chocolate and you can stuff yourself you know people think about you

Mayqueene · 25/04/2011 21:36

I agree with you Op, petty beyond belief!!

My best friend gave my DS1 (18) a small egg, (as well as the younger ones) her view was why wouldn't I, I've been doing it since he was born!

My mum had a godmother, who sent me first 50p, then a £1 (when everything got dearer bless her Grin)every single birthday and Christmas till she died when I was mid 30s, and did the same for my DC too.

I always appreciated the thought and plan to do the same.

Original poster
Tortington · 25/04/2011 21:42

the family literally consists of their children and mine. money isn't the issue. of course iw ould understand if there were 17 cousins to buy for. not even a cream egg - tight fuckers

OP posts:
Nagoo · 25/04/2011 21:43

I think you don't want your children to be grown ups.

I mean, that's fine, I don't want my children to be grown ups either, but you can't expect other people to observe them as 'children' when they are not.

ILoveDolly · 25/04/2011 21:44

at my family easter gathering we buy eggs, choc or little presents for everyone young and old - although the kids do get the most. I love it! Yum..

ScatterChasse · 25/04/2011 21:49

If you weren't seeing them, then I suppose it wouldn't be as bad, if you'd known in advance.

BUT, you're seeing them and it was sprung on you, so I think YANBU.

As an aside, I remember my Mum being annoyed because a friend of hers stopped buying for us at 18, and Mum had bought until 21 for her children. It's obviously something that needs to be talked about!

atswimtwolengths · 25/04/2011 22:36

How could you buy for one child and not another? It's so mean, if you have the money, to deliberately not buy for a child.

My children are 22 and 19 and I still buy them Easter eggs, chocolate coins in their stockings, advent calendars, the lot!

Shoesytwoesy · 25/04/2011 22:37

how mean
ds is 19 he got eggs, he is still my child

BitOfFun · 25/04/2011 22:47

It's a bit tight, but I could well understand it in the context of a big family. We only buy for children, but OTOH we dont expect young skint adults to shell out just because they've turned 18.

sharbie · 25/04/2011 22:49

oh i have had to fight this year over this - mean. eggs are what £1 each.grrrr.

bananasinpjamas · 25/04/2011 23:17

I would buy eggs, xmas pressies & bday pressies as long as you got on and were nice. My dad got stockings at xmas until he was 46 so personally I dont think you are ever "too old" for these kind of things :P

sausagesandmarmelade · 26/04/2011 06:44

I say you're never too old for an easter egg...

Bought MIL and SIL (and her husband) a nice big one this easter...

and me and hubs got some lovely ones.

SpringFollows · 26/04/2011 07:18

In the circumstances the OP describes i would give the 18 year olds an egg for sure. It just seems a little mean - in money terms and also mean-spirited to not give them eggs when everyone else around them is getting them- and particularly if it is not previously understood that this is an agreed family policy. Even smaller eggs would have been appreciated I am sure.

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