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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to tell the estate agent the truth about why i wouldn't use his pet mortgage broker?

48 replies

microserf · 20/04/2011 22:11

i had an offer unexpectedly accepted on a house just before i went on hols. the agents called me at 3pm on the day before i went away. i told them i was going away the next day and i would sort out mortgage application when i got back. they tried to tell me to come up to meet with their guy at 4pm that day Shock to get mortgage sorted before i went. no way, i sorted it out on my own terms with my own adviser.

anyway... they want to now know why i wouldn't use their mortgage guy at all as he was (i) free and (ii) i had already met with him before the offer was accepted to discuss my situation.

the truth is: when i went to meet him, he told me it would be best if we listed mr serf first on the application. i saw red got a bit annoyed as mr serf had no interest in sorting out the details of mortgages and had in fact dumped it all delegated it to me. also, although he couldn't have known this, i am in fact the bigger earner. but at the time i said yeah fine, while inwardly thinking - you wanker, it's not 1950.

it annoyed me that since i was the only one who could be arsed sorting out a mortgage, he still insisted on using my husband's details first.

the agent wants feedback - should i tell him just how petty i am the truth?

OP posts:
Plumm · 20/04/2011 22:14

YANBU - tell him the reason, it's a ridiculous way to talk to a potential client.

caramelwaffle · 20/04/2011 22:16

Yanbu. Tell him it is 2011

TheyKnowEsperanto · 20/04/2011 22:18

YANBU I would tell them that when their mortgage broker is able to stop making ridiculously outdated and sexist assumptions about their potential clients is when he might start to get more business

MumInBeds · 20/04/2011 22:21

Tell them, they need to know how badly he's treating potential clients. It's not petty.

magicmummy1 · 20/04/2011 22:22

Yanbu. He needs to move out of the dark ages.

Tuggy · 20/04/2011 22:23

Christ almighty i'd be furious and DEFINATELY tell them and certainly point out that you're the higer earner.

wellwisher · 20/04/2011 23:47

Definitely tell them and let us know what weaselly response you get

Icelollycraving · 21/04/2011 08:15

Tell them. If they want feedback,give it. Remind them this is not 1950 & attitudes have moved on considerably,you moved on to another broker.

fanjolina · 21/04/2011 08:52

oh god yes, you have to tell him. I'd be fuming too!

HecateQueenOfTheNight · 21/04/2011 08:54

Oh yes. Certainly tell them.

cory · 21/04/2011 08:57

I would definitely give feedback on this one. If they recommend a mortgage broker who pisses their clients off it will reflect on them too- they need to know this.

TrillianAstra · 21/04/2011 08:58

I agree with cory - they won't want to be recommending someone who pisses off clients

NorfolkNChanceOfAnEgg · 21/04/2011 09:03

Definitely feedback. I was first on our mortgage because I was the higher earner, our broker (female) assumed nothing and was brilliant.

GnomeDePlume · 21/04/2011 09:03

Good grief.

We certainly dont get any of this. Probably helps that if we are doing something in joint names say at the bank DH always makes sure that I sit in the 'power seat'. As soon as the functionary starts talking to DH he will stop them straight away with the words 'talk to her, she's the money'.

Tell them that saying that it is 'best' if your DH is put first on the form is sexist nonesense. Any financial adviser still doing this is seriously behind the times and will not necessarily be up to date in other areas of their advice.

fedupofnamechanging · 21/04/2011 09:05

I think you should have said something to the man at the time.

That aside, you don't have to explain or justify your reasons for doing anything to the estate agent. They work for you, although I sometimes think estate agents forget who is actually paying them. You also have the right to sort out mortgage applications when it suits you rather than them.

But, I do think you should have spoken up and not wimped out at the time. I had a similar situation with my bank, when I said I was a SAHM and the twatman on the phone said that I just spend all of DHs money and does he have a propblem with that. I told him that in our house we have division of labour and 'DH's' money is mine, just as much as responsibility for our children are his.

fedupofnamechanging · 21/04/2011 09:05

problem, not propblem

fedupofnamechanging · 21/04/2011 09:07

Have just applied for a new mortgage. I am first on the application because I was the one answering all the questions on the phone. I don't think it really matters who is first or second applicant - the mortgage company is only likely to care that as a household you have sufficient income to repay the loan.

edam · 21/04/2011 09:07

You've had a lucky escape. Mortgage brokers attached to estate agents often don't get you the best deal anyway. They are usually tied to a few mortgage providers rather than looking at the whole market. And will recommend the mortgage provider that gives them the fattest commission rather than the one that's best for you. (Although I'm sure any mortgage brokers tied to agents who are MNers are entirely reputable.)

edam · 21/04/2011 09:08

Oh, and there's usually a deal with the estate agents too. Money changes hands that you aren't told about but ultimately you are paying for.

SkinittingFluffyBunnyBonnets · 21/04/2011 09:12

YANBU and you will be doing him a favour if you tell him.....the broker is an antique and every woman I know would be livid at this.

SkinittingFluffyBunnyBonnets · 21/04/2011 09:14

karma "I don't think it matters*

Then why was the broker so insistant?

blueshoes · 21/04/2011 09:16

Agree with Edam. Never used tied mortgage brokers - no good will come of it. Always arrange the mortgage separately with independent brokers.

SkinittingFluffyBunnyBonnets · 21/04/2011 09:16

Gnome I love that....I bet you and he have pulled the rug out from many people as they assume.

fedupofnamechanging · 21/04/2011 09:26

Skinitting, I would have thought that the higher earner would be applicant one. however I am a SAHM and because I made the mortgage enquiry and spent hours on the phone, I have been listed as applicant one on the mortgage application. I think it doesn't matter, because they will be looking at total household income and the mortgage is in joint names, so both applicants liable for repayment whoever is listed first and second.

I think the OP's broker was just being sexist and out of date.

GnomeDePlume · 21/04/2011 09:27

Skinitting it's the underlying assumption which is so annoying. These days we see less and less of it so when it does occur the dinosaurs should be shown the error of their ways.