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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be apalled at this display of piss poor parenting?

119 replies

MaisyMooCow · 19/04/2011 17:11

Today I was queuing in the Post Office. Close by was a woman with her DS of around 12-14 months in his pram. The baby was playing with a Tesco plastic carrier bag!!! His mother had given it to him to play with. He was pulling it to his face and then pushing it up in the air. For a few seconds at a time it lay across his face. The mother just stood there sorting through some papers and dipping in and out of her handbag. I watched with jaw touching the floor, I couldn't believe how stupid she was. Then, she takes it from him, puts stuff into it and puts it back in the rack under the pram.

And if that wasn't bad enough, as they passed me she put a Snickers bar into his hand !!!!

I was so tempted to go and say something but feared the response I may have got from her. I think had she continued to let him play with the carrier bag for any longer I would have definitely of gone up to her.

I feel so sorry for that poor child.

OP posts:
Insomnia11 · 19/04/2011 17:37

I sometimes let mine play with a bag as a distraction in that situation, under supervision. DD1 loved plastic bags for some reason, though I didn't have them lying around the house so she could pick them up when I didn't know about it. DD2 prefers to prance around with my handbag.

exhausted2011 · 19/04/2011 17:38

of course it's not pisspoor parenting
she obviously gave the child the bag to distract/amuse it. She didn't leave the child playing with it.
and did you see the child eat the snickers bar?
or again, did she give it to the child to distract/amuse it

MaisyMooCow · 19/04/2011 17:42

exhausted she may have given it to him to amuse him but she had her back turned towards the counter while she was messing with paperwork. There were other toys hanging from the pram, surely they would have been more suitable. I just think it's not really a good idea to encourage kids to play with plastic bags.

I can see people on here don't agree but I'd rather be safe than sorry.

OP posts:
PigeonPie · 19/04/2011 17:46

Maisy I think you were right to be worried - I would have been too. Plastic bags actually frighten me since I saw my nephew try to put one on his head as a joke - I don't think I had moved so fast for ages. Plastic bags are off limits in our house.

berrieberrie · 19/04/2011 17:49

Jeeeeeeeeeees I am scared to leave the house with people judging stuff like this! Oh no, wait a minute... i don't give a crap. Ha.

heliumballoons · 19/04/2011 17:50

I agree a carrier bag isn't the best distraction for a young child as there are dangers attached to it..... but... she was there and you have said 'piss poor parenting' which it isn't. It's purely a mis judgement at most.

TBH I would have thought the snickers bar posed more risk. Again though if closed maybe the sound of the wrapper being similar to the carrier bag is amusing for the chid.

YAB a teeny BU

alemci · 19/04/2011 17:51

I would have been concerned too. you are being sensible and so what if it does sound judgey, young children and plastic bags are not a good combination

MaisyMooCow · 19/04/2011 17:52

helium the snickers was unwrapped. The poor little thing was wacking it against his forehead! Maybe more at risk of knocking himself out that suffocation !

OP posts:
BalloonSlayer · 19/04/2011 17:54

Roffle at all the posters on here who say they wouldn't judge someone giving their child a plastic bag to play with.

OP, YANBU.

DH and I were at a hospital appointment with DS1 when a woman came in with a child of about 2 who needed a blood test. The child was chewing on an uninflated balloon, had it right inside her mouth as if it was chewing gum. DH and I were wincing in horror, as it's the sort of thing we would never do due to a fear of choking. We both thought to ourselves maybe we are a bit fussy and worry too much.

The nurse came to do the blood test and before she had even started the wee tot went berserk, running away all round the room. The woman remained in her seat calmly reading a magazine while the nurse chased the little girl all round thr room, wheedled, persuaded, chased again. Didn't offer to help at all. We thought maybe the woman had needle phobia, but still . . . Confused

ginhag · 19/04/2011 17:57

Ha ha... When I read 'piss poor parenting' and then the first line referred to a post office queue I was racking my brains to try and remember what I did when queuing at the PO today and whether I could've been stealthily observed by a mn'er.

Luckily I had 2 kids with me, neither that age, and no carrier bags :)

EvenLessNarkyPuffin · 19/04/2011 17:58

I wouldn't say piss poor, but when bags often have 'keep out of reach of babies/small children due to risk of suffocation' printed on them, it's pretty stupid parenting

RitaMorgan · 19/04/2011 17:59

I let my 8 month old play with carrier bags, don't see the problem.

MaisyMooCow · 19/04/2011 18:00

I like to use the words piss poor because they sound good together.

I'll blame MN because it's where I first saw the phrase! :)

OP posts:
berrieberrie · 19/04/2011 18:00

But the mum was WITH the kid...? She was hardly going to let it suffocate in front of her very eyes was she?

MaisyMooCow · 19/04/2011 18:02

berrie maybe not this time but if she's letting the child know it's ok to play with bags then next time when she's not around she may not be so lucky.

As other posters have said, bags should be off limits. They have a warning on them for this very reason.

OP posts:
suwoo · 19/04/2011 18:03

Are all Manchester residents potentially violent with piss poor parenting skills, Maisy, or just the one you describe?

Just wondering

BalloonSlayer · 19/04/2011 18:07

I tie all empty plastic carrier bags in our house in a knot so they can't go over a head. I sometimes do this at other people's houses, to their bemusement.

I shall be still doing it when the DCs are in their 50s. I just know.

I also keep the nappy bags somewhere out of reach of small children. Unfortunately this is also out of the convenient reach of adults who desperately need a nappy bag in a hurry because they are holding a foul dripping nappy they could sell to science. Grin

washnomore · 19/04/2011 18:07

Hey, OP, come round to mine tomorrow and I'll give you some proper AIBU fodder. Can you pick up some chips on your way over? It's just that little Kaylee-Marie has gone right off kebabs, the fussy little beggar.

MaisyMooCow · 19/04/2011 18:08

suwoo - From experience I think twice about getting involved so as to avoid a verbal tirade of abuse. You can approach people with the best of intentions but sometimes they don't see it that way.

OP posts:
SardineQueen · 19/04/2011 18:08

Oh honestly!

Biscuit
EvenLessNarkyPuffin · 19/04/2011 18:09

No Suwoo, but they all have a particular preference for picking potentially contentious topics.

suwoo · 19/04/2011 18:14

Do they puffin? I don't usually.

EvenLessNarkyPuffin · 19/04/2011 18:15

[pout] Don't appreciate my lovely alliteration then,

Pepa · 19/04/2011 18:16

btw parenting aside any chance you could refrain from Mancunian bashing - really not needed and says more about you than you might realise

GabbyLoggon · 19/04/2011 18:16

There is a lot of poor parenting about. (Bound to be almost everyone has kids at some stage)

there are a few hard and fast rules. (Dont push your kid up the chimney)

But some parents make it up as they go along or get advice from their parents.

I am sceptical about Jo Frost-type TV series on rearing children (Tough Love is a contradiction in terms) Pinched from the people across the pond.