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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To continue to live in social housing

140 replies

dealer · 17/04/2011 15:10

Think I probably am unreasonable, but also think I'd be crazy to do anything else.

I have been previously in severe need, hence why I'm in social housing at all. I now work full time, self-employed, earning approx 17k per year, dh earns 6k part time, and also is doing an ou degree. This means that while we are by no means living in luxury, we could in theory support ourselves in private rental. Obviously we're nowhere near being able to buy.

Our rent is about half what it would be on the open market. If we moved, we would definitely have to move to a cheaper area, which would be doable for work, but the children would have to change schools. The social housing that we live in is just one row on the edge of a private estate, so few social problems compared to large city estates. The areas that we might be able to afford to live in have much higher levels of problems. These are areas that I would happily have accepted a house in, when desperate, but now I feel I'd be stupid to move my 3 settled dcs there with the added risks involved.

With my rent doubling, we would have to get rid of 1 car. We have 2 because I have to drive for up to 10 hours per day for my work. Therefore dh would have to go without. He works in the more expensive area so would have to use public transport to get in, he does shift work, so not sure how feasible that would be. I would probably have to collect him at midnight a lot. With having to change all 3 schools (secondary, primary and nursery) I suspect their travel arrangements would be a problem too. The schools in this town are very full so they would probably end up all over the place. Of course many people manage this sort of thing all the time, but again I'd be daft to do so if not necessary.

I believe that social housing, and cheap rents should be for those in great need, as I once was, so feel I should vacate this property. However, I don't feel I would be doing my best for my children if I did so. I also don't trust the authorities to prioritise those in greatest need. I waited 5 years to be housed adequately although homeless with a young baby, while my severely disabled first husband had to live in a residential home. He was also terminally ill, and I believe that the council dragged their feet in the hope he would die before they had to house us. A friend of mine was housed within 6 weeks because they classed her as overcrowded because there were 4 generations living together. They were living in an enormous 5-bed house with seperate annexe.

So AIBU to stay in this very cheap house, 10 mins walk from the beach, which saves us at least £5000 a year?

OP posts:
dealer · 17/04/2011 16:02

I don't understand what you mean. I don't claim housing benefit.

OP posts:
PeachyAndTheArghoNauts · 17/04/2011 16:04

I know, but what I am saying is if it's allowed then it's hardly a massive sum is it? In real terms.

mamatomany · 17/04/2011 16:09

True mama but I confess to advising my mate to slow things down before moving in with ehr new fiance

Yes to slowing things down but to move in and then leave that house empty, how long is she going to give it ? 3 months, a year, 5 years.
Bloody criminal people should be prosecuted for it because I wouldn't mind betting she wouldn't be doing it if she was paying rent on it either.

AlpinePony · 17/04/2011 16:10

Your attitude is reflected all around us: "I believe in cuts... but not for me.".

RitaMorgan · 17/04/2011 16:12

Should be criminal to leave any house empty - don't many cities have more empty properties than people on the housing list? And don't get me started on people with bloody holiday homes destroying communities...

PeachyAndTheArghoNauts · 17/04/2011 16:18

Ap who was that to? Confused
if me my friend has been on prozac for last decade, just ebaten anorexia, husband just out of jail- I am scared for her mental health by jumping into a relationship with someone twice her age so very quickly indeed, with 2 small dds in tow. SSD are watching ehr as it is (exH a sex offender).

I don't know how long for tbh mama; until they are past the first flush I guess. Saying that she hasn't listened anyway and I just pray she's got it right this time as she woudl lose the kids if she were homeless I bet, been borderline for too long what with the eating disorder (kept collpasing when just her and them).

(I didn;t suggest she leave house empty mind, just not move in at all- agree that empty houses are a terrible thing).

MotherSnacker · 17/04/2011 16:21

Don't leave, you children have what they deserve, a stable home.

It's not your fault there is a shortage, the govt needs to build more to make up for the disasterous right to buy policy. People shouldn't have to leave their homes and communities.

And it is YOUR home. It may be the council's HOUSE but it is your HOME.

Earlybird · 17/04/2011 16:28

I don't think you sound like a martyr. Most here would (and have) advise you to stay put, as you have got such a good situation.

No doubt, you would have a big life change if you moved out and attempted to support your family on the 'open market'.

On the one hand, it is easy to say 'why would you do that to yourself/your family'? On the other hand, your circumstances have changed for the better, and probably will improve more when your dh is qualified/employed in his new profession. So, I think it is morally right to wonder if you should continue to receive 'help' to such a degree - especially as some of your friends with similar situations do not receive the help you do, and are struggling.

You have got the 'system' to work for you (as it should have in your time of need) - but at what point are you 'working the system'? I think it is right that the question be asked.

Again - displaying my ignorance on the subject -
do people have to declare/show income in order to qualify for social housing?

Do people have to declare/show income in order to remain in social housing long term?

Are people reassessed at some juncture?

If no, why would anyone ever move out? It is a sweet deal if you are upwardly mobile.

StuckinTheMiddlewithYou · 17/04/2011 16:32

Income, savings and assets in general are irrelevent when it comes to eligibility for social housing.

I have a deposit for a small house saved up - but no job security. So I decided last year to apply for social housing in the mean time. I hate renting privately and have no intention of doing so, when I have job security I will buy my own home.

Stay where you are.

AlpinePony · 17/04/2011 16:33

Peach - it was to OP.

PeachyAndTheArghoNauts · 17/04/2011 16:34

do people have to declare/show income in order to qualify for social housing?
Do people have to declare/show income in order to remain in social housing long term?
Are people reassessed at some juncture?
If no, why would anyone ever move out? It is a sweet deal if you are upwardly mobile

currently no but already in proess of being changed, as lifelong tenancies also come to an end.

You get points for social housing- so if someone who say was same age as us,etc applied and we did as well we'd get far more points due to having a couple of kids with disabilities. But someone homeless would get mroe and beat us every time; only those with most points get housed so it is quite possible to languish on bottom of list for a lifetime as there will always be needy people coming through ahead of you.

StuckinTheMiddlewithYou · 17/04/2011 16:34

Alp, that still doesn't make any sense!

PeachyAndTheArghoNauts · 17/04/2011 16:36

Fair enough AP; I think you may have got it wrong then, becuase rather than saying cuts for everyone not us, she was actually asking which is the opposite no?

I woudl guesstimate that on a low income with signs of some improvements (her DPs study) it's best to stick about for a few more years then go elsewhere becuase being in private on a low icnome puts you at high risk of needing state hosuing if anything goes awry anyway, and that vcosts the country £££££ to sort. Far better get oneself secure then move on.

dealer · 17/04/2011 16:42

Didn't realise that was to me. Peachy is right, I was actually saying that I feel I should be suffering more. Even though I didn't mention cuts, I don't think I would be able to moan if they suddenly increased our rent by a lot to make up the shortfall.

Despite the fact that I feel maybe I shouldn't be in social housing, I would be pretty miffed if they tried to evict us. I think a rent rise would be resonable, but not an eviction. Maybe that's just me being entitled though.

OP posts:
StuckinTheMiddlewithYou · 17/04/2011 16:46

Of course you should be in social housing. I live in a block of flats, most of the occupants work and at least one is studying for a degree. Don't let media-driven stereotypes rule your conscience.

mamatomany · 17/04/2011 16:46

If no, why would anyone ever move out? It is a sweet deal if you are upwardly mobile.

I moved out because the locality wasn't great, some people my immediate neighbors were fantastic but the police helicopters at 2am lose their novelty quite quickly.

MotherSnacker · 17/04/2011 16:48

No that's you being ridiculous.

You want less money? You don't earn a lot as it is. Perfectly reasonable that you should have the rent you do. More people should have it, instead of the terrible stress they have meeting their housing costs.

reelingintheyears · 17/04/2011 16:49

Baroness Uddin should move out of her social housing..

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 17/04/2011 16:49

Stay where you are - you have suffered enough if you were homeless with a baby and a terminally ill husband. You and your family deserve this. It's not as if you are earning megga bucks. 10 mins from beach - how lovely for your children. You owe it to them to stay put. What would happen if (and it could easily happen in today's climate ) you lost your job and were in private rental - you could up homeless again and struggling to be rehoused - not a good move for your young family.

PeachyAndTheArghoNauts · 17/04/2011 16:51

I do think there is an srgument for rents in social housing to be variable Dealer; my aprents are in social housing, they were through my childhood when we were probably best off on estate (though not by any means rolling In it- no cars or foreign trips, but Dad working extremely long hours etc). Their paln was to stash every penny spare in a pension and use a significant amount to buy a bungalow to retire in and leave the council house free.

Now, Dad's pensions collapsed, a bit ossue where we come from that ahs left many people penniless in their old age (think small town, big two employers...). Mum and dad won;t ahve that bungalow and are now thanking every lucky star possible that they never made the choice to private rent as they'd have been back in state housing like a shot and without teh chance to have done things like install central heating etc (they would downgrade to a smaller place but there aren't any locally to them and theyc an't drive to where the sheltered estates are as a well they cannot drive! B Dad works PT and needs to be able to cycle to work, and C Mum cares for Grandad who is 90 but whilst he's still healthy and independent-ish (no old age issues but undiagnosed ASD ones) he can't last forever)

I would suggest more houses would be freed up for the needy by building communities that included large, small and elderly-suitable housing so people could move about as their life changes without having to hand over their entire community, care and support systems etc.

EricNorthmansMistress · 17/04/2011 16:51

And you can't upsize if your family grows. I have friends who have council tenancies which they won't give up but have two or three DCs in one bed flats. My best friend is fortunate to have a 2 bed bungalow with a garden, she has 3 DCs. The house is really very small but she is happyto pay 1/3 of market rates for a small house.

MotherSnacker · 17/04/2011 16:52

A house by the beach?

Why shouldn't someone who works hard liive near the beach. The beauty of gods earth is for us all not just the rich. What's morally wrong is the children of the working poor growing up on the 10th floor of a tower block with lifts that stink of piss.

RitaMorgan · 17/04/2011 16:52

And if you lost your job and had to claim housing benefit in private rental you'd be costing the taxpayer loads of money!

Why would people move out of social housing? If you get to the point where you can afford to buy somewhere most people would do that I expect.

welshbyrd · 17/04/2011 16:54

a council tenant here, We pay the £82 week rent ourselves, and all the council tax, I dont consider us poor, but by no means are we rich, if we went private our rent would double, we are comfortable at mo, but it would not stay that way if we moved
Stay where you are, you and your family are stable, that's why council houses exist, I think Hmm

PeachyAndTheArghoNauts · 17/04/2011 16:55

'What's morally wrong is the children of the working poor growing up on the 10th floor of a tower block with lifts that stink of piss.
' It's wrong any child should grow up like that; children should never be blamed for their parent's failings (or of course other needs- could as easily be ill, carers etc I guess). Just it's harder to help some groups than others. So you could realitically help working poor into some home schemes outside the pure state sector whereas it's hard to do that with people on 100% HB.

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