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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not buy my children Easter eggs or Easter presents?

90 replies

brassick · 17/04/2011 10:12

My children obviously think so!

They get gifts and/or eggs from relatives, in fact I have always asked that if relatives wanted to buy them something for Easter that it be a gift rather than chocolate. But I have never seen the need to buy them anything myself.

My dd's do not want for anything & I don't see why I should be guilted into buying them chocolate (which I do buy them anyway more or less every week) or gifts for a Christian festival which we do not celebrate, being non-religious, and which, like many of these festivals, have been turned into a consumer fest.

I don't think I've come across anyone else in real life who doesn't buy their children anything at Easter-IABU? And is there anyone else out there like me?

OP posts:
worraliberty · 17/04/2011 10:15

It's a novely egg...it's fun. I don't think it deserves any kind of deep thinking.

My neighbours are Hindu and they celebrate Easter and Xmas with small chocolates and small gifts.

LadyOfTheManor · 17/04/2011 10:15

I don't buy Easter gifts and we are Christians. Easter isn't about eggs. I suspect you shall get a flood of parents come and defend the right to buy eggs...Pagan or otherwise.

OP, do you celebrate Christmas on the same notion that you are "non-religious"?

Goblinchild · 17/04/2011 10:19

You have the right to parent how you will. How old are your children?
It's a bit of a non-issue if they are getting eggs and chocolates from relatives.

HecateQueenOfTheNight · 17/04/2011 10:20

I'm not like you. we celebrate it. but I agree with you. If you don't believe in Jesus then don't celebrate his resurection.

Or his birth, for that matter...

Or you could just celebrate the pagan festivals which were both nicked by christians seeking to destroy paganism by hanging Christmas and Easter over existing pagan festivals. Yule (christmas) and the festival celebrating Eostre, the goddess of fertility and birth (easter)

Or, you could say to your kids that if they want to celebrate easter, they can begin by a church service, after which there will be easter eggs...

SmethwickBelle · 17/04/2011 10:21

We don't tend to get them, DSs are a bit small to really pick up on it at this age and we don't buy them for each other. Maybe when they're bigger we'll get them an egg or two so they can "join in". Not remotely religious but would frame it in terms of spring/new life etc...

NestaFiesta · 17/04/2011 10:21

You grumpy old sausage, buy them a flipping egg and stop overthinking it.

Original poster
brassick · 17/04/2011 10:23

Fair point, I suppose the non-religious thing is a bit of a red herring, I do celebrate Christmas (although spend a lot less on my children than most families I know-both those above and below us on the income scale).

My main gripe is that there is this sudden expectation of 100's of eggs AND presents, which is now seen as the norm. I can't stand this competition that kids seem to get into about how many eggs they got-some kids I know get 15-20 eggs. It's absolute madness.

At least there is a (vague and v tenuous I know) link between gifts and Christmas-I maintain that Easter has become commercialised for the good of the retailers, and I refuse to get drawn in.

Even if it does mean my kids hate me & everyone else thinks I'm wierd.

OP posts:
ColonelBrandonsBiggestGroupie · 17/04/2011 10:23

YANBU. We only started doing it once they were big enough to notice that we weren't doing it - if that makes sense! Then again, any excuse to buy books... A book each and a packet of mini eggs to share - sorted!

Original poster
brassick · 17/04/2011 10:25

They are 11 & 14, & I don't think I've ever bought either of them an Easter egg.

OP posts:
SpringchickenGoldBrass · 17/04/2011 10:25

I buy them for DS because we both like easter eggs (for some reason the chocolate easter eggs are made out of always seems totaste different and nicer). But we just buy them and eat them when we feel like it.

Goblinchild · 17/04/2011 10:26

Not wanting overkill is different.
Mine have always had an egg and a small gift. Not multiple eggs, and I certainly never bought them chocolate every week.
We mark special days in the year with treats precisely because we don't do it every day or every week.

Original poster
brassick · 17/04/2011 10:27

My kids' friends get (from their parents) things like some new clothes, a couple of DVDs & 2 or 3 Easters eggs. Madness!

OP posts:
5inthebed · 17/04/2011 10:28

I can't undersatnd why you would buy presents for Easter? I buy my Dc and egg or two, but a present? No way.

I can remember a few girls at school used to get tons of presents at Easter, probably about the same amout they got for Christmas. Spoilt!

worraliberty · 17/04/2011 10:28

I don't personally know any kids who expect '100s of eggs and presents'

Mine know they'll get eggs or money from both sets of GPs and the same from us...that's about it really Confused

At least there is a (vague and v tenuous I know) link between gifts and Christmas-I maintain that Easter has become commercialised for the good of the retailers, and I refuse to get drawn in.

Christmas is the most over commercialised thing ever Grin

jojowest · 17/04/2011 10:29

ive never ever given anyone an easter present. One egg is appropriate imo

Goblinchild · 17/04/2011 10:31

Depends on the present, and its relevance to spring, new life and new beginnings.
Doesn't always have to be materialistic plastic crap.

HecateQueenOfTheNight · 17/04/2011 10:32

I don't know about expect but mine certainly WANT 100s of easter eggs Grin

Great big load of tough shit, mind.

Original poster
brassick · 17/04/2011 10:35

I know Christmas is over commercialised, but I realise I would be fighting a losing battle on that one. Believe me, if I could get away without being dragged into the Christmas madness I would. I just don't want to be involved in letting Easter go the same way (not in my house anyway).

I do think that dd1 has some very materially-minded friends, whose parents always seem to be spending on them in ridiculous amounts (eg a set of twins whose mother bought them both iPods for their birthday as the Uggs-not fake Uggs either-that she had ordered them hadn't arrived & she didn't want them to have nothing on their birthday. This was their 14th birthday, not their 4th!). So I guess we are being measured against an extreme.

OP posts:
greencaveman · 17/04/2011 10:36

If they are 11 and 14 and unhappy about it, I can imagine them whinging into adulthood about it..."my parents never got me an easter egg...". Seeing as their peers probably receive a present/an egg/whatever, I would follow suit to avoid them thinking that you are a mean parent as any little thing can make them think that at that age.

Mind you, I have gone plenty of easters without buying my kids an egg but they have never known as uncle and gps get them an egg. This year, they will know (5 and 3) so they have a small £1 ish egg each from us with their fav characters on.

Reality · 17/04/2011 10:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IWillCountToThree · 17/04/2011 10:38

I always got a book for easter, and i've continued that with my dcs. They don't get eggs from us but they do from school, friends, Brownies, and Church!

I'd rather get them something they can keep than spend daft money on something that's gone in 20 seconds.

Original poster
brassick · 17/04/2011 10:39

So if I follow suit so they don't feel bad about getting Easter eggs, what does that teach them? If they whinge enough they will get what they want eventually?!?

These are not deprived children we are talking about. Dd2 is going to Paris with her choir this year & hopefully to America next year. dd1 is going to South Africa with her school in 2013. They get plenty every day of every year.

OP posts:
HecateQueenOfTheNight · 17/04/2011 10:41

I assume they get pocket money? If they want an easter egg so badly, why don't they just go out and buy one?

edam · 17/04/2011 10:44

Who buys Easter presents for heaven's sake? Feel like turning into my Grandma, pursing my lips and hoisting my bosom in disapproval.

Anyone who doesn't let their child have a choccy egg, on the other hand, is rather mean.

My Dad went to France once just before Easter and came back with French chocolates. Mine was an Easter hen with Easter shellfish inside. Am still puzzled by that 30 years later.

Original poster
brassick · 17/04/2011 10:45

Dd1 has had about 5 eggs from her friends & they will no doubt get them from relatives. And yes, they do have pocket money & could buy their own. But they feel outraged at that suggestion!

To be fair to the dds, they know me v well & although they moan, they realise that when I say no I mean it, so they know they are fighting a losing battle. But as teenagers (well teen & almost-teen) it is their duty to feel aggrieved.

OP posts:
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