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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To go back to drinking copious amounts of wine again?

49 replies

humanoctopus · 17/04/2011 00:28

I got so much support and helpful tips here in the past.

My life has been complicated, repeatedly.

I work very hard, had 3 jobs (I kid ye not) until I realised that I would die from exhaustion, (two actual located in reality jobs, one internet 2 hours 5 days per week stuff). People keep telling me that one should never shed an hours work during a recession, however, I just couldn't keep the non main jobs. I was falling into bed, creaking from tiredness.

After tax, the money was rubbish anyway.

Anyhoo, I had found that I drank way to much wine as a reward sedative to my lifestyle.

Life has stabilised. We have no great bills or draws on our income. Lots of stuff with the children, but nothing too difficult or unmanageable. My family continues to be difficult, but ok. I have terrific friends who love me and do all to support me.

As of yesterday, I really want to drink wine. Lots of. Don't know where this has come out of . I've finished a bottle of white. I'm a bit shocked at how easily its gone down.

Am thinking of opening more. What's going on here for me? I am perplexed at where this has come out of.

OP posts:

MavisEnderby · 17/04/2011 00:31

Leave it alone,please!

I found i was drinking far to much wine after dp died,seriously for first 6 months I was almost doing a bottle a night,not good.Have weaned self down.If you are susceptible don't go there!

(I am using mn as a distraction)just post a load of mad threads instead!!

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 00:33

if you feel you need to drink more then please don't. if you HAVE to then drink it and then wake up tomorrow and make an appointment to see your GP and ask them to refer you to a counsellor. Nothing to be ashamed of - many people fall into the trap of a quick release in a glass of wine that becomes something else (am a recovering alcoholic). Can you settle for a cup of hot chocolate? if you really REALLY cant then drink it and then PLEASE phone tomorrow and ask for help. Its much much easier to nip it at this stage than a year down the line. HONESTLY x

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 00:35

(i used to do 5 to 6 bottles a night and sometimes have to have a glass in the morning - PLEASE DONT LET IT ACCELERATE)

MavisEnderby · 17/04/2011 00:35

Keep talking,op,about anything at all..

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 00:37

same as Mavis. im here. keep talking.

AgentZigzag · 17/04/2011 00:39

It's how it escalates isn't it?

Drinking the first glasses makes you feel good/better and it becomes a routine, that you know there's a time approaching that's nigh on guaranteed to make you feel better.

As a one or even two off it's not so much a problem, but you need to recognise whether it's becoming a crutch and perhaps papering over cracks you might otherwise have tackled.

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 00:41

As AgentZig says we have all been at that point at some time or another - please respond OP. Lots of ladies here to help/support. Please believe i have been there - much further down the line than you are now - so let us shove you back up!

MavisEnderby · 17/04/2011 00:44

You there op??

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 00:47

here as long as you need to talk OP so dont sink into that bottle it wont help you in the morning TRUST ME! come on, talk to us x

AgentZigzag · 17/04/2011 00:47

I think of it as everybody's trying to get by the best they can, every single day.

If a glass of your tipple of choice helps you along, that's great.

But if the relief the alcohol can give to what is sometimes a pretty harsh world, is becoming a problem in itself, then that's the time to start questioning whether there are other ways of making yourself feel better.

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 00:50

i don't think she is coming back is she :-(

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 00:51

hun (OP) you dont have to spill your life story just say whatever you want if you are still here.

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 00:52

hey if it helps ive turned into my mother and am listening to david essex! how about you agentzig? anything embarassing?

Original poster

humanoctopus · 17/04/2011 00:52

Thanks.
I get through the day ok ish.

Its this time of the day/night that makes me want to drink.

Why.

Fed up with myself, for not going to bed, everyone here is asleep, all kids fed and watered, dh snoring.

Why the drive to drink?

OP posts:

MavisEnderby · 17/04/2011 00:53

still listening.You know what?Life is shit sometimes and it seems like the easy option..

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 00:56

because you are bored, it takes the edge of, it makes you feel relaxed, it lifts your head away from where you are. you dont really want to drink you just want something to take the edge off. you have to make a choice to pick other ways of taking the edge off. when you stop relying on it as a relaxation tool you do find other ways. baths, walks, listening to music, watching a favourite film. dont go or feel you cant talk because you CAN

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 00:57

it IS the easy option. its bloody great when you are in control of it and you know what? very few people are in control of it. i wasn't. i lost everything and please let me help you

Original poster

humanoctopus · 17/04/2011 00:59

But drinking wine is great.

I''ve been for a bath, don't want to go for a walk, and its too dangerous at night.

And it feels good/better.

OP posts:

AgentZigzag · 17/04/2011 01:00

You sound bored and in need of a bit more of something.

Do you not enjoy being on your own?

I mean does the drink enhance your otherwise good evening, or does it just make it bearable?

Original poster

humanoctopus · 17/04/2011 01:00

ExeterisEasy Please do help.

OP posts:

MavisEnderby · 17/04/2011 01:02

HO i really need to go to sleep now (dd up at 5ish and just me!) but i am sure eie will give you good tips.I drank too much wine as a crutch to get me through dark times but it hit me i was doing to much,i guess everyone realises their limit at some point.I went back to mn when i felt the hangovers were getting to me and have found here a really good distraction,just drink lots of juice instead,though have an occasional wine night.Hope you can find it the same but sending big hugs xxx

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 01:02

drinking wine is lovely of course it is. a nice fat glass in a big warm bubbly bath is lovely. the wine is NOT solving the problems you are feeling. it makes you feel that it is because it makes you not care! it makes you smile at things that normally would make you want to rip your skin off. please talk, why are you feeling like this?? and remember you are speaking to a woman who used to drink 6 bottles of wine a night. you are NOT alone.

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 01:02

dont ever think you are alone.

Original poster

humanoctopus · 17/04/2011 01:04

AgentZigzag I love being on my own.

I have lovely friends who have never seen me drunk. I am always the driver, etc.

I just get to the stage of the night when everyone is asleep, all jobs done, and it just feels great. Can't see what's wrong with that.

OP posts:

ExeterisEasy · 17/04/2011 01:05

if you are in control of it then there is nothing wrong with it for a second. are you in control of it?

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