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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want ds1 to go on an airplane at 3 years old?

72 replies

astragirl · 16/04/2011 20:10

Ds1's dad stated today that he wanted to take him on an airplane to Scotland for a wedding in August. He wants to pick him up on a Friday and bring him back on the Sunday (the dad doesn't live with us, long story, but sees him Saturday - Sunday every fortnight). Don't know why I'm stressing about it but am worried that for ds, like what if he doesn't enjoy it, what if he's scared? AIBU or should i just deal with it?

OP posts:
EricNorthmansMistress · 16/04/2011 21:18

YABVU! My DS loves going on planes. He has been doing it since 8 weeks old. Stop being so precious.

electra · 16/04/2011 21:18

I think YABU - there is no reason for him to be scared. Are you sure you're not projecting your own anxieties?

Tuggy · 16/04/2011 21:35

YABU

Kaekae · 16/04/2011 21:38

My son is three and has been on a plane a few times, the longest flight was to California and shortest to Scotland, he has always found it an adventure! They really do love it, I am sure you son will enjoy it.

backwardpossom · 16/04/2011 21:38

YABU but I suspect the issue isn't about the plane, but rather about his dad taking him.

Kaekae · 16/04/2011 21:38

*your

Onetoomanycornettos · 16/04/2011 21:44

I think backwardpossom is right, this is about dad taking him away. Actually, going by plane is very sensible plus amazingly exciting, I have flown with my two since they were tiny, and around this age, my dd1 used to shout 'pla, pla' at every blinking plane in the airport and of course there were hundreds...

It will be fine, you will be a bit anxious I guess with him away, but try not to pass that on, he will be very excited to both go on a plane and go away with his daddy.

ChippingInLovesEasterEggs · 16/04/2011 21:46

YABU

What is it you are really worried about? Are you scared of flying yourself? Or are you actually just a bit miffed he might have a really fab time with his Dad... which although not admirable, is somewhat understandable :/

In addition, I don't see why this is a 'he wants to' and not a 'he is' either - unless he's a feckless waste of space then why does he need your permission?

Onetoomanycornettos · 16/04/2011 21:51

Can I just add, though, I am sympathetic. I used to worry that something terrible would happen to my two when they went off with their dad on little holidays. I used to worry they would run off, or have a paddy and he wouldn't cope etc etc. The only way to get over this is to just do it. If he's already having him overnight for the weekend, he knows what three year olds are like and so a short trip away somewhere in the British Isles is a good way of getting over your fears which are irrational but understandable.

mellicauli · 16/04/2011 21:51

We took my son to New Zealand when he was 3. I figured it couldn't be worse than childbirth.

What a miscalculation that was!

He thought it was the most exciting thing he had ever done in his life. There's loads of boy to look at: security, baggage carousels, planes landing, taking off, baggage going on the plane, control towers, safety cards, fire engines.

If you are really worried, get a book that shows him all the things that happens. And have a few games of going to the airport and getting on th plane before hand. Then if he's the anxious type, he will know what to expect and can relax and enjoy it.

BelleDameSansMerci · 16/04/2011 21:55

Took my DD (then 2.11) to France on a plane last year. I was worried for all sorts of reasons. She loved it. Absolutely loved it.

I understand why you would be reticent, I really do, but I think you may be being a little unnecessarily anxious.

JustAnother · 16/04/2011 22:00

I travel a lot by plane with DS (now 7yo) and have been doing that since he was 3 months. In all these years, I don't recall seeing any scared todlers in a plane. They love it. Babies sometimes cry because of the ear pressure, but any child older than 1 seems to love it. You are worrying unnecessarily. Are you scared of flying yourself?

exoticfruits · 16/04/2011 22:01

He will love it. At that age we used to go to the airport to watch planes and he would have been thrilled. Don't spoil it for him by projecting your fears. (statistically he is much safer than travelling by car).

CoteDAzur · 16/04/2011 22:04

YABU. He will love it.

SoupDragon · 16/04/2011 22:06

He will be fine. So what if there's a chance he may hate it? Thats no reason not to let him experience things :)

Are you, in fact, worried about it for your sake rather than his? The fact that he'll be far away and on a plane or that you won't get to take him on his first flight?

Gemsy83 · 16/04/2011 22:11

I agree it seems to be about his Dad taking him than actually flying. Its his FATHER not Freddy Krueger ffs

NoWayNoHow · 16/04/2011 22:13

FFS, its just Scotland. I was expecting this thread to read something about your DS being really sick and you being about to fly to NZ or something.

My mate's kids have been flying around the world since birth (their dad's a pilot) - I genuinely can't see what the problem would be?

My DS is also 3 and he'd give his entire train collection for a chance to go on a real plane.

YADBU.

beanlet · 16/04/2011 22:16

Oh FFS. My DS 9 mths has been to LA and Australia so far. Was completely fine. YAB ridiculous.

MissalReadings · 16/04/2011 22:31

Of course you're being ridiculous unreasonable. Flying is loads of fun for a toddler - it's for the parents of toddlers that it's occasionally hell hard work!

Ds has flown relatively often, and he has always enjoyed it. Give him a sweetie to suck (or drink to sip from) on take-off, helps with the air pressure change.

chipmonkey · 16/04/2011 22:51

All my boys have flown since very young. Ds4 was 9 weeks old when we took him to Portugal.

At three, they loved it! It was so exciting and different. The stuff small boys love. Let him go!

TransatlanticCityGirl · 16/04/2011 23:26

Definitely being unreasonable. I can understand that you might have personal fears or worries about him going without you - whenever one of my loved ones goes on a plane (or drives late at night, or does anything that could possibly result in an accident no matter how unlikely) I fret a bit. And I know I'm being silly when I do it. Planes are super safe.

But you can't wrap your little boy up in cotton wool forever. It's time for him to expand his horizons. Let him experience life!

exoticfruits · 17/04/2011 07:18

I think this must be a record-everyone is in agreement!

Georgimama · 17/04/2011 07:49

No, there was that thread about the nanny giving the child ready made M&S pasta (that still makes me chuckle). But it's rare!

Original poster
astragirl · 17/04/2011 08:40

OK OK OK, didn't expect to get shouted at ffs! Thanks for the support.

OP posts:
gorionine · 17/04/2011 08:45

Who shouted at you? asside from the two last post who talk about the thread/another thread(withouut shouting), I can only see people who have given their own experience of flying with babies or toddler and told you it went fine and it was enjoyed.

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