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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be fed up of the double standard

30 replies

chocolatecoveredlissielou · 14/04/2011 17:48

we have been offered a new house, a 3 bed in a really nice village. it would mean changing ds's school and dh would have to change stores but on the up side, no more drug dealers on our front garden, ds would be going to a better school and a better overall standard of living. dh and i agreed not to tell anyone til we made up our mind, but today he spoke to his parents about it, i had told my parents we were shortlisted and when they asked if we heard i said we were viewing. dh and i had a row about it aibu

OP posts:
BooBooGlass · 14/04/2011 17:49

WHat does it matter?

worraliberty · 14/04/2011 17:49

Dunno whatever really

Is it a big enough deal to row about? Confused

Roseflower · 14/04/2011 17:49

'Offered' a house?

Tee2072 · 14/04/2011 17:50

So you also spoke to your parents about it, if you told them you were shortlisted.

I don't understand the issue.

Original poster
chocolatecoveredlissielou · 14/04/2011 17:50

sorry, am on phone. he went nuts because we "agreed" which is fine, and im not close to my parents. but i dont lie. you always get caught out and it seems daft to lie about something so silly

OP posts:
hardhatdonned · 14/04/2011 17:50

Housing Association i'd assume Roseflower.

You rowed about potentially moving to a better area? sod the upheaval i'd be there like a shot.

TheMonster · 14/04/2011 17:51

I presume she means a local authority housing association house or similar, reseflower.

It certainly doesn't seem like something worth arguing about, and it is wise for him to have discussed it, surely?

Chil1234 · 14/04/2011 17:51

YABU... you told your parents a lie, he told his the truth. Expect he was very excited about getting away from the drug dealers etc. OK so you had an agreement to tell no-one but it's not a life & death matter and hardly something to have a row about. Pick your battles more carefully.

usualsuspect · 14/04/2011 17:51

why don't you just tell them both ?

Roseflower · 14/04/2011 17:51

Right...

cheesesarnie · 14/04/2011 17:52

is it a big deal?you spoke to your parents and he spoke to his.they might have helpful opinions.

TheMonster · 14/04/2011 17:52

what has he lied about?

Are you a bit jealous because he is close to his parents?

Original poster
chocolatecoveredlissielou · 14/04/2011 17:52

roseflower, we are in a HA house. i dont know why he is so angry tbh

OP posts:
BooBooGlass · 14/04/2011 17:53

Maybe becaus eit seems petty and childish?

TheMonster · 14/04/2011 17:53

I don't really understand what you argued about.

Original poster
chocolatecoveredlissielou · 14/04/2011 17:54

sorry, neither of us has lied about anything. but he thinks i should have said nothing. as youve said, daft to row about so i dont understand why he is so angry about me telling them

OP posts:
TheMonster · 14/04/2011 17:56

So he discussed it with his parents and he thinks that is fine.

You told your parents, but not to discuss it, and not the truth.

There was no need for you to tell your parents unless you wanted to discuss it truthfully with them.

It's silly for him to be angry though.

grovel · 14/04/2011 17:56

This thread is too complicated for me. Wish I could help but I'm out of my depth.

Original poster
chocolatecoveredlissielou · 14/04/2011 17:57

sorry, its really ahrd to mn from my phone. he didnt want to tell anyone, then told his parents but got cross when i told mine.

OP posts:
Chil1234 · 14/04/2011 17:57

You're not making sense. Originally you said he told his parents about the offer whereas you told yours you were just viewing. All sounds like a storm in a teacup to be honest. Stress is probably causing people to snap...

cheesesarnie · 14/04/2011 18:01

are you going to move then?

can/do people ever refuse a council house then?are you only allowed to refuse a certain amount of times?

ShirleyKnotThroneOfJudgement · 14/04/2011 18:03

YANBU.

I think.

TheVisitor · 14/04/2011 18:05

Is he scared that you won't get it and didn't want too many people to know in case it doesn't happen?

Original poster
chocolatecoveredlissielou · 14/04/2011 18:06

exactly! its a daft thing to get upset about. although we do have a lot going on.

cheesesarnie. you need a good reason, if its not practical etc, but if i get my way, yep! i hate it where we are. i hate that ds cant go out in our garden because of the neighbours. and our current house is far too small, esp if this bean sticks

OP posts:
Original poster
chocolatecoveredlissielou · 14/04/2011 18:08

thevisitor, possibly. although she said its ours if we want it!

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