i genuinely want to know..

[fluffles]

before i start i want to say my DH is really lovely and has bought me flowers because i was upset last night but he doesn't see that he's done anything wrong and although i'm not annoyed anymore i want to know if you think IWBU to be upset...

so, i do some voluntary work, i do enjoy it but it involves hard work and responsibility for other people's children.

last year, we had a weekend away - me in charge of lots of kids, very hard work, voluntary and rewarding but not exactly a 'holiday'. DH couldn't bear the thought of being left alone all weekend so arranged a weekend away with two mates, which was fine, but he was an hour late picking me up after my weekend and i was waiting with my kit by the side of a road in the dark as everybody else had packed up and gone

this year, i said, for goodness sake leave me the car! so he has, but he emailed all our joint friends to say he was being left alone and did any of them want to go away with him an they all said yes so now all our joint friends and him are having a long weekend away (longer than my trip). i said i was a bit annoyed about this as it would probably be the only weekend away of the summer that 'the group' could all make and he'd deliberately made it the weekend i was busy. he thinks IABVU and that he shouldn't have to sit at home alone.

So... AIBU to be upset and feel left out???

[for the record, he has now bought flowers, i have stopped being upset but still think IWNU to be upset, and of course they're all still going]

and apparently I "have slanging matches in the street" because I suggested that OP should speak to her husband about his dickish behaviour instead of joining him in his passive-aggressive game-playing, using a group of friends as pawns in said games

oh well

and he is a lovely husband after all

and bought some flowers

so all is fabulous

he is still a dick, though, not sure how we explain that one away

who said "leave him" ??

I think I've done you an injustice EggyFucker and painted you as some common fishwife, I thought you were arguing for sending the email.

It was the image of crisps in your DHs underpants that made me do it.

Behiiiiind yoooooou MAry

I am arguing against involving the friends at all, it is none of their business and makes you look like as much of pillock as him

I am saying have a quiet word with your husband and ask him why he has organised a trip with friends when he is positive you are not free to attend

Admittedly, the thought of my DH in pants eating crisps, watching Dave re-runs of Top Gear is enough to fry anyone's eyesight

a pillock

and by "quiet" word, I actually mean firm, steely-eyed word, in case that wasn't clear

and yes, AnyFucker would kick his ass ! < ahem >

How could he possibly know they would all be available?
He was just looking for some company which seems fair enough. I can imagine you being frustrated that the one weekend all your friends are free is the weekend you are not free, but that is no one's fault.
So you are NBU to feel a bit sad, but YABU to blame your husband.