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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Parents evening. Should she be telling me this!?

40 replies

FilerDad · 10/04/2011 22:47

I was attending parents evening for DD (reception) without my wife (She had to work) And DD teacher started talking to me about more personal things (including that she was going to be going on a night out the following Friday evening because she'd been single too long) Anyway, she's always very reserved with me when I'm around my wife (though she is friendly) but she kept touching my hand over the table and our appointment time went well over the 15 minutes everyone else had (she had also asked to swap my time to the very end, around 7, AFTER the reply card was marked that only I would be attending. Long story short, she basically gave my kid a good review, and ended up giving me her PERSONAL mobile number for if I wanted to speak any more on the matter. I carefully probed the other parents the enxt day and nobody mentioned any giving of numbers. Anyway, she's a very attractive younger teacher but for some reason (even though I know I've done nothing wrong) feel terribly guilty about the whole thing and havent told my wife a lot of the details (I said it went along normally and didnt mention the number giving). So, long story short, AIBU to think this is a matter that I should escalate?

OP posts:
FabbyChic · 10/04/2011 22:49

She fancies you and wants you to call her. Jeeez you should tell your wife the teacher came onto you.

Goblinchild · 10/04/2011 22:50

Why didn't you tell her she was being inappropriate at the time, and that you felt uncomfortable with it?
Talk to the head, the teacher sounds very foolish. You may have to provide evidence, such as her mobile number to back up your tale.

queenbathsheba · 10/04/2011 22:50

escalate? depends what is meant by that. Are you flattered?

hairfullofsnakes · 10/04/2011 22:51

Very unprofessional - for goodness sake tell your wife everything now and think about reporting the woman in question

Tell your wife now!

Goblinchild · 10/04/2011 22:51

However gorgeous you are, she should be able to maintain a professional detachment.

ShatnersBassoon · 10/04/2011 22:51

Sounds like a fantasy.

heliumballoons · 10/04/2011 22:51

I'd send her a text daily at 3.30pm asking if your DD had a good day. She'll soon regret it. Grin

queenbathsheba · 10/04/2011 22:52

If you tell your wife what is she likely to do. Is it worth ruinning this young womens whole career?

bisybackson · 10/04/2011 22:52

My first ever Biscuit

Congratulations.

MadameDefarge · 10/04/2011 22:52

yeah. sounds like bollocks. Mr First Time Poster.

squeakytoy · 10/04/2011 22:53

I would do nothing and say nothing. All it will do is stir up trouble. She fancies you, you dont fancy her, and even if you did are happily married. She will have got the message if you havent rung her.

Merryleggs · 10/04/2011 22:53

....and then you woke up...

catchmeifyoucan · 10/04/2011 22:53

Definitely a half baked fantasy.

Original poster
FilerDad · 10/04/2011 22:55

If it were a fantasy I'd be doing a lot more than feeling sheepish about it!

And I never said I was gorgeous, I said she was young and attractive, not me!

I just knwo my wife would blow this way out of proportion, but I still feel it was wrong. All the other parents love her, and she's a good teacher, it's just very WTF. I'll probably just delete her number off my phone (It's currently under than name "Larry" lol)

OP posts:
BluddyMoFo · 10/04/2011 22:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
FilerDad · 10/04/2011 22:56

Posting under my usual would reveal too much info, biscuit brigade!

OP posts:
Original poster
FilerDad · 10/04/2011 22:58

Oh my, I think we might actually have somethign in common, she suits me right to the ground. She just text me that she's thinking of me while she wees in the bath!

OP posts:
queenbathsheba · 10/04/2011 22:58

Yep you do that, get rid of the number and pretend it never happened. this young woman is no threat to children, she likes adult men, you say she's highly regarded as a teacher so leave it be.

It's not worth the aggro of upsetting your wife and ruinning this young women's career. It will also make you look conceited and boastful if you draw attention to it.

ENormaSnob · 10/04/2011 22:58

Why put her number under a false name?

Tryharder · 10/04/2011 23:02

She fancied you and came onto you, you have the choice to either take it further or not to. You sound like you are going for the latter option (sensible bloke).

However, if I were in your position, I would be very flattered by the attention (old gimmer emoticon) and I personally would tell my DH because he'd be quite amused by it all and we'd laugh about it. However, if you think your DW would kick off and all hell would break loose, I would probably not tell her tbh. And I certainly wouldn't tell the headmistress either because it's not right for someone to possibly lose their job over a lapse of judgement. And if you tell the headmistress and she confronts the teacher, how do you know the teacher will not get her back up and say that she only responded to your come-on?

I would pretend that nothing happened and carry on as normal. Smile

NonnoMum · 10/04/2011 23:04

I'm with helium.

Either tell the head, in passing, that it is marvellous that all the young teachers hand out their mobile phone numbers these days, or wake up from your fantasy.

And text every day at nine to check that DC has their lunchbox.

Tryharder · 10/04/2011 23:05

Fucking hell, is this a wind-up.

wubblybubbly · 10/04/2011 23:07

How nice.

MollieO · 10/04/2011 23:08

Why did you put her number in your phone? You need a big shovel to dig your way out of this. Have a Biscuit

AgentZigzag · 10/04/2011 23:09

'She just text me that she's thinking of me while she wees in the bath!'

Grin priceless.