to think people should at least get a basic grounding in genetics before they cast aspersions on my fidelity/ relationship history?

[IntergalacticHussy]

I'm sick of acquaintances and sometimes complete strangers coming up to me and demanding to know why my kids look different to one another.

Yesterday was a prime example; bumped into an acquaintance i've known for a few years who took a look at my dcs and just blurted out 'so why do they have such different colour hair?' in this really quite aggressive way.

A list of possible answers flashed through my mind

1. Because. obviously they're not identical twins; there's years between them!
2. I don't bloody know, ask a geneticist!
3. start mumbling about dh's sperm, my eggs and recessive genes in a pseudo-scientific manner

Just to underline what he meant, he then started mumbling on about his own kids (who look totally different!) and how people must think he only fathered one of them. Bit weird really, maybe this he's projecting his own insecurities onto my kids.

This is just one example of the conversations i end up having with people i barely know, day after day. As it happens they have the same dad, but if they didn't, it wouldn't concern you anyway, I feel like saying. If we were friends, that would be the kind of thing you'd already know about my family and the fact that you have to piss about asking daft questions just underlines the fact that we don't know each other well enough to be talking about such personal things - in the bloody supermarket of all places!

My 3 all look alike and there is no doubt who their parents are.

My father has 3 children by 2 women and his youngest 2 look nothing like me or their mother.

I am afraid I have said something like this. My children have very different colouring to one another and I just find it interesting when I notice this in other families. Interesting enough to comment just to make conversation. Not to accuse anyone of anything ! Maybe she was just having a chat ?

I've been mistaken for my charges' mum a couple of times as they do sort or resemble me.... chubby, brown haired! I've always had that, as a nanny who is white and English people are a bit shocked when I say I'm the nanny rather than mum. I've never had 'are you sure?' but I have had people going hmmm, but you do look alike! Previously had two charges who were mixed middle Eastern/white and I was occasionally mistaken for mum.

Was speaking to a mum in park with a boy same age as my oldest charge, and she said because she was Polish she was always assumed to be the nanny and had to put people strait. Her lad had been raised in England and had an English dad so spoke with an English accent- so people never believed she was his mum!

I've always joked that the DC aren't mine, definitely DPs, but not mine, lol.

DS looked like a little clone of DP but with blond hair and blue eyes (we're both dark) he's no longer blond, but he still looks like DP, which is actually a bit disconcerting now that he's the same height.

DD looks like my sister had a child with my DP - me and my sister look nothing alike at all, I keep trying to convince my sister that she belongs with her, but she's having none of it, lol.

I think it's funny though that people have some sort of expectation of what other people's children should look like, I don't know much about genetics, but even I know that you can't predict that

Oh people are jusy making conversation there is no need to feel insulted / get the hump.

But while we are playing this game:

Our DC actually look just like their dad. We once got

"There is no doubt who the father is, is there?"

mmmmm .... thanks for confirming my fidelity

Ruddy hell, carikube! I do hope the people on the stand were first years or admin assistants or something... (IME conference/exhibition stands are usually staffed by the most junior people but fgs, junior people should know not to make ridiculous comments like that!)

I think we managed to establish that the people on the stand were students so after telling them that there was something wrong with what they were saying, we wandered off muttering under our breath about how they had obviously learned nothing so far on their course...

How rude. My parents had the same when we were kids - my sister was blonde with blue eyes, like most people in my dad's family (although he himself has brown hair) and I have dark brown hair, brown eyes and olive skin like my mum and her mum.

I think the right answer to such a stupid comment is "because they are not identical twins"