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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's really not a good idea revealing the sad contents of our 6 year olds diary complete with photos in your newspaper column ?

27 replies

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 07/04/2011 09:27

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1374214/I-peeked-year-olds-diary--realised-just-early-girls-learn-hate-bodies.html

Yes, yes I know it's the daily mail but even so what a disgusting thing to do.... it's not as if the poor child can make an informed choice. Pah

OP posts:
PoledrathePissedOffFairy · 07/04/2011 09:30

Well, there's a child who's learned never to trust her mother with her secrets - poor little thing.

ChristinedePizan · 07/04/2011 09:30

Someone should send the mother a copy of Delusions of Gender. And a tenner towards therapy for her daughter :(

DELHI · 07/04/2011 09:33

Doesn't even look real to me... what 6-year-old forms a letter 'a' like that?Very dodgy all round IMO.

Original poster
ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 07/04/2011 09:34

Takes a lot to shock me but that has made me feel Sad

She'll be flogging her kids souls next

I was only on the site because I was sent a gay caveman link, which is how I spotted it Blush

OP posts:
winnybella · 07/04/2011 09:35

Yeah, the writing seemed like an adult's.

Still, a shitty thing to do to your child.

Original poster
ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 07/04/2011 09:36

The letters on the page look very different to the ones in the grid on the next page Hmm

OP posts:
SpiderObsession · 07/04/2011 09:37

I'm surprised the little girl is still writing in her diary. :(

psychoveggie · 07/04/2011 09:42

YANBU. That's horrible. Quite ironic that it's now next to headlines like "Hot legs! The Saturdays dare to bare..." and "Here's proof! Stripes going around DON'T add pounds."

I really can't comprehend what is going through the mother's head, at what point of this disturbing revelation about her six-year-old's psyche did she think "I know I'll write an article about this with pictures to illustrate."

I only have a DS (who I hope won't be so vulnerable to body image issues as girls are) but I still make sure that I don't do the self-critical thing in front of him - I think it's only responsible to curb your normal urges to say something negative about your appearance if you're having a bad day in front of children. We should be demonstrating acceptance and healthy attitudes to weight and beauty not obsession with perfection.

valiumredhead · 07/04/2011 09:46

I expect she made it up!

Skinit · 07/04/2011 09:47

Where has the child heard such things? I have a 6 year old DD and her diary is full of things like "Becky is my best friend" and "Tara is good!" THis woman must have been manng about her weight etc in front of the poor kid.

Skinit · 07/04/2011 09:48

DELHI m 6 year old does A's like that....she's learning to write cursive.

Catkinsthecatinthehat · 07/04/2011 09:52

Where has the child heard such things Skinit?
Try here: www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1310361/Ive-Twiglet-year-old-think-shes-fat-I-going-MY-wobbly-bits.html

She seems to revel in the misogyny of her husband and the sons she's raised. No wonder the little kid has such a poor body image (although I accept this could all be made up by a publicity seeking journo)

PoledrathePissedOffFairy · 07/04/2011 09:58

Jesus, Catkins, I hope she's made it all up! How stupid can some people be??

jamaisjedors · 07/04/2011 10:12

God when you read both articles you can see why her daughter would write that.

The atmosphere in that house (with teenage sons telling their mum to lay off the chocolate in case she gets fat) sounds horrific.

Am a bit Hmm about how the daughter is dressed too - in both pics - nail varnish, head to toe pink and sequins.

Perhaps the the journo should read the "hair clip" thread or the femininist section for a few tips on bringing up a girl?

WidowWadman · 07/04/2011 10:25

Is there actually nothing to protect children from their parents' narcissism? Why are the pictures of that poor girl published alongside all her insecurities? Angela Epstein kind of seems to be aware that she's got herself to blame for giving her daughter these insecurities, is she really too thick to notice that by publishing it in a newspaper with pictures and everything it is going to make it probably worse?

And don't have editors at least a tiny flake of morals left in them telling them that it's not fair to expose a child which can't consent to it like that?

kreecherlivesupstairs · 07/04/2011 10:34

I can't take is seriously, I know the woman is a writer, but sentances like 'my dd pirouetted out of the front door'. Come on.

PoledrathePissedOffFairy · 07/04/2011 10:37

But actually, kreecher, doesn't that in itself say a lot about her? She wants a 'little princess/ballerina/angel' for a daughter, and will push that image onto her daughter in every way, including how she thinks about her, describes her and speaks to her.

tethersend · 07/04/2011 10:41

"I know that reading someone else?s diary is the ultimate act of betrayal."

Whereas writing about it in a national newspaper is...?

If it were real. Which it quite clearly isn't.

WidowWadman · 07/04/2011 10:42

If it's made up, it doesn't make it any better - it's still attached to her daughter's name and picture. I guess you can't produce any better bully-fodder.

FreudianSlippery · 07/04/2011 10:44

Whether it's real or not, what a horrible thing to do to a child Angry

megapixels · 07/04/2011 10:52

What a pig. Yes reading reading someone else?s diary is the ultimate act of betrayal, and your daughter will never forget it thanks to the public record of it.

I am a bit Hmm at some of the things written there and especially all the body bits that she wants to change. Maybe it's just my daughters but I didn't think they gave a crap about those things at this age.

PoledrathePissedOffFairy · 07/04/2011 11:03

Yy Widow, exactly!

TotemPole · 07/04/2011 11:04

What a horrible thing to do & her husband sound awful.

TotemPole · 07/04/2011 11:07

I agree, it doesn't even have to be sustained bullying. The odd comment now and then will reinforce what she thinks.

Onetoomanycornettos · 07/04/2011 12:43

I do think girls of about 6/7 can go through a very self-critical phase. The Toddler Taming guy (Christopher Green?) says that up til 5/6, children don't really make social comparisons, they then go through a massive realisation they are not 'the best' at everything. I found around this age (6/7) my daughter started saying 'I'm stupid' and 'I'm rubbish at everything' or even 'I hate my life'. She is not so focused on looks, but again, the odd thing which others have said bothers her.

BUT, the key advice was not to make too much of this. I've tried to help her see that just because you do one wrong thing in a day, doesn't make you rubbish at everything. It's working great, and she's now better able to evaluate her life in a much more realistic way.

But little girls can be over-dramatic and the best thing is to play it down and deal with it tactfully, not attract as much attention to it and publish it in a newspaper!