to think i am a cleaner, not a fucking housekeeper/general dogsbody!!

[superv1xen]

i have a small cleaning business, ok its basically just me, my mop and my hoover, and a gumtree ad :o i have got 3 clients and work 3 days a week.

one of my clients has the most cluttered house i have ever seen, it makes it really hard for me to clean at the best of times as i don't like to move stuff too much plus she always leaves stuff that looks like rubbish lying around but i darent chuck it in case its important (she works from home). she also expects me to change her beds and clean out her coffee machine, which is a right fiddly arse of a job. also i usually have to fill the dishwasher as theres usually a few pots and pans lying about in the kitchen. i think this is a bit above and beyond what i would ask of a cleaner, (my other clients wouldnt dream of asking me to do that) but i need the money work so i just accept it. but today they really took the piss IMO.

i got there and her and her DH were cooking a fry up (hmm) so i went and did the upstairs first to stay out of their way. and came down to find that there were greasy, filthy pots and pans ALL over the work surfaces, the cooker was swimming in grease and the sink was overflowing with dishes. in the sitting room the dining table was covered with dirty cups, plates etc, it looked like they had had some kind of dinner party last night. so i had no choice but to empty their (full) dishwasher and put everything away so i could put all their dirty pots in there and do a new load (to clear them out of the way more than anything) and there wasn't even enough space in there for everything so i had to handwash a load too. and it took me ages to rid the cooker top of its horrible black greasiness. there was also disgusting bits of food and stuff all over the worktops which i had to bin, i was nearly sick i swear.

AIBU or does that take the piss a bit? when i was growing up we had a cleaner when i lived at home and my mum used to make sure it was tidy-ish for when she came so she could do a decent job. as do my other clients!

Stop working for them. Then draw up a clear list about what you will an d will not clean and stick to it.

As a fellow cleaner I sympathise. I think people are missing the point here, most cleaners won't mind doing a bit of normal washing up, cleaning the top of the cooker off every week, mopping up spills on worktops and things like that. However, what Op describes sounds disgusting, she said that it nearly made her throw up. I've only once had clients who expected me to clean up what was frankly a week's worth of their filth. I sacked them on week 4. Not only did it take ages to clean because of all their clutter, a week's worth of spilt food on the floor, mouldering food on every work surface, cat litter throughout the house... they then had the cheek to leave notes every week asking me to make sure I did things like "clean the mirror wardrobes every week". EVERY WEEK? A whole wall of mirror wardrobes when they only wanted to pay for two hours and they lived like pigs? I don't think so.
I think you need to set out what you will do in the time they want you to work, but I don't think you can really plan for people like these. Most people will leave a few spills, a mucky hob, bits of food on the floor and that's part of the job.

I normally quote for a reasonable amount of time to give the house a good clean, that's van the carpets, wash hard floors, dust, clean kitchen (including hob but not oven), clean bathrooms including keeping limescale under control. I leave myself a bit of leeway so that I can also give them a sort of rolling programme of the jobs that can't be fitted in every week. So each week I'll do something like windows on one floor, or wipe off skirtings and tops of doors (which gather a lot of dust), or pull out any furniture I can and clean underneath. So the idea is that after the first month they can really see their house looking nice.
For those who like their beds changed, ironing, laundry done etc. For many cleaners that's not a problem if you ask in advance and are prepared to allow a realistic time. It's not cleaning though, cleaning is generally understood to be making the house clean. (I hate ironing, so if asked just say that I don't offer that service).
£11 per hour by the way, in the South East and very highly recommended by my customers.

p.s. The other thing I sacked some people for - every week filthy, disgusting, shitty toilets. I'm afraid if you really think it's OK to leave your shit for someone else to clean up every week then you are showing a lack of respect.

I think you're well within your rights to "sack" any employer who isn't a good match, but I think you're seriously limiting your client base.

What you described sounds pretty much like my house - except usually there's about 43 items of clothing draped all over the place. I knew when we hired the cleaning lady that there was no way we'd get along with someone who regarded their job as just cleaning - we also needed someone to tidy, return stuff to its rightful place, amuse (or at least not freak out!) the pets/children, put up with my grumpy husband etc. We have an ANGEL of a cleaning lady - I just LOVE her!

But as others have pointed out even if they did have a one-off nuclear explosion in the kitchen due to unexpected dinner party and monster hangovers, why do you care if it takes you longer if you get paid for it? Or if you do your shift and they don't want to pay extra, it doesn't get done.

OP - you need to agree at the beginning what the contract entails. I have had many cleaners over my working life (good, bad and indifferent) and have now got a fab cleaner who has turned into a good friend.

We agreed at the beginning basic dusting, polishing, vacuuming and floor washing. Anything else to be written on a list as an extra if time allows (eg inside windows).

My cleaner said at the outset she would prefer the house tidy as she can do much more and I always make sure it is clear for her.

Good cleaners are in high demand - I imagine you would easily get better clients if you ditched these. I think expecting you to clean a filthy cooker top is horrid.

(I must admit - I always clean the toilets thoroughly before my cleaner comes!)

YANBU, I agree about 'cleaner etiquette'. I always ensure the house is tidy for our cleaner and under no circumstances would I expect her to clean skid marks off the toilet or do our washing up!

Occasionally I might ask her to clean the bin (it's buil in one) but I usually do that myself.

She says it's a pleasure to clean our house because when she's finished it sparkles like a showhome! (The effect only lasts for a couple of hours though )

You've got a good cleaner if you go in the bathroom and it looks as if it's just been installed (within reason, we don't generally replace broken tiles . I can get limescaley taps shiny and new looking, remove limescale from tiles and you'll suddenly realise what colour they are, I can within reason rejuvenate your grouting and get rid on nasty black and brown marks. And, for my final trick, I can make your shower screen gleam like the ones in a posh hotel.
Why would you want me to waste time wading through your clutter or scrubbing away at a pan you couldn't be bothered to clean last night? However, I will if the price is right and you don't mind paying for the extra time.

What I won't do is stick with people who obviously drop food on the floor all week, thinking "Leave it, Lucy will clear it up on Friday".

How do you manage to rejuvenate grouting Lucy? I have been working my way through all the bathroom products in the supermarket, have been blasting them with Lakeland stuff and am now reduced to covering with a white grout cover stuff?

rookie - diluted bleach. I almost wrote diluted vodka.

Oh Lucy you are so right. The bathroom is the best bit, when I come home from work and it sparkles. She bleaches the grout and makes the taps shine, and I just love her for it :o

Who do you employ to deal with horrid jobs then?
My cleaner sacked me because I complained about her not rinsing the oven properly - horrid smells when about to cook dinner.
I had asked if she minded doing ovens, paid £12 per hour and said twice please double rinse I do not mind paying for extra time I hate the smell of oven cleaner.
Cleaner wanted to use said product rather than elbow grease and soap.
This was the third time.
I now pay a baby sitter to take children out (cheaper) and do it myself while enjoying the peace and quiet.

Superv- where are you? If you are in the south east pm me, I am DESPERATE for someone to help out!

Just out of curiosity ladies who have and do clean - if I employed a cleaner would you be mega pissed off if I just sat on the sofa and drank coffee and ate chocolate? Genuine question?

Rookiemater, Grotbuster is actually pretty good for nasty grout, and it is worth trying on lots of the marks that develop in the corners in bathrooms.
For sparkly shower screens you need to rinse off any cleaning product you've used on the limescale, roughly towel dry (a cleaner always needs her towel) and then polish it up with a magic cloth. I think it's worth a few finishing touches, like don't just clean a sink, dry it off with a towel as well so that people go in and it looks just great. I don't love cleaning really, but I do believe in giving people a bit of added value. I know how nice it is to come home from work and someone has made your house look lovely.
Figgyrolls I would be perfectly happy to clean around you, I'd just ask you to lift your feet as I "lightly" vacuum. (Don't know what light vacuuming is, I give it as much elbow as is required to clean the carpet, and have my own cleaner because most clients have Dyson rubbish in their cupboards). I'm in the South East by the way, normally working in the Brands Hatch area.
I carry a card for an Oven Man, who is fanatical about making ovens spotless and only charges I think £50 for the hours he spends making them sparkle.

Thanks Lucy I will try Grot buster.

Laughed about the Dyson. Parents bought us one, keeps getting hairs trapped in it ( I have long hair) then it won't work properly. Dug out our old £35.00 Tesco hoover as couldn't be bothered to get Dyson repaired, and what do you know its much easier to push than the huge lumbering Dyson and does a much better job at picking up the bits.

I have a couple of fabulous cleaners who come for 3 hours in total (1.5 hours each) once a week. They are the first cleaners I have had that will do a bit of tidying, dishes and loading the dishwasher.

We both work full time and although we do have a tidy round before the cleaner comes, and I prefer not to leave them any dishes, sometimes we run out of time and it such a godsend having them tidy up a bit rather than just swishing a duster round.

I pay them more than the agency rate, gave them a large Xmas bonus, pay them when we're on holiday, which we don't have to under the agency contract, and have also let one of them pay in installments when she bought our car as she wouldn't have been able to afford one otherwise.

They're the first cleaners we have had that have lasted more than a couple of months, they have been with us for 18 months.

If you don't want to do those thongs then get another client, but frankly moaning about a greasy cooker is ludicrous.

Lucy - I ditched the dyson for a miele, my life has changed. For the better. Still would like some help though as am pooped! You aren't that far from me, but expect that you are a little too far

you are a cleaner, not a tidier up-er!
So, yes they are taking the piss & living like slobs.

I'm puzzled by people who tidy and especially clean before the cleaner arrives. Our cleaner also irons, tidies up, takes trash out, cleans whatever needs to be cleaned, and has occasionally bought milk or cleaning products on her way over. She does this while babysitting sleeping DS in the afternoon, if I need to go out for something.

Obviously, it takes longer than if she were only cleaning the floors or whatever but as long as we are willing to pay for the extra time, what can possibly be the problem? This is her chosen profession and she wants more work.

There's no way you live in squalor though Cote. I'd bet money on it

I don't think it's unreasonable to ask you to do general household cleaning/tidying duties as a cleaner - but then they do need to pay you to do it and you're more than entitled to decide what you want to do within your role as a cleaner! I think you should have a conversation with them to align expectations.

We're not as bad as your employers but aware that our house gets a bit untidy during the week. We pay our cleaner an hour more than we'd think would be needed otherwise to account for that. But she's quite a rubbish cleaner tbh - nothing like Lucyinthepie describes.

I tidy before the cleaner comes so she can spend the 2 hours she is here on actual cleaning, rather than picking crap up off the floors in order to hoover them. Kitchen surfaces likewise.

Right, I've read the thread now
Personally, I'd make sure the house was tidy before the cleaner got here. Because I like to have a tidy house in the 1st place!
I wouldn't leave shit down the loo, that's gross!!!

YABU

I agree with Northern Girl. My house is messy (not that dirty) and my saint of a cleaner keeps my house under control. After she has been, I enjoy about an hour or tidy/clean bliss and then wait for her return a week later.

I absolutely expect her to do whatever is required to return the house to a spotless state and I pay her a good rate with many hours.

Sounds like you are a rubbish, bolshy cleaner and I would sack you if you refused to clean a coffee machine! Surely she is paying you to do it?

My cleaner was so fab, but she became more of a housekeeper and worked 8 hours per week.

One example: when I gave birth, the place was a tip, I was in hospital for a week and DH turned up at home with a bag full of blood covered clothing and knickers, which she just discreetly took from him and returned to my drawers sparkling clean.

I suspect OP would have found that gross/insulting. But it all depends on the relationship you want to have with your employers.